I cum almost instantly from porn/sex (need help)

[difatech Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close difatech]

I am 18 years old and I cum almost instantly from watching porn or from having sex. I have been watching porn for a few years now and my PE is getting worse. I used to be able to last 15 minutes while masturbating to porn and now I will instantly get a rock hard erection and cum in 30 seconds and I physically can't edge because the sensation is just too powerful to control. I have the same problem with my girlfriend where I cum within 10 seconds of her blowing me, almost cumming before she even starts. Without porn, I can masturbate for 30+ minutes without cumming barely having to edge. I have been masturbating every other day without porn for around 2 months being able to last a while, but i tested with porn and still the second i turn on porn I cum instantly. I don't think my penis is too sensitive its just that porn or a girl doing something to me triggered something in me that makes me cum instantly. This is really affecting my confidence with girls and I have to try and avoid getting in to sexual situations because it is incredibly embarrassing and its making me depressed. I eat healthy and I exercise so I don't think thats my issue. My question is what do I do? How do I get rid of this trigger that happens in my brain that makes me cum instantly? Do I completely stop masturbating all together and give my brain a reset? Or do I try and practice edging more? Any help would be greatly appreciated.

[ZeNigmar Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close ZeNigmar]

I am 18 years old and I cum almost instantly from watching porn or from having sex. I have been watching porn for a few years now and my PE is getting worse. I used to be able to last 15 minutes while masturbating to porn and now I will instantly get a rock hard erection and cum in 30 seconds and I physically can't edge because the sensation is just too powerful to control. I have the same problem with my girlfriend where I cum within 10 seconds of her blowing me, almost cumming before she even starts. Without porn, I can masturbate for 30+ minutes without cumming barely having to edge. I have been masturbating every other day without porn for around 2 months being able to last a while, but i tested with porn and still the second i turn on porn I cum instantly. I don't think my penis is too sensitive its just that porn or a girl doing something to me triggered something in me that makes me cum instantly. This is really affecting my confidence with girls and I have to try and avoid getting in to sexual situations because it is incredibly embarrassing and its making me depressed. I eat healthy and I exercise so I don't think thats my issue. My question is what do I do? How do I get rid of this trigger that happens in my brain that makes me cum instantly? Do I completely stop masturbating all together and give my brain a reset? Or do I try and practice edging more? Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Instead of being the slave of your arousal, train to be the observer and in the end controller. Of course our biological urges will do us hard when seeing a fine womans tight ass or boobs but you have to learn not get taken away by it. You may noticed that you see porn different after orgasm, more with an observers view.
I cant give you advice about cutting out porn, i would reduce it to only once or twice a week anyways for healthy habits.
Observe what gets you aroused, what makes your mind race into the fight or flight sex-orgasm mode and what calms you down. You are 18, your hormones have a lot to do with it, but the sooner you start to actively observe your own mind and actions and triggers, the sooner you will be able to tell what the roots and solutions are.

BTW there is usefull information in the stickies, check out arouse-levels in the stickies.

I would not stop to masturbate if you are having fun, but in a controlled manner. Dont race to orgasm, take the focus on plateau edging, so ejaculation is no longer the goal.

Also i know its very hard but try to eliminate the anxiety. One BIG step is talking to your girlfriend objectively and honest, she noticed it already anyways

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Quit porn read the stickies.

[difatech Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close difatech]

Instead of being the slave of your arousal, train to be the observer and in the end controller. Of course our biological urges will do us hard when seeing a fine womans tight ass or boobs but you have to learn not get taken away by it. You may noticed that you see porn different after orgasm, more with an observers view.
I cant give you advice about cutting out porn, i would reduce it to only once or twice a week anyways for healthy habits.
Observe what gets you aroused, what makes your mind race into the fight or flight sex-orgasm mode and what calms you down. You are 18, your hormones have a lot to do with it, but the sooner you start to actively observe your own mind and actions and triggers, the sooner you will be able to tell what the roots and solutions are.

BTW there is usefull information in the stickies, check out arouse-levels in the stickies.

I would not stop to masturbate if you are having fun, but in a controlled manner. Dont race to orgasm, take the focus on plateau edging, so ejaculation is no longer the goal.

