Attitude you have on women (submissive or dominating) and Pre E

[stoppe Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close stoppe]

I have been thinking about this for a while because i firmly believe Premature Ejaculation is, in the majority of cases, a psychological issue and one of stress.

What do we most think about when we fear of Premature Ejaculation? That we will disappoint the woman and that she will be angry and frustrated. I think this is crucial because anticipation of anger creates a lot of stress and tension.

But anticipating anger is not enough. It depends on what your rapport to the angered person is which ultimately will or will not lead to consequences. Is the person above you or below you?

For example, if you punish a child because he was an idiot and he deserved the punishment, the child may become angry on you because he/she is frustrated. But that anger will not have an impact on you because you are in power/charge and you get no consequences from his anger. So in this case even IF the child gets angry, it doesn't really matter. Because it's ultimately about power/control.

Now onto Premature Ejaculation and women. Premature Ejaculation is an insecurity issue. Looking at myself and so many other men like me (mostly insecure), i can't help but notice there is so much tension about disappointing a woman when you Premature Ejaculation. But the interesting part is Premature Ejaculation rarely if ever happens when you watch porn/masturbate because there you are on complete control.

This would logically lead to the conclusion that something is off when a woman comes into the picture and the problem would be how you position yourself relative to her.

Is she equal to you? Below you? Or above you? Because you can't be in control of a person that is above you or equal to you. Leaving all the political correctness aside, we are animals after all and sex is about power and submission.

In my case I can safely say that in all the cases I had Premature Ejaculation i did not feel above the woman but equal and usually below her. I felt i had to perform to please her and keep her from getting angry at me if I didn't.

I felt i don't have control over her. Not over my ejaculation. I felt she was above me and she was dominating me, not vice versa. I felt like I was leading her but that i was reacting to her. (and being reactive is a submissive stance).

Basically I almost always felt I react to the woman rather than make the woman react to me. I was not leading or dominating but reacting and being submissive to her needs. Her needs were first, mine were almost non-existent. And this priority of needs is what is relevant for power dynamics. If your needs matter less and you are more concerned about meeting the other's needs, you are lower in rank/power etc. You are the one being submissive, and she is the one leading.

This would translate to my day to day life as well, when I didn't feel I can lead women, take charge etc but I was more concerned on pleasing her. And scared if she had a temper... basically pleasing her to avoid bad tempers. I also believed I can never be above a woman because it is disrespectful to her.


What are your thoughts on this?

[Anklepain Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Anklepain]

I have had sex with the fat chick. I think she was about 150kg. She was fat as fuck. She is noway equal or above me. Still 1 thrust and im done.

Other girl was a virgin small girl. She let me lead almost everywhere and everything. She didnt know shit about sex. Still 1 thrust and thats it.

And many many more...

[incogneeetoe Moderator Member of the Month Sept 2017*Special Appreciated Moderator Nov. 2021* PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close incogneeetoe]

Couple of thoughts:

1. The use of the acronym PE is confusing. If you look at the top of the page, you will see name of this place is PEGym. The "PE" is generally used as an acronym for Penis Enlargement or Penis Exercise. You are using it for, I assume, Premature Ejaculation. Best to make that more clear.

2. There is often a psychological component to PreE, but that is not the only thing. Many guys do experience it with masturbation, including me.

3. I have always perceived myself as equal. And depending on the situation, I either lead or follow or am at the side. In bed with the wife, I lead. But I want to please her. She is always please (orgasm each time...only a few instances of no orgasm in 10+ years). And yet I still experience PreE.

[stoppe Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close stoppe]

Good points, i just assumed that since this is the Premature Ejaculation subtopic, that's what PE will mean, but you are right, PE here will always be associated with Penis Enlargement/exercises cause this is what the forum is about.

I replaced PE with Premature Ejaculation in the text but i can't edit the title. Could you as a mod do that please?

I would be interested in mainly what goes through your mind if you think she is not pleased or you fail to please her properly. Also, what goes though your mind when she gets frustrated.

Also, do you experience PreE in masturbation at the same rate as in sex or less?

[stoppe Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close stoppe]

I have had sex with the fat chick. I think she was about 150kg. She was fat as fuck. She is noway equal or above me. Still 1 thrust and im done.

Other girl was a virgin small girl. She let me lead almost everywhere and everything. She didnt know shit about sex. Still 1 thrust and thats it.

And many many more...

But what do you think of or feel if the woman gets frustrated?

[IdealPenis Senior Member Member of the Month Feb 2019 Find all posts View Profile Close IdealPenis]

You are onto something.

You can study more about the psychological causes of premature ejaculation.
There are plenty of studies and psychotherapy case studies on this.

However, not all cases of premature ejaculation are caused by psychological 'castration'.

[not2big Senior Super ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close not2big]

Frustration occurs if you are not involved in a truly loving relationship. If she truly loves you, she should understand your situation and try and help you find ways to overcome your premature ejaculation.

I experienced it during the the first year of our relationship. But we eventually worked it out. Over the last several years, we have been struggling with my ED and have successfully found ways to decal with it.

[Anklepain Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Anklepain]

But what do you think of or feel if the woman gets frustrated?

Whe i was young i didnt truly know what is premature ejaculation because my dick is staying hard even after third ejaculation in row without any rest. Just change comdom and im ready to continue. My personal record is ejaculating 9 time in 1 day.

