Nocturnal erections but none in the day time

[OodlesONoodles Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close OodlesONoodles]

I'm going to start off by saying I do not, nor have I ever watched porn with any regularity(it's been months, and I often go months in-between).

I've had this problem since I was about 16. I'm 33 and I didn't even have access to porn of any sort until I was in my 20s. This is not a porn problem. I stress this because literally all of my attempts to research results in people saying "Lay off the porn and you'll get 100% better ^__^".

I literally never get erections during the day time. The only time I get an erection is if I'm actively physically engaged with a woman. But(and this is important), it's not certain. I'd say about 1/5 times I just don't even get hard enough for penetration. And about half of the time I won't get hard enough a second time if I don't finish while I'm initially hard. This isn't a new problem or explainable by being 33, because this used to happen when I was 17 and 25 as well.

My partners up to this point have never been over 150lbs, and usually cute faces, so it's not a case of "Fat ugly wife/girlfriend 'ED'". It's also not nerves as my current relationship is about 2 years old. It's just inconsistent.

I rarely masturbate. It's been well over a month at present. Even when I'm single it's maybe once every couple of weeks, just because I'm never horny by myself. The only time I can even get hard enough to masturbate is in the morning when I just woke up. If I tried in the middle of the afternoon - forget it. I'll get a soft-on at best.

I've always had difficulty ejaculating, with or without a partner. It takes a bare minimum of 20 minutes, and usually over a half an hour. Sometimes I just won't cum no matter what. This is true both by myself and with a woman. Sometimes I just never cum and my dick just tires out and starts going limp.

My body fat level is about 20%. I'm 5'11" at 170lbs so about 135lbs of LBM which is about average strength. I bike and run at times. I'm neither particularly athletic, nor particularly out of shape. I can jog 3 miles or so.

I've had my testosterone levels, as well as a full male hormone panel run and literally all of my blood work is well within a healthy range. My total test is around 600, free test is about 16, and my prolactin levels were pretty normal though I think slightly above average.

I've tried abstaining from sex and ejaculation for up to three months, and I never had daytime erections. They just don't happen.

I've already done keagals and reverse keagals for at least a decade so that's not going to help.

I've tried taking a bunch of different pills. Vitamin D, ZMA, Vitamin K2, Maca, fenugreek, ginseng and royal jelly. I even tried Cialis, and while it helped improve my hardness with my girlfriend, it didn't do literally anything for day time erections in the absence of sexual contact.

I've also tried speaking with three different urologists, which was a colossal waste of time. Two dismissed it outright and the third just offered me a Viagra prescription. Which is not even close to what I want.

I have never used drugs. I have never suffered from depression or any other mental illness.

So where would I start in getting to the bottom of this?

[closed224 Senior Member Member of the Month Dec 2014, Feb 2017 Find all posts View Profile Close closed224]

I think you have not prioritized your penis, ejaculating system, sex life including masturbation. I think you find other things more satisfying and rewarding. Also more important. So your brain and body don't really care about those things. I would guess you are pretty tight assed and did RKs and Ks by rote with no real investment of energy into making a lifestyle change around your Pelvic Floor.
My guess is you were a good student and now a successful business man. If you truly want this to change you will have to let go and prioritize this area of your body and life.

[OodlesONoodles Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close OodlesONoodles]

I think you have not prioritized your penis, ejaculating system, sex life including masturbation. I think you find other things more satisfying and rewarding. Also more important. So your brain and body don't really care about those things.

That may be. Though I'm not sure where to start on correcting something like that.

I would guess you are pretty tight assed and did RKs and Ks by rote with no real investment of energy into making a lifestyle change around your Pelvic Floor.

I'm not very uptight honestly, but you're right about not investing energy into a "lifestyle change around my Pelvic Floor". But I also don't really know what that even means.

If you truly want this to change you will have to let go and prioritize this area of your body and life.

And what would that entail?

[closed224 Senior Member Member of the Month Dec 2014, Feb 2017 Find all posts View Profile Close closed224]

Do a kegels routine with dedication. Really feel each. Start with 10nof each. Slowly build up to 50 of each. Do a yoga routine that focuses on abs, lower back, pelvis and thighs. Spend time learning the sensitive places on your penis. Also try to change your relationship to your penis. Develop the idea that sex and your penis even masturbation are important to you.

Look up the threads on delayed ejaculation. There will be more information thdre.

[Aethelwulf Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Aethelwulf]

Also try visiting a psychosexual therapist. Since you've had your hormones checked and there's no obvious medical condition causing your absent libido it makes it sound psychosomatic.

[Injoker Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Injoker]

Could it be psychological?

[OodlesONoodles Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close OodlesONoodles]

Do a kegels routine with dedication. Really feel each. Start with 10nof each. Slowly build up to 50 of each. Do a yoga routine that focuses on abs, lower back, pelvis and thighs. Spend time learning the sensitive places on your penis. Also try to change your relationship to your penis. Develop the idea that sex and your penis even masturbation are important to you.

Look up the threads on delayed ejaculation. There will be more information thdre.

I'm reading the threads on delayed ejaculation now. I never had a term for that problem, so I should have a lot of stuff to test.

I'll try focusing on the kegals more. It is true that I always did them while my mind was somewhere else. One of the things that initially drew me to them was how I could do them during my commute or while working. I always like stacking tasks... which I'm guessing is one of my potential problems.

Could it be psychological?

It could be. But that's an extremely broad topic. I don't see clear signs it is - but that doesn't prove much. I don't suffer from the common issues such as anxiety or sexual repression. Nor self esteem issues or any kind of sexual trauma. Those are the only specific psychological issues I'm aware of. But it could be something else.

[closed224 Senior Member Member of the Month Dec 2014, Feb 2017 Find all posts View Profile Close closed224]

I applaud your willingness to look inside and identify what it is. There is a ton of information on here but it won't help without you implementing. Congratulations on beginning a new self discovery journey. Maybe start a progress log. This can help you track your goals. This is the Penis Enhancement Gym. Enhancement means so much more than sjze. Good luck and enjoy.