Also i know its very hard but try to eliminate the anxiety. One BIG step is talking to your girlfriend objectively and honest, she noticed it already anyways

Thank you for the reply. My girfriend is actually my ex now we broke up around a month ago however my PE is by no means the reason we split. I forgot to mention that I did tell her and talk to her about my PE and she was totally understanding. She said she doesn't think anything less of me and it doesn't matter. Still, that didn't help my PE when I was with her, I would still cum almost instantly. I have been having long masturbation sessions without porn 3 to 4 times a week for around 45 minutes and for a month or two now and I have no problem lasting without porn. But I turned on porn the other day to test and I came in under 30 seconds starting from flaccid. I know the problem is psychological. My heart starts to race when a girl starts touching me and I cum very fast. I also notice that recently in a party setting if im talking to a girl, i'm not nervous to talk to girls at all, but when things seem like they might get sexual or I try and ask if she wants to hook up my heart races and my legs start to shake. I'm sure something like meditation could help that so i'm gonna search around and see what i find on that. I need to get rid of this anxiety that I have. It is ruining my life and its all I think about all day. There is a very attractive girl who I like a lot and who is in to me as well, but I can't do anything about it because I'm too embarrassed about my PE so I'm avoiding sex with her which really sucks. Any tips on how to calm myself down in sexual situations or when watching porn? What do you suggest for realizing my triggers and overcoming them? I know I have it in me to last long and I really want to get over this, but any sight of a naked girl makes me come instantly wether that be sex or in porn. Thanks again for the help.

[Big Al AdministratorPEGym EditorMale Enhancement Coach Rep.PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close Big Al]

The following may be of interest to you: The Detraining Effect: Understanding and Reversing Negative Habits To Improve Erection Quality and Sexual Confidence

[Joeybadsss30 Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Joeybadsss30]

Buy some Kratom and take 3-5 grams of it. All my homies and myself literally CANT cum on it. Ive never came on it. It just doesnt allow you to go over the edge for some reason. Do a google search. It should allow your orgasm to be delayed. Find your sweet spot where you take a certain amount in grams and can still cum but you dont cum right away. Good luck

[Casz976 Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Casz976]

Sounds like me years ago, except I didn't have sex back then. Your pelvic floor is simply way too tight like mine was and you need to do a lot of reverse kegels to relax it and learn how to control it. I remember even after one week of reverse kegels I saw results I never thought was possible.

[arandomperson Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close arandomperson]

Struggling with the same thing, except I’m 26 years old. I can masturbate/edge for just about as long as I want if I’m not too aroused, but as soon as I look at porn it’s over.

Casz976, why do you think it is a pelvic floor issue? The OP stated that he can masturbate for 30+ minutes without porn, so it sure doesn’t sound like a physical issue.

I swear, the obsession with pelvic floor balance is almost cult-like on this forum.

[Casz976 Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Casz976]

I can't see how it isn't a physical issue, porn or sex likely distracts him reverse kegeling while he's masturbating or having sex so it causes him to lose focus and ejaculate quickly.

[arandomperson Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close arandomperson]

That’s very easy to test... just try masturbating to porn while consciously reverse kegeling. It’s not like porn is so distracting that you literally forget everything else.

In my own personal experience, even the hardest RK won’t prevent ejaculation if I’m watching porn with continuous stimulation, even if it successfully reduces EQ. Similarly, if I’m not super mentally aroused, I can often intentionally kegel and achieve very high EQ but won’t feel the urge to ejaculate.

[Tooners88 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Tooners88]

Ejaculation is an interplay between physical sensations on the penis combined with the body's interpretation of what those sensations mean.

This is why edging with a blank mind is easy. The body knows your penis is not inside of a vagina and it's not just going to carelessly waste valuable sperm for no reason.

Add imagination into the mix or some porn, and now those physical sensations have sexual meaning behind them and therefore ejaculation occurs much faster. It's pretty much that simple as far as I'm concerned.

You've also trained yourself over the years to associate pornography with the high of an orgasm (it's essentially like a drug), so that conditioned response is probably pretty hard-wired at this point.

Anyway, the idea that it's purely a physical problem tied to the pelvic floor I'm certain is inaccurate in the majority of cases. It's a combination of various factors and they should all be addressed by those who are serious about curing themselves fully.

I used to advocate for using porn while edging in order to train arousal levels, but in my experience, regardless of how disciplined you might be, you still end up subconsciously chasing that orgasmic high. I also think that consistently watching porn places the default mode of your brain into a more hyper-aroused state - it's just not healthy in general, and I can feel the difference with or without it. I've also heard several guys who say they have a hard time orgasming during regular sex but can jerk off to porn and cum within minutes, so, I don't think porn and sex are equivalent either.

At this point I've ditched porn completely and just use imagination when edging - this puts you into a more realistic first person perspective where you can match your strokes and positions to what you're envisioning rather than watching other people have sex on a screen. And of course, having regular sex in real life (ideally with someone who knows about your issue and is patient and understanding about it) is also very helpful.

[jaxw Member Find all posts View Profile Close jaxw]

You need to be careful with RK's there was a post on here recently about the fact that you can relax your PF too much and while good for PE, it could have unintended concurrences, like incontinence. If your PF is too tight, it's also probably too weak and you should be doing a balance K/RK routine as well as stretches.