Newbie to PE, ready to improve my unit/confidence/sex life!

[gingernuts Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close gingernuts]

Hi everyone,

I've lurked here for about 2 weeks so far - I like to respect forums I join by using the search function a lot before posting.

Here's my story in a nutshell:

25 years old, with a fairly average sized erect dick (somebody tell me if that word is frowned upon) at 6.4" BPEL and 4.7" EG.

It's got a left curve and a baseball bat kind of shape. I can see the right-hand CC is in good order, it only bends over because the left is out of shape. The left-hand CC is kind of weak and thin at the very base (I think it's from years of hiding erections directly to the left in my pants as a kid!), and as a result the blood all goes to the top, which bulges out a bit wider than the glans. Also consequently my erect penis does flop to the left pretty easily, especially when i'm on my back, and never feels the best it could during sex (to me) because it's bending to left inside the girl.

As a result I've had to get close to girls before I'm OK sleeping with them. The trouble being, most girls I get involved with want to sleep with me way too quickly for me!! I've only had 1 sexual partner, and we were together for 2 years. She said I was amazing in bed and she loved giving me handjobs and blowjobs, and actually told me she liked my penis - so it's more of a personal hurdle I've got to overcome.

After that though she abused my trust and since then I've not gotten close enough to sleep with anyone else because of a run of anxiety episodes - either the spark fizzles out because they lose patience, or I've protected my own pride by breaking it off first (which has probably hurt a few girls' feelings, and I feel bad about, and have made an effort to stop doing and apologised to the girls I did it to). As a result I know I've lost out on a few good potential relationships, probably between 7-10.

So that's why I'm here - to improve my EQ, straighten up, grow a bit, and remove that mental barrier so that the next time I meet a nice girl I can give her exactly what she wants (and I want) rather than an awkward conversation and a few weeks of frustration!

So my goals are, in order:
1) correct the curve, not only by pulling my penis straight but at the same time filling out that bottom portion of the left CC.
2) add a bit of girth all the way along, at least to 5"
3) add a bit of length, at least to 7"
4) improve EQ all over, so that I know I can perform
5) reduce/eliminate masturbation to porn, train my brain to go for the real thing again (yourbrainonporn is a great resource for that)

(I'm more focussed on goal 1 at the expense of goals 2 and 3. I'd rather have a straight penis than a larger, but still curved one, if that helps anyone in giving me advice.)

All those put together are my plans for improving my confidence, my interactions with girls and therefore my quality of life.

I'll be making question threads in order to draw from the experience of members who've accomplished my own goals, and in return I'll be contributing where I can and documenting my own progress in order to give back to the community.

So if you've read this far, thank you! Thank you for the site, thanks to each of you for the contributions you've made that I've already lurked around, and let's crack on!

I've got to go out now, but when I'm back I'll find out how posting photos works and start some sort of progress thread. I've already got my routine together, but I'll be open to advice.

Love you all,
gingernuts

[MrB8 Senior Member Member of the Month Nov 2013 Find all posts View Profile Close MrB8]

to the Gym gingernuts!


Don't miss this thread!!

https://www.pegym.com/forums/penis-e...t-mindset.html

And if you haven't already done so, please READ THIS, as well as the articles in the topmost blue navigation bar, and pay attention to safety instructions.

1- https://www.pegym.com/forums/introdu...tml#post515157

https://www.pegym.com/forums/womans-...eal-penis.html

https://www.pegym.com/forums/womans-...-straight.html

https://www.pegym.com/forums/penis-e...nis-101-a.html

2,3,4 - When done correctly, PE will greatly improve your penile health and increase your EQ, in addition to size gains, but you need to be consistent, patient and persistent, please do as much research as you can, ask questions, follow safety and exercise instructions carefully and remember that PE is a long term process, don't rush it up.


5- Therapeutic Help For Porn Addiction

The Detraining Effect: Understanding and Reversing Negative Habits To Improve Erection Quality and Sexual Confidence: Part 1

https://www.pegym.com/forums/erectil...-erection.html


Starting a journal in the progress forum is a good idea, to track your progress and get feedback, also for motivation!

I recommend following a beginner's manual routine for at least 90 days or until you stop gaining - whichever comes last. Most members here start with JP90, and gain fine from it, being an intense beginner's routine, you may want to consider starting slow and gradually increase workload!


Pay attention to your PIs, your penis is trying to tell you if you are over working, or you are in the growth zone, aim for positive PIs, and steer away from the negative ones.

Physiologic Indicators (PIs) to Help Penis Growth!

Helpful jelqing Information


Stamina exercises contribute to EQ, penile health and gains, I suggest you read through the Premature Ejaculation Forum and follow a balanced regular and reverse kegels routine for optimum pelvic floor health and conditioning, as well as practice Edging for more stamina and control.


Your starting size is just fine, you are probably feel bad about it because of porn, you have nothing to be anxious about, and your goals are very realistic and attainable, don't base your confidence on your penis, let it derive its power from yours, its a part of you not the other way around!


Good Luck!

[TPW Senior Member Member of the Month Oct 2013 Find all posts View Profile Close TPW]

Hiya gingernuts and welcome to the Gym!

MrB8 has provided some really great info to get you started so I just wanted to let you know that should you require it, there are also some helpful and supportive women available on the forum who are more than willing to offer their insight and wisdom. We can often be located in the following forums:

A Woman's Perspective

Relationship Forum

The Gym

Best wishes on your PE journey!

[burtybasset Retired Moderator Member of the Month May 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close burtybasset]

Welcome to the gym gingernuts!

Good to have another ginger at the gym, you are ginger aren't you?

