EQ loss for 2+ days after ejaculation

[mongovonraven Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close mongovonraven]

Alright, here's my situation. After being in a 12yr relationship, I've been single for over a year and have made out with a few different girls in that time, but not been able to maintain an erection or had a meaningful sexual experience for a number of possible reasons (alcohol, anxiety, lack of physical stimulation). i've been doing kegels, taken supplements (l-argninine, ginkgo biloba, etc) and other exercises to help with my EQ, as well as cut back my masturbation to around once a week. I've noticed that it takes me around 2 days to recover after masturbating. that is to say that I can get an erection (through lengthy masturbation or morning wood), but it takes alot of work and I know that in a real situation where I might need it, it wouldn't be there. How can i improve my recovery time after ejaculation? i've been in situations where I've built myself up for up to 10 days, couldn't take it any more, masturbated, and then met a girl the next night, and been unable to perform. is this just poor timing? how long is a normal recovery period after ejaculation? do I have ED? Should I get a prescription?

any advice, from anybody, would be much appreciated! thanks dudes!!!

[mongovonraven Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close mongovonraven]

also, I'm 37, and have been experiencing similar problems for about 3 years (including the last 2 years of my 12yr relationship). I'm well aware that the problem may be psychological and I just need to relax, but when you're with a new woman (the only new woman you've been with in over 12 years), anxieties have a way of fucking with your head...

[needingalift Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close needingalift]

Mongovonraven, is your sex drive normal?

I ask this because what you have written is almost a carbon copy of my own experiences between 32 and 34 years old, so even our ages are similar. If it's taking you two full days to recover from masturbating then there could well be a libido issue here. I also spent a couple of years looking for women but was then unable to perform once I'd found them. As strange as this now sounds, I realised after a while that I was not actually seeking women out of lust but out of sheer habit, simply because that's what I'd always done!

Please disregard this if it doesn't pertain to you but I just thought I'd mention it in the hope it might be useful.

[mongovonraven Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close mongovonraven]

pretty sure its not a libido issue. Although I know its what it use to be back in my 20's. i could be completely attracted to a lady and want to get with her. I'll usually initially get an erection while making out, but it more often than not fades away before we get too heavy.

[bautista19 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close bautista19]

It's anxiety. You are thinking about your penis too much.

[mongovonraven Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close mongovonraven]

Ok. I think you're right saying anxiety is probably the main problem. but i can't help but wonder if there are other physical/chemical problems that initially caused my anxiety about performance in the first place. Its like the "what came 1st, the chicken or the egg?" conundrum. Is anxiety a cause or an effect? I really started to notice changes in my EQ and libido when I was about 31. 6 years later, I'm single again, and have no clue if I'll be able to perform or not when I meet a new lady. And I truly appreciate your advice so far, but I still don't know how to deal with these anxieties, especially if I suspect an underlying physical/chemical cause? How do I fix this?