I have had sex with about 67-75 different women and lately thinking about these intercouse and find out almost every women i slept with, they were very wet in the first round but the second and third round they were dry or they are not enjoying. I can see in her face, bodylanguage and voice that they were not enjoying anymore in the second and third round. This have been tested with and without condom.

I believe that sperm cells have some kind of energy that women wants from a man that she like. Once she get that, there is no that sexual energy anymore.
Mission complete. Second and third round doesnt have sperm cells, only empty sperm without any cells. Even if her mind doest want to get pregnant but her body wants to. Her body wants to collect the sperm cells from a man she is having sex. This is biology perspective.

[Anklepain Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Anklepain]

But what do you think of or feel if the woman gets frustrated?

Before intercouse I didnt think anything. I just thinking that i want to fuck her. I felt so good that i would cum without intercourse. Actually i have ejaculated 2 time in my life without intercourse. 1 time i was licking her pussy and then i came without touching my penis.

After ejaculation I didnt think anything in that time. I just change comdom and continue. I felt good when cumming.

I would not be in this forum if second and third round would be sexually satifying a women. Belive me second and third round is useless.

[stoppe Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close stoppe]

Whe i was young i didnt truly know what is premature ejaculation because my dick is staying hard even after third ejaculation in row without any rest. Just change comdom and im ready to continue. My personal record is ejaculating 9 time in 1 day.

I have had sex with about 67-75 different women and lately thinking about these intercouse and find out almost every women i slept with, they were very wet in the first round but the second and third round they were dry or they are not enjoying. I can see in her face, bodylanguage and voice that they were not enjoying anymore in the second and third round. This have been tested with and without condom.

I believe that sperm cells have some kind of energy that women wants from a man that she like. Once she get that, there is no that sexual energy anymore.
Mission complete. Second and third round doesnt have sperm cells, only empty sperm without any cells. Even if her mind doest want to get pregnant but her body wants to. Her body wants to collect the sperm cells from a man she is having sex. This is biology perspective.

Yes, i too noticed that after 1st ejaculation women just lose interest. It's not that they don't enjoy it, but they're more like "meh"

I used to be able to go 2nd and even 3rd round too and last a long time then but it was not pleasurable, if anything it was frustrating.

Before intercouse I didnt think anything. I just thinking that i want to fuck her. I felt so good that i would cum without intercourse. Actually i have ejaculated 2 time in my life without intercourse. 1 time i was licking her pussy and then i came without touching my penis.

After ejaculation I didnt think anything in that time. I just change comdom and continue. I felt good when cumming.

I would not be in this forum if second and third round would be sexually satifying a women. Belive me second and third round is useless.

I feel the same, even if i could and probably still go for another round. It just doesn't feel the same for me and for the woman too.

I think this "ability" to go for 2nd round immediately is very common for people with PE and in a way they like to think it's somewhat of a "solution" (like i used to think as well) but it just isn't.

There's nothing better and more fulfilling than enjoying the first round fully with no care. Everything after feels like overcompensating

[BBC Action Senior Member Member of the Month August 2019 Find all posts View Profile Close BBC Action]

I felt so good that i would cum without intercourse. Actually i have ejaculated 2 time in my life without intercourse. 1 time i was licking her pussy and then i came without touching my penis.

How?

[TheZZMan Moderator Member of the Month Sept 2018PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close TheZZMan]

Clearly this is a discussion on premature ejaculation and has been moved to that forum.

OP, you need to begin a training regimine to rid yourself of this Pre-E scourge. Look into edging or stamina training. Read and come back with questions. Edging is so much more that stopping when you get to the point of no return. We can help you, others can help you. Open up a real dialogue about fixing this, not just stories about how you failed in the past.

[stoppe Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close stoppe]

Clearly this is a discussion on premature ejaculation and has been moved to that forum.

OP, you need to begin a training regimine to rid yourself of this Pre-E scourge. Look into edging or stamina training. Read and come back with questions. Edging is so much more that stopping when you get to the point of no return. We can help you, others can help you. Open up a real dialogue about fixing this, not just stories about how you failed in the past.

Someone moved this in the poll section, i initially submitted it there.

This is not about failing but about the type of mindset PE-ers have

[closed291 Retired ModeratorPEGym Hero Member of the Month June 2016 Find all posts View Profile Close closed291]

Someone moved this in the poll section, i initially submitted it there.

This is not about failing but about the type of mindset PE-ers have

Anytime there is a poll...the thread would be moved there.

[mypeepeeissmol:( Member Find all posts View Profile Close mypeepeeissmol:(]

I only have experience with one girl, but from a long relationship.
For me it was very simple.
1. want to please her, make her orgasm, let her lead, decide the whats and whens etc. 1-2 mins and I'm out (had times where legit 4 pumps in and I'm dead). I could go for 2nd round or even 3rd round, but (looking back) most of the times, there wasn't much excitement anymore.
2. there were times when we would argue and we would end up f*cking. and boy those were some really long and hardcore f*cks lmfao. Can confirm, in those moments I felt so much superior than her, I completely dominated her in every way, I was making and deciding the moves, she was merely a sex doll (albeit a really moany and screamy one). It's like I viewed her as a subhuman or some sh*t. It scares me a bit, actually when I think about it, but the best sex that we had was when I had this attitude + and it also proved to be the most pleasurable to her, and even ended up putting her in a few sex comas.