Psychological

[D`Argo Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close D`Argo]

Hey guys. I gave some of the same information in the introduction post, but I decided that I wanted to make a new post for this.

Basically I am having some serious psychological blocks going on here. How do I know that they're psychological? I've had 2 or 3 doctor checkups and everyone one has come out clean. Nothing bad in the bloodwork and I'm healthy otherwise. I frequently wake up with hardons that are rock solid. I'm 34.

This is one of the most frustrating things that I've ever dealt with. I know that a lot of my problems had to stem from my ex-wife of 11 years. Before meeting my fiancé now, she was the only person that I had ever had sex with and she had a lot of hang-ups and inhibitions. I loved her so I stuck with her, but 11 years of programming is a long time.

Take this morning as an example. My fiancé and I are going at it just fine, but she can't get into it because she thinks her daughter is in the other room and can hear. No big deal, I say, so we get dressed to get some breakfast and wait for her daughter to leave the house to go golfing, and discover that she wasn't there to begin with. We get back to bed to continue and mr happy here is out of commission for good. Nothing can get him up. All I did was stop and walk to the kitchen and back! It pisses me off so much because I can feel that I can get an erection, but I can also feel something in my head stopping it.

I must also say that I'm so glad to have a fiancé who is patient to help me through this and also be smoking hot at the same time.

So this is why I'm here. I've ordered the book, but I don't have it yet. I've seen enough info in the beginner forums that I can get started today - especially from PEsuccessGuy. It is my hope that doing this and working diligently will get me off of the need to use Viagra. I'm hoping to get some support from anyone here, because it's scary and frustrating at the same time when the little guy doesn't do anything. You can feel despair pretty quick.

Thanks for reading.

[PESG Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close PESG]

PE can definitely help with erection difficulties but it sounds like this incident was more psychological than pysiological. I personally hate having sex or doing anything sexual when I know someone can hear me or when someone knows I'm doing it. But PE can help if you do have a dependence on Viagara (not saying you do). But be basic. Do some light stretching and light-grip jelqs at 50-60% erection level (less is okay too). Only jelq for 5-7 minutes (10 minutes tops). Good luck and remember to ask questions whenever you have them. That's what we are here for!

[W.M.P. Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close W.M.P.]

Welcome to PE Gym, D' Argo.

As PEsG already stated, your deal is psychological. See, part of the problem here is that, for WAY too long, women had been the only ones who's libido had been known to depend heavily on their minds, whereas us men have always been held to some kind of purely animalistic, mindless standard when it comes to performing in bed. However, this perception of a man's sexual prowess as being 100% dependent on physicality, has been slowy erased by modern research on this topic. I know what it's like to have some kind of minor "bullshit" (for a lack of a better word) kill the mood, and it usually happens that once the mood has been temporarily dampened, it is better to just go do something else and wait for another chance. You don't have to be clinically depressed or anything like that to have temporary, psychological "boner killers"; all you need is a minor thing like having an unexpected knock at the door while you're at it with your girl, and your dick is quite likely to react like this: . When you're in the mood, you basically go into "primal" mode, where your inner Neanderthal is bent on filling that sweet peach with your seed. What I've found to be the worst killer for that primal mode, is anything that might resemble your gal's loss of interest on the task at hand (which in this case was her focusing on her daughter's possible proximity to your romp instead of solely focusing on the 2 of you). I for one can get the most fearsome of all boners any time of the day, only to be completely deflated by any sign of loss of interest from my girl. What you've been experiencing is completely normal, so next time it happens, just say "You know what, babe? I'm a bit tired and in need of a little boost, so how about we brew ourselves a nice cup of coffee/tea, chill for a bit and then get back to bussiness?." This will give you a chance to relax, gather your mojo back into place and get going with the lady once again. The worst thing you can do when your pecker decides to bench himself is to try and push him back into the court before he's truly ready to get back in the game. The more you try pushing him back into the game, the more he's gonna seem to be growing roots on that bench.

[D`Argo Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close D`Argo]

Thanks for chiming in, guys. WMP: I do need to learn to relax a bit more since I can get pretty uptight when something like this happens. This happens even though I KNOW it's just temporary. And besides, why be hard on myself when she was having trouble, too? I think it's because everything rides on whether little henry is up or not. Puns all intended, of course. Foreplay and oral are all great, but when it's innercourse time...

