Nothing works

[andrewvi7 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close andrewvi7]

I think seeing a therapist is a good idea, because it sounds like you are suffering from some depression. I've suffered from depression too in the past, and you sound just like I did.

Now obviously there are things you can do to change your life, they will probably take time and will be very small and incremental. The best thing you can do right here and right now is to focus on changing your attitude. You might not like your life but it's the one you have and you should be grateful for it and make the most out of it.

Upon reading this, your mind is probably reacting like this: "fuck that feel good cliche bullshit, this dumb ass think's he's profound, like I haven't heard this shit a million times. He can fuck himself." Now that part of your brain is the biggest thing that is holding you back. There are parts of your brain that don't want you to get any better and wants to wallow in misery. Again, I'm speaking from my own experience with depression. You might not believe it now but your attitude determines everything. The richest guy with the biggest dick and the most hoes in the world, with a bad attitude towards life will still be a miserable fuck. Don't believe it? Take a look at rich and famous people who've killed themselves.

Oh and if you don't have an STU, just use lube.

Think that's called 'cognitive dissonance' if I remember correctly - hard shit to deal with, but needs to be done just for personal growth alone👍

[PE_Hell Member Find all posts View Profile Close PE_Hell]

I think seeing a therapist is a good idea, because it sounds like you are suffering from some depression. I've suffered from depression too in the past, and you sound just like I did.

Now obviously there are things you can do to change your life, they will probably take time and will be very small and incremental. The best thing you can do right here and right now is to focus on changing your attitude. You might not like your life but it's the one you have and you should be grateful for it and make the most out of it.

Upon reading this, your mind is probably reacting like this: "fuck that feel good cliche bullshit, this dumb ass think's he's profound, like I haven't heard this shit a million times. He can fuck himself." Now that part of your brain is the biggest thing that is holding you back. There are parts of your brain that don't want you to get any better and wants to wallow in misery. Again, I'm speaking from my own experience with depression. You might not believe it now but your attitude determines everything. The richest guy with the biggest dick and the most hoes in the world, with a bad attitude towards life will still be a miserable fuck. Don't believe it? Take a look at rich and famous people who've killed themselves.

Oh and if you don't have an STU, just use lube.

The problem is I dont have intimacy because my mom is in the house all day except for 30 minutes when she goes to the shops. It's fucking annoying. I need money, not a psychologist. Im making money online, im saving, but at this rate, it will take a good 9 years to save for a house, and it will not be the house I like, but at least I would have some intimacy. I will need to learn how to cook and shit like that tho. I may need to just gamble it in an investment in order to beat the time axis, otherwise by the time im living on my own I will be too old to bother with any of this.

[Johnny D ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close Johnny D]

The problem is I dont have intimacy because my mom is in the house all day except for 30 minutes when she goes to the shops. It's fucking annoying. I need money, not a psychologist. Im making money online, im saving, but at this rate, it will take a good 9 years to save for a house, and it will not be the house I like, but at least I would have some intimacy. I will need to learn how to cook and shit like that tho. I may need to just gamble it in an investment in order to beat the time axis, otherwise by the time im living on my own I will be too old to bother with any of this.

That's a bit contradictory when you said you "can edge for hours".

[ACPreE Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close ACPreE]

PE_Hell, I think we all got off on the wrong foot here. Lets start over.

If you can be level headed, calm down and understand we are not fighting you that the only reason I and others got frustrated with you is because of how you treated us and our advice. We know how it feels! We have, had or are recovering from the same kinda shit you are. Nobody wants to last 10seconds and get the super fun comments after, "Thats it, Wow that was fast, Thanks for nothing" The feeling of frustration and depression and just overall feeling of not being a man. Might as well just cut it off and become a woman, others are doing it. (Just a joke but you get what i mean about giving up) You probably feel trapped too, you cant fix your problem the way you want to and you cant get out of your personal situation. So what to do.

Lets start off this way, we get it, you don't want tennis balls in your ass. (nobody puts them in their ass) You have tried a few things with no results. Now I cant change your situation at home but I do know there is always a way to make your situation better. Nobody is as stuck as they choose to be.

Example: My gf got pregnant, I didn't have a career and was living on my dads couch. My job had just recently cut my pay 50% because of a price per piecework error in the computer they hadn't caught for a long time. What was i to do. I bought 2 35 dollar books to study for the first IT exam to get into the field. I studied like hell and passed both the tests and got a Job in IT. Was able to move out and start a family.

