An update on my situation advice please

[Tesla.86 Member Find all posts View Profile Close Tesla.86]

I didnt get any self going drive back, i just adpated to the situation that i need to force my self to do things, to go out, do sports, do carerr and so on.
It still is torture because my WILL is very strong, but i dont get any pleasure out of anything so i dont get power to to it further.

Of course i got times where iam really happy, times like running or driving bicycle in the woods in summer or driving along a coast and listening to music and screaming my happiness out of me, passing exams and so on.

But to get the enjoyment i need always to force my self to start em, whereas before i felt the need to.

But the hardest thing is if you have to do some work, something what doenst really interest you, iam becoming mentally tired, so tired you get the feel to pass out but you know you need to do it everyday and for hours or you loose your job for example.

The whole years i got the feeling iam drowning, and always trying to keep above the water. Thats torture.

[CUSP82 Administrator Admin of the Month Dec 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close CUSP82]

Ok before I answer the other stuff let's get back to UKGuy, the original poster on this thread. Some of you were so nice to jump in here and tell this guy that you have the same thing he has. Really? Do you know what he has? Have you read all his other posts or were you just glad that you found another guy with the "same" issue as you so you couldn't wait to get on here and comiserate. Let me tell you about UKGuy as I have been reading his posts for along time.

UKGuy is a younger man,I do beleive in his late 20's that has never had a girlfriend.Why? Well maybe he's afraid of being rejected.Maybe he's shy. Maybe he doesn't even like girls. Maybe he doesn't mind living a single life . There is nothing wrong with any of that is there? He told his dad that his dick doesn't work. Since that time he has gone to at least 3 doctors that I can recall, 2 of which were specialists, and they all came to the same conclusion; his problem is mental. His father,the man who knows him and loves him the most, and his doctors who know him far better than anyone here and have examined him, all told him he must get therapy and at least go out and try to have a date. Those that know him the best gave him the best advice.
So he comes here at times for what? To get away from what he should be trying to cure in his life, to vent and maybe find someone else that has the "same problem". When he finds that here I'm sure it sets him back on his attempt to become healed. Hey my dad and doctors are wrong because I can come to the pegym and find guys that have the same issues I have and it's because of nerve damage, a venous leak, or whatever.Regardless of the fact that he has had every test in the book that says he's fine so us here, well intention but uniformed, will give him a forum to undo all the good that is trying to be done for this young man. So do you other guys really have the same issue as this young man? Maybe before we jump on a thread about a very sensitve issue just maybe we should read a bit more and get to know the poster becasue if this young man has a chance of a normal life, what you guys are complaining about because of your problem, a few of the posts on here will just help this young man have a problem forever instead of having a chance at getting better!

[litopita Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close litopita]

Ok before I answer the other stuff let's get back to UKGuy, the original poster on this thread. Some of you were so nice to jump in here and tell this guy that you have the same thing he has. Really? Do you know what he has? Have you read all his other posts or were you just glad that you found another guy with the "same" issue as you so you couldn't wait to get on here and comiserate. Let me tell you about UKGuy as I have been reading his posts for along time.

UKGuy is a younger man,I do beleive in his late 20's that has never had a girlfriend.Why? Well maybe he's afraid of being rejected.Maybe he's shy. Maybe he doesn't even like girls. Maybe he doesn't mind living a single life . There is nothing wrong with any of that is there? He told his dad that his dick doesn't work. Since that time he has gone to at least 3 doctors that I can recall, 2 of which were specialists, and they all came to the same conclusion; his problem is mental. His father,the man who knows him and loves him the most, and his doctors who know him far better than anyone here and have examined him, all told him he must get therapy and at least go out and try to have a date. Those that know him the best gave him the best advice.
So he comes here at times for what? To get away from what he should be trying to cure in his life, to vent and maybe find someone else that has the "same problem". When he finds that here I'm sure it sets him back on his attempt to become healed. Hey my dad and doctors are wrong because I can come to the pegym and find guys that have the same issues I have and it's because of nerve damage, a venous leak, or whatever.Regardless of the fact that he has had every test in the book that says he's fine so us here, well intention but uniformed, will give him a forum to undo all the good that is trying to be done for this young man. So do you other guys really have the same issue as this young man? Maybe before we jump on a thread about a very sensitve issue just maybe we should read a bit more and get to know the poster becasue if this young man has a chance of a normal life, what you guys are complaining about because of your problem, a few of the posts on here will just help this young man have a problem forever instead of having a chance at getting better!

