2013 has been a fecking terrible year. It can't end fast enough. Hopefully I make it through these last 24 days without issue.

Sometimes you've just got to let go where you can. I've gained so much weight and trying not to get depressed about it, I have to think of the positives about myself. Being that my weight has always been used against me i tried everything I knew how, to lose it. I lost a nice bit of it, but since everything happened, I've gained almost all my weight back (233lbs now, up from a solid 210, which was down from a solid 240)

Every woman and girl I was with (except this most recent one) used it as a weapon against me or made it seem like it was something they didn't like about me. I was happy with my progress and now I'm at a point I don't even want to look in the mirror. Nobody would know I'm that unhappy with it, I'm always smiling laughing and in good spirits. Takes a true mind reader to know the pain behind the eyes, BUT I've learned to take a new medication.

FUKITOL! (Fukaldatshit Sulfate)

I took stock of my life and person. While I'm not the best person on the planet, I think I'm pretty damned awesome. more man than most men, got a decently large willy, know how to use it, responsible, intelligent, thoughtful, accepting, inquisitive, talented, and most of all got a drive to succeed.

Yeah, I'm the hot dookie... so what if I'm chubby would I like to be fit? yes... My life just doesn't have time for it right now. 12 hour full days at work, 4 hour commute total leaves just 8 hours in my day for sleeping eating, exercising, and socializing. considering you need 8 hours of sleep, there's like really no time in my day for anything other than work, LOL! unfortunate. So I have to take a dose of Fukaldatshit Sulfate. I'll just hate to look in the mirror until I get free of these burdens.

2013 has taken a lot of things from people. It has taken a lot of PEOPLE from people. This year sucks, and if I can make it through the last 24 days, I'll be okay.

I knew this year was going to suck based on my New Years, LOL! I've come out not permanently damaged, though. Happy about that much ... Lots of other people aren't so lucky. I live by making sure to be thankful for my life.

That all said, there is something to the feeling of knowing you're surviving in some SERIOUSLY tough stretch of life. To be able to look at people who say "all you have to do is..." or "did you even try that??" and know that I can honestly say "shut the fuck up." LOL! It's nice to see people who think they've made the come up on their own and see what adversity they faced and learned they had it SUPER easy and then listen to them pass judgement on people without thought.

Have a friend who's going through even MORE tough time than me. like wow... though it's his own doing, I can't take away from his struggle. God Speed my gentleman, God Speed!

For the giggle factor, LOL!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8pyQvzWM9M

LMAO!!!

Struggle Puffz had me in tears laughing.