PESuccessGuy. I am following your back to the basics routine in your other thread. I started yesterday and will post my experiences later when I have more time. Thanks, both of you.

[jayhawk11 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close jayhawk11]

Do you have progress log? If you don't, go ahead and make one. It's a good way to get feedback from other people, and if you ever get stuck, you can look back and find what you may be doing wrong.

[D`Argo Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close D`Argo]

Thanks for the replay, jayhawk11. I planned on starting a log, but I was going to make it a pen and paper one. I was going to run to the store today and get the notebooks for it.

[flyboy351 Member Find all posts View Profile Close flyboy351]

Hey... I also have erection problems and believe a lot of it is stress or psychological. You're not alone bud.

[D`Argo Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close D`Argo]

Ok, guys. I need some serious help here. I’m having a really hard time and am getting depressed over this crap. Without my Levitra I can’t get hard enough on my own to have decent innercourse. Let me elaborate. I think my erection would stand somewhere around 80-85% or something like that. Just hard enough where you can stick it in with a little outside assistance. When I get inside I don’t get any harder than that and have to employ tricks like crossing my legs to achieve an in and out motion. Having to do that will totally piss me off and I’ll just lose the boner entirely.

I am now for the first time in my life completely dependant on a pill to have sex. Bayer knows they have me by the balls, too, because they charge $15 for each pill.

In my first post I said that I frequently wake up with rock hard boners. That’s not entirely true because now that I really pay attention and think about it, it only seems to happen 40-50% of the time.

On to PE.

PE is hard for me because I don’t get any time to myself. Ever. I’m not looking for any type of size increase, so I’ve cherry picked the exercises that have been advertised for ED – the kegel and edging. I do kegels 2 days on and 1 day off. I’ve gotten better at them and can see improvement in that area. The area of doing kegels.

I don’t have the alone time to do edging, so I have to treat innercourse as my edging session. In order to do that I have to take Levitra. Levitra is expensive, so I’ve bought enough supply to take 1 pill every other day. So every other day I will have an extra long sex session (to me) which is going at it like 3 times or so. I don’t know if this is helpful or not.

I feel really frustrated about right now. I really feel like this shouldn’t be happening to me since there isn’t anything medically wrong that doctors have found.

[ksutroubleii Member Find all posts View Profile Close ksutroubleii]

I had the same problem getting erections. I did however refuse to get put on medication for it. Trust me on this one, do some jelqs. Make sure you warm up for at least 10, preferably longer. Then do some jelqs, about 5-7 minutes worth and use a really light grip. Then take a day off or not depending on how you feel, my routine is 1 day on 2 days off. You will notice a change quickly if you do the jelqs right...very light grip, and nice and slow.

EDIT: I mean add some jelqs to what you are already doing. If the edging is causing you concern just do warm up, some light jelqs, and some light stretches. You might to think about drinking some green tea as well. Many people on here (including myself) swear by it.

[Big Al AdministratorPEGym EditorMale Enhancement Coach Rep.PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close Big Al]

There are some tips in this article that may help: https://www.pegym.com/forums/erectil...impotence.html

[D`Argo Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close D`Argo]

Thanks for the replies guys. I think that I can actually feel that I am gaining progress now. I have been faithful with doing my kegels and my pill fueled sex sessions. I can remember back when I first started taking the pills I would get so sore in the shaft from just having a 30 minute boner. Now after having "forced" the issue on the little guy, I have to go much longer before I start to feel sore like that again. That is progress.

I had an awesome compliment from my fiance last night. She was looking and said wow that she can see the difference in how much longer and healthier I look now from when she first started having sex with me. We proceeded to the bed (without Levitra) and my EQ was much better than previous. No leg crossing tricks needed and some things happened that were boner killers before, but I was able to recover from them. Rock on!

I am starting to incorporate jelqs soon. Thanks, ksutroubleii. I do want to point out that gains thusfar have been without jelqs. I do a lot of massaging, though. I think they could be considered very light jelqing at times. I'm confident that my EQ will continue to improve. Thanks for showing me the way with these exercises. Thanks for the link, Big Al.