Possible to heal abuse?

[Red Fox Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Red Fox]

Years ago I was sexual abused. I have coped with the psychological trauma, and I have internally forgiven the abuser.

Is it possible to non-surgically heal an enlarged urethra opening?

Is it possible to heal bruises on the foreskin?

[midasman1974 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close midasman1974]

YES! I was abused as a child, so i know you can be physically and emotionally healed.

I cannot promise perfection, but I am always amazed at what our wonderful body can do when repairing itself! I would suggest Bio-Oil( lotion area, cosmetic aisle at Wal-mart). It helps a lot with scar tissue and skin discolorations. Apply after bathing. Some results in several weeks, with noticable results in a few months.

As for the enlarged urethra opening, this may be more difficult. Have you visited with a urologist about this? The urethra is actually a pretty large tube naturally, except for the last 1 inch or so, perhaps some minor surgery (sounds awful, I know). Many state governments have funds set aside for surgery to correct physical abuse - so check into it!

You CAN heal physically from sexual abuse, the emotional abuse is the most difficult thing.

Welcome to PeGym! You will find many very caring, very helpful people here! Message me if you need to chat .

[kingpole Retired ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close kingpole]

I would see a doctor about the physical repairs. And congrats on the ability to forgive that takes a big man to do so.

[Red Fox Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Red Fox]

Thanks guys,

I'll get some oil, and visit a urologist.

[midasman1974 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close midasman1974]

When I said "minor surgery" to correct your stretched urethra, here's what I meant:

The surgery is probably an outpatient procedure, perhaps taking 20 minutes (plus prep and anethsesia), so you'll be out if the hospital the same afternoon. The most bothersome part of this will be a catheter tube that will have to stay in for a couple weeks. This is because urine would not allow the surgical wound / stitches to heal. The catheter will be really annoying.

But for the most part, perhaps 6 or 10 stitches will make it much better - not perfect, but better. 10 stitches is nothing!

[Red Fox Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Red Fox]

"That which does not kill us makes us stronger."

Thanks for those details.

The idea of (trusting someone to perform) surgery frightens me.. the damage is no more than 2 - 3mm, so I'm not yet sure I would opt for surgery if it ends up being the only option.

I've been mentally preparing myself for the possibility that I may have to accept it as it is. It is not really the aesthetics that bother me as much as it is the physical reminder of that painful chapter of my life. I've been applying mental techniques which are helping end the flashbacks when I notice the damage. I'm sure that someday soon this will not be remembered.

[midasman1974 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close midasman1974]

You have tremendous courage to seek solutions for this. Many victims of sexual and other abuse stare at the scars and other evidence and insist on remaining a victim, as though they feel nothing can be done -- that they are ruined forever. You have apparently chosen to see what can be salvaged and move forward!

The good news is you can do some PE exercises here, as you can avoid any abrasions or stress to the glans head while it heals. No guarantees, but improving your erection quality (called 'EQ' on this forum) may make a real difference: A firmer erection, pushing from all directions around your uretha opening, may close the gap somewhat.

Write down your questions for the Urologist and take them with you to your appointment!! It is easy to clam up or get so focused on one thing, that you may leave the appointment and an hour later say, "Oh, dang! I forgot to ask about...." It may also be helpful when scheduling the appointment to say upfront that you have some physical damage from abuse and will need some real time with the doc.

Again, I applaud your courage to move ahead and heal!

[Red Fox Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Red Fox]

Thank you so much for the encouragement, it means a lot to me

I'll learn and do the exercises, and write down my questions.

K+ to ya!

[midasman1974 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close midasman1974]

Bump

[Wantmorebulge Member Find all posts View Profile Close Wantmorebulge]

Years ago I was sexual abused. I have coped with the psychological trauma, and I have internally forgiven the abuser.

Is it possible to non-surgically heal an enlarged urethra opening?

Is it possible to heal bruises on the foreskin?

Hi Red Fox. I was abused too at an early age.

I can't add anything more to what the others have said about seeing a urologist. They will be more understanding that you may realise.

On the psychological trauma, I tried to forgive my abuser, but I'm not sure if I ever properly will. What did help me was focusing my time on doing things that would never let such a thing happen again, to me or to others. This drove me to learn how to fight, to get really strong, to learn what I can, and do as best as I can in life. I don't know how many of these things really make a difference these days, as what it really came down to was I was a little lad who was terrified of what could happen if I didn't go along with things, and he was a sick man who knew exactly how to manipulate situations. Working on making myself a better person did make me feel a lot better about myself and gave me lots of confidence. It was kind of a way for me to know that I had overcome the damage of what had been done.

I have some small physical scars which although I can't see, I know are there and I can feel sometimes when I think about it. Years ago, if I felt those scars, it could send me into lots of bad thoughts for days afterwards, but a hypnotist / NLP guy helped me out so that whenever I think of my scars, I think of how strong I have become as a man since it happened, and how I have changed completely since then and how much stronger I have become both physically and mentally. Let me know if there is anything I can do to help with this. It took me a long time but slowly I got there.

I know what you mean about worries in seeing a urologist. I had to have a prostate exam not so long ago, and the thought of it made me put it off for a very long time. I had to have it done, and I spoke to the doc before hand and he really put my mind to rest - its a medical thing, thats all.

I wish you the best in fixing any physical damage so you can free yourself from the bad thoughts. If the damage cant be fixed, remember that you may not be able to forget about what they mean to you, but you can change how you think about what they mean.

Best wishes.