^^ This post just got raped. Sorry, I meant repped

Just do it baby...

[Tesla.86 Member Find all posts View Profile Close Tesla.86]

Well like i said, there is the possiblity, that he has some serious mental issues, but the thing is, what he describes sounds pretty familar to me, for my self i can say i had good realtionships before and onenightstands and backdoor parties and so on until my accident happend. When my "drive" was away i forced my self, i was looking to more hot girls, at first i thought i just need harder better stuff dont know, was more "disrespectful" to woman, i just asked them, if they would like to do it - and they did.. But NOTHING, no feeling at all down there. Its so frustrating, iam still good looking and when iam out and girls smile at me i first smile back and then iam really pissed of about myself.

This desease i call, is just destroying yourself...

Ill hope i get in contact with UKguy to figure out what he does have like me.

And like i said iam going to have Sonography and EMG in february and then well see.

Fact for myself iam not 100% sure if the Dorsal nerve is directly damaged, or is it due to the restricted bloodflow to my glans which is most of the time cold and more purple/blueish than red and then the nervecell on the surface died. Or both has been happend.

Fact - did damage to myself. IF its possible to make it visible is an another point, caused by the limits of medical technology, but that doenst mean its no possible to have damage done just by a few jelq or pulls etc. IT IS possible. I was pretty ruff, sure, but not like that i could believe to damage some nerves inside of it when the skin is still intact, iam the living truth.

[CUSP82 Administrator Admin of the Month Dec 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close CUSP82]

Okay now to the other part, the part where because my dick works I don't understand what it's like. My mom was blind in one eye from birth but it never stopped her from raising a family. Many years later she went totally blind and that still never stopped her from doing what she wanted to do and needed to do. She still had a zest for life,wanted to accomplish things and did many things although it did take her longer. Later on she had a leg amputated, a stroke that paralyzed the other leg, and was wheelchair bound. She never changed her outlook or what she wanted to do; she was still fun to be around. She still did not only what she wanted to do but what was needed to do as well. She never stopped and never pitied herself.

Now when I read about you guys that no longer function you say I have no compassion, I don't understand because I am not down that road. If that's the case what am I doing here? I know I came for the cookies! I have been reading and trying to help guys like you for years. Hey sometimes maybe I don't give out the greatest advice but I do try.

I hear things that you say, lack of libido and no energy to do things. Well libido can be affected by many things but it really has no realtion to having your dick get hard. Libido is from hormones and if you dick doesn't get hard well your testes are still cranking away aren't they? Besides that there are many other metablolic disturbances that can cause hormaonal changes that affect libido, thyroid issues being one. When you guys tell me that you don't feel like getting out of bed or doing anything fun that is depression, not loss of libido.But it is easier to say isn't it? It is so much easier to say the reason I don't like doing things is because my dick doesn't work. Of all the guys I have spoken to through the years I would easily say that 90% or more of ed on this forum is truely psycogenic in origin. I have read their posts and the stress, the depression, the anxiety can easily be seen if one has an open mind. The biggest shots I take around here is whenI tell a guy that the problem is in their head and not in their dick. Man they want to kill me for that one. One thing they do seem to have in comon is they have had some type of accident to their dick that caused it. They jelqed one time the wrong way,the hung a volkwagen off their dick, etc etc etc. I had a lot of fights when I was younger ( still have a few now but they're usually here). My dick has been punched, kicked, yanked, grabbed and ripped, kneed, stomped on ( along with the rest of me) and you know what? It still works. When I come on here, knowing what I have been through and reading all I have yes I am a bit skeptical. One wrong jelq, as one guy did, has giving him a life as you caalled it of torture. Nope I don't buy that. The human body is a pretty damn tough machine. Am I compassionate about your issues? Sure but I want to help as well and my experience tell me to help the way I help.

I thank God that I still have my legs,my arms, I can see and hear. If I had to lose something then let my dick fall off but let me keep the rest of me. I won't get depressed but rather thankful of what I still have. To say to me how horrible it is to not function and how life is not worth living and I have no fun anymore or no desire to do things because of that well to that I say bullshit. Can you still walk? Can you hear and see? Can you speak and curse a jerk like me out? Yes you can and to tell me that life is no fun because your dick doesn't wwork just makes me think how lucky I am that my arms work,my legs and so on. There are many guys whos dick works but would gladly give it away if only they could walk again, or see someone they love, or be able to tell someome they love that they do love them,to hold and comfort a crying child because they are blind, or cannot speak, or can't walk. The fact that you guys can still do that means , at least to me, that your denying all the good things to focus solely on the bad. That's not life as Iknow it!