Point of the story is, You can change your situation. If you need more money, self study or take online classes, change jobs or move to an area more affordable. You are 30 not 15, you can do it if you want to. If you don't like your life, change it, if you cant change your life, change your attitude.

Now for the PreE side. Do you want to fix your problem? Like I'm asking 100% serious here. Do you want to fix your problem? Because we Want to help you. We aren't following memes or what is popular or flavor of the month. We are trial error testing and reading studies to try and grasp a better understanding of the interconnections of our pelvic area and our minds. We address sensitivity or arousal by many means. Edging is one of the best ways to learn your body. We think we know ourselves but there is so much we really don't know. I wish there was an easy answer to fix this problem but its a very complex system of interconnected parts.

I understand you can't edge because of privacy but is your mom in the shower with you? Where there is a will there is a way. The reason i say edging is because i feel that has been one of the most important learning tools i could have ever used. While edging i learned how to affect my arousal in many different ways. RKs, Breathing, Tension, Mindset and Conditioning Sensitivity. When I first started Edging I was very sensitive but now i'm much less sensitive. That is the training that we kept mentioning. Its not a do this and you are fixed, its a do this and over time you will get better.

There are many things that can be at play and everything that we practice here on site is attempting to fix specific areas of the issue. Gland squeezes for head sensitivity, breathing for anxiety and excitement, loosening the PF helps control arousal. Things will become easier and you will see results over time. Practice practice practice. During real sex everything changes that's why you feel like nothing in practice works in real sex. This is true to an extent. Lifting is an example i like to make. You want to lift 200lbs but you are only conditioned to lift 100. You were told lift that 100 every day and you will improve. You lift for 5 days and expect to lift 200. Its going to take time to work up to it but you can work up to it.

If you have questions please ask. I can probably speak for us all here when i say that we all are in this together. We want to help so please don't bite the hand that is extended to you.

[PE_Hell Member Find all posts View Profile Close PE_Hell]

That's a bit contradictory when you said you "can edge for hours".

when I used to have up to a week of privacy because my parents were away, i did so, not anymore

[PE_Hell Member Find all posts View Profile Close PE_Hell]

PE_Hell, I think we all got off on the wrong foot here. Lets start over.

If you can be level headed, calm down and understand we are not fighting you that the only reason I and others got frustrated with you is because of how you treated us and our advice. We know how it feels! We have, had or are recovering from the same kinda shit you are. Nobody wants to last 10seconds and get the super fun comments after, "Thats it, Wow that was fast, Thanks for nothing" The feeling of frustration and depression and just overall feeling of not being a man. Might as well just cut it off and become a woman, others are doing it. (Just a joke but you get what i mean about giving up) You probably feel trapped too, you cant fix your problem the way you want to and you cant get out of your personal situation. So what to do.

Lets start off this way, we get it, you don't want tennis balls in your ass. (nobody puts them in their ass) You have tried a few things with no results. Now I cant change your situation at home but I do know there is always a way to make your situation better. Nobody is as stuck as they choose to be.

Example: My gf got pregnant, I didn't have a career and was living on my dads couch. My job had just recently cut my pay 50% because of a price per piecework error in the computer they hadn't caught for a long time. What was i to do. I bought 2 35 dollar books to study for the first IT exam to get into the field. I studied like hell and passed both the tests and got a Job in IT. Was able to move out and start a family.

Point of the story is, You can change your situation. If you need more money, self study or take online classes, change jobs or move to an area more affordable. You are 30 not 15, you can do it if you want to. If you don't like your life, change it, if you cant change your life, change your attitude.

Now for the PreE side. Do you want to fix your problem? Like I'm asking 100% serious here. Do you want to fix your problem? Because we Want to help you. We aren't following memes or what is popular or flavor of the month. We are trial error testing and reading studies to try and grasp a better understanding of the interconnections of our pelvic area and our minds. We address sensitivity or arousal by many means. Edging is one of the best ways to learn your body. We think we know ourselves but there is so much we really don't know. I wish there was an easy answer to fix this problem but its a very complex system of interconnected parts.

I understand you can't edge because of privacy but is your mom in the shower with you? Where there is a will there is a way. The reason i say edging is because i feel that has been one of the most important learning tools i could have ever used. While edging i learned how to affect my arousal in many different ways. RKs, Breathing, Tension, Mindset and Conditioning Sensitivity. When I first started Edging I was very sensitive but now i'm much less sensitive. That is the training that we kept mentioning. Its not a do this and you are fixed, its a do this and over time you will get better.

