Scared worried and feeling terrible

[JameMc Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JameMc]

Hi Guys

I find this very difficult to talk about but am at my wits end with worry.
Best thing I can do is give you a bit of background and say what has happened.

I was married for 19 years and my wife died suddenly from cancer! just 8 months later my mum died with the same thing.
So life has been terrible and I never expected to need to worry about sex ever again.

Despite this, the usual morning 'little chap' greeted me every day without fail and all the normal urges continued.

Well, back in October this year it was like a switch had been thrown! no morning little chap, no nothing.
Then I met this really lovely new lady and we have started a relationship.
She ticks all the boxes, is very sexy and loves me loads.
Imagine my terror when I find I just can't get it up!

Well, not one to be defeated I obtained some Viagra (via chemist) and it does work, however the results are nothing like I used to get even a few months back.
I have never been a big man down there so I need all I can muster LOL.

I hate to have to take pills to do what the rest of me wants to do desperately.

I have been to my GP, had a range of blood tests and will get the full results soon, however most seem to be normal.
I am on BP tablets and Atenolol is one of them, my GP is reducing that as its a known problem.
However I have been on it for 7 years or more with no issues.

When things are getting steamy, I find the little chap gets very wet so that bit works.
A few times there has been a good response, and the other day I even woke to find him waving in the wind, so I guess I can't be broken can I?

Got some Viapro to try as well as would be happier with natural stuff.

I have been losing weight of late very pleased with that and am trying to get all systems back in full order.
But I am so very worried about this defect, why now of all times! I'd be most grateful of any advice etc.

I am just terrified I might be broken, I have noticed a reduction down there and the little chap seems to try and pull back into me and hide.

Just to add to this, I find there is a loss of sensitivity on the end as well, not dead but not as it was.

James

[MurphKitty Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close MurphKitty]

You should consider trying "the 5 g's to big erections" and it you are taking a smart approach on attacking overall health and weight loss, so kudos to you on that. Have you attempted any PE exercises?

[kenlee6 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close kenlee6]

Change Atenolol to something else...It causes ED

[JameMc Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JameMc]

Hi and thanks for the fast reply, what are the 5 Gs?

[JameMc Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JameMc]

No matter found it! https://www.pegym.com/forums/erectil...tml#post413142 any other advice?
I just don't get the suddenness of this problem

[GTO Retired ModeratorPEGym EditorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close GTO]

Change Atenolol to something else...It causes ED

I know it affects everyone differently, but I happen to take atenelol (last 3-4 yeras) and I've seen no ill-effects from it regarding any sort of ED. It may be a combo of other meds.

[Zman007 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Zman007]

I'm more apt to attribute it to psychological factors. Any guilt over being with this new girl? How long has it been since your wife and mother passed? Phychological ED seems much more likely, though a side affect of Atenelol is also possible. How long have you been on it?

[JameMc Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JameMc]

I'm more apt to attribute it to psychological factors. Any guilt over being with this new girl? How long has it been since your wife and mother passed? Phychological ED seems much more likely, though a side affect of Atenelol is also possible. How long have you been on it?

Hi, its been two and a half years since my wife passed away, had the issue occured after I met my new lady then I would be agreeing with you fully!
Its just that it happened before we met, maybe two weeks! you see why I think it ironic.
Of course there are slight feelings of guilt, but when things are 'close' my mind is 100% focused on what's going on.
I can't even entice the little chap up myself! if you catch my drift.

[oslo Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close oslo]

I agree with 00Zman00. This might be all mental. I going through ED problems right now. Im just 25. I just resently got together with the girl of my dreams. We started to get physical I was slightly erect but not fully. We didn't go all the way just some foreplay. Ever since I have been thinking about it. Now I have been thinking about so much that I can't even give my self a erection while I masturbate. Is such and awful experience. I blame it on the whole Jelquing experience that I had years ago. Im thinking now that I damaged my penis some how. I talked to my closest friend about this he has been very supportive. First thing I'm going to the DR. and also do the 5Gs and do some Yoga. I hope everything goes back to normal. Main point is to keep positive, don't over think things because then it becomes reality. Have a support group, this forum seems to be uplifting, so this is a start. Best of luck.

[islander Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close islander]

Sorry to hear about your losses
I am happy that you have found a wonderful woman to share time with.

I had a dear friend who had ED for 15 years. He was sure it was physicall and his wife was fine with no sex as they had a sexless/bad marriage anyway. He missed his hard on's though and didn't like having ED.
We met and with a few weeks he was getting erections. Not the automatic ones in the morning but just throughout the day.
Within a month or so he was back in full swing. He realized it was mental ED and not physical. Unfortunately I am no longer in his life and soon after he returned to having ED.

So the fact your peen still works on its own when you are sleeping just give him some time. This is difficult for you to be intimate with another woman after 19 years. For reasons you may not even realize. GIve him time and hopefully you have a compationate woman that will wait too.

But may I say that intimacy comes in many forms. If you were disabled I would love you and tickle your fancy anyway. Cuddle, kiss you, carress you, massage you etc... You having hands and a mouth could satisfy me as well. So take the pressure off your peen for right now, do PE and enjoy this next stage of life.

Wishing you great luck and happiness XO

[JameMc Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JameMc]

Hi guys and girls, thanks for all the advice. I can report that near normal service has been resumed and I have not needed any chemical help at all
I have been on the 5 recommended supplements and a amino acid mix so guess that could be helping.
My doc reports that all my bloods were ok which is a bonus.
Am still getting upset when things don't respond down there as expected!
My whole body can be burning with desire but the little chap seems oblivious of it all maybe saving his energies for later LOL
I am also sure I am not getting as erect as I might do! maybe as the Atenolol works out of my system this will improve.

Main thing is my lady is very understanding and seems to know what to do etc. guess I am very blessed in that respect.

[JameMc Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JameMc]

Hi Guys

If I can just ask for some more info please.
While there seems little doubt things can and do work, I remain frustrated that not everything seems right!
Example, the little chap does not seem very sensitive! touches etc I can just about feel but not much.
This upsets my lady as when she takes me in hand or mouth, the little fellow sometimes gets disinterested despite me being very happy LOL

It would seem I need visual and mental stimulation almost more than physical to get and stay hard.

What could fix this?

[litopita Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close litopita]

Stop focusing on the "little chap"...

Little P

[mvergasioin Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close mvergasioin]

Build on your successes and try not to dwell on the negatives. ( I know this is difficult.). More importantly try to move into the moment by moment mind and physical experiences of love making with the woman rather than being a spectatator of what your dick is doing or not doing. Try to focus on her and you as an experience rather than as a process to be analysed.

[drknoba Member Find all posts View Profile Close drknoba]

Im 24yo and my tip got massively less sensitive recently. I think it has to do with receptors in your penis resulting in your penis being less sensitive. The only way is to grow more.

My penis became less sensitive because i was doing too much porn and masturbation to orgasm. I have no stopped it and after 3 weeks my sensitivity is coming back.

Do you watch porn? If so stop it. Since too much porn makes you desensitized to a physical women. If you masturbate to orgasm. Stop that for 30 days and see if the sensitivity increases.