[Tesla.86 Member Find all posts View Profile Close Tesla.86]

CUSP i really really get you.

Maybe you get me the wrong way, i still make the best out of my life, and i really admit that i got some sort of depression but an different one, man i was at so many doctors and they all say im "fine" but i tell you this is not an condition, not being able to sleep most of the time, getting ice cold hands the whole time, brain focus not working, still doing crazy difficult mathematics but with huge effort.

I am not any kind of asshole or somethign like that, i helped and still help so many other ones, i ve been grown up to show respect to everyone, and respect is the key to everything, i believe my condition will get better when iam finishing now with my school and getting an job, it will make it just a bit easier for me, but i tell you, i would way more loose any other part of my body. Or better, i would say i dont need any woman in my life, i just want to get real horny again, to get the power out of it to get the eager and power to do all my other things i enjoyed in my life. What i miss is my focus and concentration and drive, but ill tell you i did it get out of pleasure and love. Man i tell you i had so nice woman and really nice times with them. But now its just, you dont have even power for love, its so difficult to describe, the FIRE is out, empty, lost.

I just cant chill, iam so under power whole time, like someone is holding an gun onto my head for nearly 8 years. I was always hard to myself forsure and got all signs of an really heavy burnout, but what would be great when you are stressed out, hey iam sitting here, came from school learing for hours, and could go out right now and pick up some nice girls and hang out, but there is an problem...

I was often thinking about thyroid and adrenals and stuff like that. But they are all fine. My mind is screaming for pleasure and it doenst get it, like the good years before if i did not masturbate i couldnt sleep eather.

Ill stay here in that forum, and when in the next years a miricale should happen ill tell you here. I will get on with my life, i will never give up as before, but it hurts so such as such a young man, especially when you know you normally would be able to live and FEEL all your dreams, and the only thing which destroyed you was a shortfused pull on your best friend and life-giver.

I wish this to nobody even my worst enemies, never.

[needingalift Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close needingalift]

CUSP, I initially zeroed in on this thread because UKGuy's symptoms looked very similar to my own and I'm sure deepak and tesla did the same. Regardless of UKGuy's previous posts, I think we should at least take him seriously because I know for a FACT that my penile numbness (to which he also refers) is not a mental issue - this is just what the docs and uro's tell you when they can't find the answers!!! I've had 22 years of 'specialists' using either guesswork or dismissing everything as 'psychological' so if someone is a bit sceptical of their diagnoses and wants to pursue matters further then I can personally empathise with him.

Regarding the rest of what you write then okay, if I had to choose between ED and having my legs amputated I'd stick with my ED thank you very much. Point taken, I can see your logic, but does it really all reduce down to this? If it's simply a case of folks telling others how lucky they are then I suppose I could go into the Premature Ejaculation section and tell them to stop complaining because they can at least have sex whereas I can't! And then I could turn my attention to all those who are insecure about their 7-inch dicks and want 8.5" instead but no ... the last thing you need with an issue of any kind is for someone to minimise its importance, and if an individual is taking the time and trouble to post his problem on a forum then it's definitely a problem for him, regardless of whether you personally feel you could cope with it.

Anyway, you may or may not be proven right re. UKGuy, CUSP. I have not read all his past history, as I said earlier, but I wouldn't just dismiss all this stuff as being in his mind. Sure, your dick has been through a lot if it's been kicked, kneed, stamped on and all the rest but anyone who follows or practices sport will know that it's often the more innocuous incidents that can do the most profound damage. I really don't know why somebody would claim they caused an injury by jelqing if they didn't so I'm assuming he's at least telling us what happened to the best of his knowledge.

TBH, this whole business can drive you crazy at times and depression is an almost inevitable by-product for any medium/long-term ED sufferer. Unfortunately, once you mention you're depressed everyone jumps in with the 'psychological' verdict but even if you could cure the depression you'd still be left with the initial ED so I don't think we should confuse the cause and effect here and just tell sufferers to 'cheer up'. If you think 90% of ED cases are psychogenic, CUSP, then I would have to differ with you on this.