Good luck buddy, stay safe and stay positive!

[PurpleOnes Senior Member Member of the Month June 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close PurpleOnes]

Welcome to the gym gingernuts!

Funny name you have there and hopefully your balls aren't orange.

Finally a member who has done reading by himself already.

I think besides working on your penis you need to work on your overall confidence.

I can tell from experience that PE works and you can make a big difference on how dedicated and consistent you are with your PE workouts.

I would advice to start with JP 90 routine since it is a great routine for a beginner that will condition you for more advanced exercises.

JP 90:https://www.pegym.com/forums/beginne...r-routine.html

Physiological indicators are your best friends and they will guide you with your PE journey.

They will also help you to avoid overtraining.

Physiological indicators:Physiological Indicators Are Your Best Friend

I hope that you will enjoy yourself here and don't be afraid to ask questions.

[kickinthemebs Senior Member Member of the Month Feb 2014 Find all posts View Profile Close kickinthemebs]

Welcome to the gym

[gingernuts Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close gingernuts]

Thank you all!

Thanks MrB8 for the articles and threads. Very helpful. I've been getting used to kegels for the past couple of weeks now. Still getting used to doing them flaccid, but making progress!

Thank you Passionate Wife, nice to know there's perspective and support from ladies on here too I think I'll end up needing that as a rational alternative to what my own mind tells me when I'm getting involved with a girl!

Burtybasset - yes, I am ginger. Glad the name clicked! And thanks for the welcome. Orange Power!

PurpleOnes - my balls themselves aren't orange. Can't say the same for the hair! ....do I want to know what "PurpleOnes" alludes to?! Confidence took a major hit with that relationship, but I've already come a huge way. I'm not one to have a sob story, so let's just say this is probably the final area I need to work on with it. Thanks for the support.

Thanks for the welcome kickinthemebs!

As for the advice you guys have given me:
- I've been doing the warm-up part of JP90 for the past couple of weeks, whilst I've been abroad. Not the full routine - wanted to get the holiday out the way first, and get used to the stretching etc.
- Familiar with the PIs: I made sure to read them before I did any PE whatsoever. Better to know them before you need to know them, right!
- I cut out porn altogether and completely cut out masturbation 2 weeks ago. Just with those, my EQ and sensitivity improved a lot. (I've since masturbated, not to porn, and it's been like getting to know my dick all over again)
- I know it's a long process, and consistency/seeing things through has historically been my weak point, hence why I thought making a journal thread would keep me motivated and accountable too.

Anyway I'll cover most of those in the progress thread. Thanks again all, I already feel welcome.

[gingernuts Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close gingernuts]

Oh, one more question - does the PE Gym work on tapatalk? (android/iphone forum browsing app, for those not in the know)

[Orly193 Member Find all posts View Profile Close Orly193]

My dick is virtually the exact same, what's your base girth if it's baseball bat shaped?

[gingernuts Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close gingernuts]

Didn't ever measure the base girth Orly... One thing I noticed when getting reacquainted with my member last week is that it's only narrower when looking from the top down. That's the perspective that looks like a baseball bat. When I peer around at the side view (there's an image for you haha) my corpus spongiosum makes up for any lost girth at the base, and as it goes along the shaft it tapers up. So really the girth is more or less the same all the way along, just in different dimensions.

I can't be bothered drawing a picture, so here is the best way to describe the side view!
http://www.componentart.com/blogs/bo...leTriangle.PNG
At the left would be my body, and at the right is the tip of my penis. Obviously it doesn't make a perfect triangle shape and it's less pronounced than the picture, but you get the idea!!

Hope that helps.

[Orly193 Member Find all posts View Profile Close Orly193]

Ah, I get you, and when you say abused your trust I'm assuming you mean cheated?

[gingernuts Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close gingernuts]

Yeah, in a sense. We never actually went "official" even though we'd been exclusive for the past 3 years. Lost our virginity to each other, did everything together, went places together, went round to each other's for christmas dinner etc. Then she started seeing other guys, one night stands etc and telling me about them and what she was doing with them, and after a while I said ok I can't hack this, it's either me or them, no hard feelings either way and let's still be friends.
At that point she started hiding what she was doing and where she was going on the weekends, lying to me about what she'd been up to, hooking up with guys in clubs without realising I was in the same room, and us meeting up as friends would turn into her telling me she loved me and trying to sleep with me again. In the end she wanted both the loving sex with me and the one night stands with strangers in clubs and wouldn't choose one over the other, so I had to make the decision for her and get myself out the situation. Hardest thing I've had to do in my life, accepting I'd lost the girl I loved and my best friend in one go.

So yeah, I could never call it cheating because it's partly my fault for not ever committing to her, but she definitely wasn't a good friend at all towards the end (hence careful wording of "abused my trust") and it messed up my perceptions of myself, self image, self assuredness, what girls are like etc for a long long time. It's at least partly the reason I get anxious whenever I've been with girls since then.

Sorry for the long explanation (and it's not a sob story!!) but even though we aren't on speaking terms any more, I still wouldn't ever accuse her of cheating when she technically didn't.

[John_Clark Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close John_Clark]

- I've been doing the warm-up part of JP90 for the past couple of weeks, whilst I've been abroad. Not the full routine - wanted to get the holiday out the way first, and get used to the stretching etc.

Welcome! Just so you understand, the stretches are not part of the warm-up. They are a lengthening exercise!!

[gingernuts Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close gingernuts]

My mistake, I missed the distinction first time round Thank you.

[GeeMox Retired Moderator Member of the Month April 2015PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close GeeMox]

to the Gym Gingernuts, enjoy your time here and have a safe PE journey.