[Robin1977 Member Find all posts View Profile Close Robin1977]

Mention to the psychiatrist that you hear voices.

[CUSP82 Administrator Admin of the Month Dec 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close CUSP82]

CUSP i really really get you.

Maybe you get me the wrong way, i still make the best out of my life, and i really admit that i got some sort of depression but an different one, man i was at so many doctors and they all say im "fine" but i tell you this is not an condition, not being able to sleep most of the time, getting ice cold hands the whole time, brain focus not working, still doing crazy difficult mathematics but with huge effort.

I am not any kind of asshole or somethign like that, i helped and still help so many other ones, i ve been grown up to show respect to everyone, and respect is the key to everything, i believe my condition will get better when iam finishing now with my school and getting an job, it will make it just a bit easier for me, but i tell you, i would way more loose any other part of my body. Or better, i would say i dont need any woman in my life, i just want to get real horny again, to get the power out of it to get the eager and power to do all my other things i enjoyed in my life. What i miss is my focus and concentration and drive, but ill tell you i did it get out of pleasure and love. Man i tell you i had so nice woman and really nice times with them. But now its just, you dont have even power for love, its so difficult to describe, the FIRE is out, empty, lost.

I just cant chill, iam so under power whole time, like someone is holding an gun onto my head for nearly 8 years. I was always hard to myself forsure and got all signs of an really heavy burnout, but what would be great when you are stressed out, hey iam sitting here, came from school learing for hours, and could go out right now and pick up some nice girls and hang out, but there is an problem...

I was often thinking about thyroid and adrenals and stuff like that. But they are all fine. My mind is screaming for pleasure and it doenst get it, like the good years before if i did not masturbate i couldnt sleep eather.

Ill stay here in that forum, and when in the next years a miricale should happen ill tell you here. I will get on with my life, i will never give up as before, but it hurts so such as such a young man, especially when you know you normally would be able to live and FEEL all your dreams, and the only thing which destroyed you was a shortfused pull on your best friend and life-giver.

I wish this to nobody even my worst enemies, never.

No you're not an asshole but when you read what you have written you don't see the stress? School, work, life, etc? You don't think that maybe everything is ganging up on you along with a bit of depression?

[Tesla.86 Member Find all posts View Profile Close Tesla.86]

I readed that one an everything became clear, its like i said, CUSP, jeah its depression but it has a reason, its not the cause.

History of narcissism - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Read please what Freud says, my words..

Freud regarded all libidinous drives as fundamentally sexual......

[CUSP82 Administrator Admin of the Month Dec 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close CUSP82]

CUSP, I initially zeroed in on this thread because UKGuy's symptoms looked very similar to my own and I'm sure deepak and tesla did the same. Regardless of UKGuy's previous posts, I think we should at least take him seriously because I know for a FACT that my penile numbness (to which he also refers) is not a mental issue - this is just what the docs and uro's tell you when they can't find the answers!!! I've had 22 years of 'specialists' using either guesswork or dismissing everything as 'psychological' so if someone is a bit sceptical of their diagnoses and wants to pursue matters further then I can personally empathise with him.

Regarding the rest of what you write then okay, if I had to choose between ED and having my legs amputated I'd stick with my ED thank you very much. Point taken, I can see your logic, but does it really all reduce down to this? If it's simply a case of folks telling others how lucky they are then I suppose I could go into the Premature Ejaculation section and tell them to stop complaining because they can at least have sex whereas I can't! And then I could turn my attention to all those who are insecure about their 7-inch dicks and want 8.5" instead but no ... the last thing you need with an issue of any kind is for someone to minimise its importance, and if an individual is taking the time and trouble to post his problem on a forum then it's definitely a problem for him, regardless of whether you personally feel you could cope with it.

Anyway, you may or may not be proven right re. UKGuy, CUSP. I have not read all his past history, as I said earlier, but I wouldn't just dismiss all this stuff as being in his mind. Sure, your dick has been through a lot if it's been kicked, kneed, stamped on and all the rest but anyone who follows or practices sport will know that it's often the more innocuous incidents that can do the most profound damage. I really don't know why somebody would claim they caused an injury by jelqing if they didn't so I'm assuming he's at least telling us what happened to the best of his knowledge.

TBH, this whole business can drive you crazy at times and depression is an almost inevitable by-product for any medium/long-term ED sufferer. Unfortunately, once you mention you're depressed everyone jumps in with the 'psychological' verdict but even if you could cure the depression you'd still be left with the initial ED so I don't think we should confuse the cause and effect here and just tell sufferers to 'cheer up'. If you think 90% of ED cases are psychogenic, CUSP, then I would have to differ with you on this.

First off I have read UKGuys post for at least 2 years. He is in therapy but therapy not only takes time but the person has to want to get help. Maybe this guy just doesn't want it for whatever reason.

They did a study a few years back in the US about back pain. 32% of the back pain has no physical origin whatsoever. What it roughly means is that the doctors in the study could not find a single physical cause for the patients pain. They took radiographs, ct scans, MRI's and still found nothing physically wrong yet these patients still complain of pain. I think the study was done in either 2003 or 2004 so we are talking about state of the art medicine and not 1940's medicine. Now if you're the doctor and these people want you to relieve their pain how do you fix them? They tell you to fix what is wrong and yet you can't see anyting wrong so how do you fix them? What do you tell them other than that there is nothing that can be found wrong with your back. Does it allevaite their pain? No these people have pain but yet nothing is wrong. The study concluded that although limits of technology may account for 3-5 % of pain from physical issues that cannot be detected within the limits of the technology that was used it does not account for such a large disparity therefore they must conclude that the pain is psycogenic in origin. You cannot tell these people they don't have pain; they do but there is no physical cause for it.

Now as far as ed is presented on this forum I have read hundreds of posts over the years of guys like yourself that have gone to specialist and have been told nothing is physically wrong with them. I'm not talking about the guys on here who say they have ed but have never seen a doctor. We live in a pretty modern technical age and medicine is pretty advanced even compared to 10 years ago so when I read so many guys who urologist say there is nothing wrong physically with them but yet they say their dick doesn't work what am I to conclude? What would you conclude? Okay let's say I have read 100 post and as with the back study I will say that 3-5% cannot be diagnnosed due to limits in technology but what do I say to the other 95%?

[CUSP82 Administrator Admin of the Month Dec 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close CUSP82]

One thing I do want to say to telsa and needingalift. You two guys have by far conducted a conversation about ths issue in an informative, non hostile, conversive manner which will lead to a much greater discussion and understanding by all. Usually by this time the guys who have this problem have already called me and asshole and I should go somewhere to rot and die. You guys are great.

[UKGuy Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close UKGuy]

i don't know what to say anymore I do want to improve my situation but I feel so lost. I'm seeing a counselor next month and I'm not really sure if it will solve anything they have put me on trazodone which hasn't done anything in my opiopn (I have been taking it for over a month) except give me some weak morning erections but I am giving it time. The first session I told the man about my ed how yes everything he is convinced it's purely mental. My assessment report said I showed some signs of Psychosis and Bipolar I guess further sessions will explore this.

CUSP82 you are right there is more to life than our penises I have read about guys who became completely impotent taking Propecia or having an accident of some kind and yet they still get through it unfortunately some do kill themselves and I can understand why I think any guy with persistent ED can tell you how devastating it is.

What frustrates me the most is my erection quality isn't consistent. For example they're often pretty weak (kind of used to it after so many years) but now and again i'll get a good erection, like the other day I did some reverse kegels just to try and relax my pelvic floor my erections were better much harder and I kept getting semi erections through out the day which hasn't happened in a while for a brief moment I felt everything was back to normal. Then the next day my erection is back to it's usual state again weak and abysmal, lifeless. I remember I used to do kegels years ago and my erections improved now they don't really seem to work and they even make my penis weaker. I don't get it maybe my pc muscle is damaged or something. Plus reading about Venous Leaks is depressing in it self as it doesn't really have a cure although some guys think it doesn't even exist. CUSP82 if your penis really went through all that abuse I can't understand how me jelqing slightly erect and stretching my dick would destroy it I never even felt any discomfort when all this happened 10 years ago.

Maybe I just need a long time to recover no kegels or masturbation even I'm just scared about possible penile atrophy if I leave my dick alone for too long as I don't get many erections really unless I watch porn or something otherwise it's like I have no libido, I can't remember the last time I felt genuinely horny and had a rock hard erection.

I'm pretty unsure of everything at the moment. Sometimes I feel like I'm losing grip on reality having some identity issues recently. I do agree that part of this is probably psychological.