There are many things that can be at play and everything that we practice here on site is attempting to fix specific areas of the issue. Gland squeezes for head sensitivity, breathing for anxiety and excitement, loosening the PF helps control arousal. Things will become easier and you will see results over time. Practice practice practice. During real sex everything changes that's why you feel like nothing in practice works in real sex. This is true to an extent. Lifting is an example i like to make. You want to lift 200lbs but you are only conditioned to lift 100. You were told lift that 100 every day and you will improve. You lift for 5 days and expect to lift 200. Its going to take time to work up to it but you can work up to it.

If you have questions please ask. I can probably speak for us all here when i say that we all are in this together. We want to help so please don't bite the hand that is extended to you.

i spent pretty much from age 16 to 29 edging.. because that is the only way I could enjoy masturbation (or sex.. basically). as a PEer it comes naturally.. if you are going to cum fast, might as well keep delaying it. I tried delaying the initial IK's (which is where if you keep going PONR gets hit and its over) with no success. the initial ik's start happening because it feels too good... it is insane to me how anyone can even get a 3 minute blowjob without cumming,

as far as wages, where im from it's pointless, everyone living away from parents home is due having 2 wages (bf+gf works), trust me. either this, or moving with other people which ultimately leads to same problem. people living on their own is a rare exception, and most likely consists on unability to save any money thus never forming any capital thus being stuck on some shithole permanently. right now at least im saving money.

i really want to improve, but given my experience i believe my major problem is that it feels to good so i must numb the feeling somehow. not even priligy at 60mg freaking worked. maybe it was beacause i tried it during a period of not ejaculating for 2 weeks and edging... i may start ejaculating like the average joe every other day or so and test again with priligy. however main problem anyway is the pills are expensive as fuck. you are robbed everyime you buy them. it's 60€ for 4 30mg pills.. a joke

we'll see how the fortacing goes

i do rk's daily while sitting on the computer

i also have to solve my hairloss problem, i have an appointment next week, some bloodworks, then injecting dutasteride on my scalp, fun times

[Johnny D ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close Johnny D]

i may start ejaculating like the average joe every other day or so

But still no edging...

[bigbob23 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close bigbob23]

I've never had a problem with pe. It sounds like you can edge, I assume without clamping/gripping.

If you're worried about performance for her, just change technique. Slow... it.... down...way down...use CAT technique, slow...small (pull out just a little) intentional thrusts, more grinding than pounding. When you get close, stop, switch to fingering or oral.

Other option is a TPE condom. I can't cum at all in one of those, makes you thicker too.

As for blowjobs, you have little control over the stimulation. Switch to that when you want to cum.

Can you dry orgasm or mmo? I just do that and keep going. I have more orgasms than she does. She doesn't even know it happens. I'll switch to oral while I'm cuming. Then switch back.

The switching for us works. The only time it matters is when she is very very close. If I switch then, it pisses her off.

[Bobsadcock Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Bobsadcock]

i spent pretty much from age 16 to 29 edging.. because that is the only way I could enjoy masturbation (or sex.. basically). as a PEer it comes naturally.. if you are going to cum fast, might as well keep delaying it. I tried delaying the initial IK's (which is where if you keep going PONR gets hit and its over) with no success. the initial ik's start happening because it feels too good... it is insane to me how anyone can even get a 3 minute blowjob without cumming,

as far as wages, where im from it's pointless, everyone living away from parents home is due having 2 wages (bf+gf works), trust me. either this, or moving with other people which ultimately leads to same problem. people living on their own is a rare exception, and most likely consists on unability to save any money thus never forming any capital thus being stuck on some shithole permanently. right now at least im saving money.

i really want to improve, but given my experience i believe my major problem is that it feels to good so i must numb the feeling somehow. not even priligy at 60mg freaking worked. maybe it was beacause i tried it during a period of not ejaculating for 2 weeks and edging... i may start ejaculating like the average joe every other day or so and test again with priligy. however main problem anyway is the pills are expensive as fuck. you are robbed everyime you buy them. it's 60€ for 4 30mg pills.. a joke

we'll see how the fortacing goes

i do rk's daily while sitting on the computer

i also have to solve my hairloss problem, i have an appointment next week, some bloodworks, then injecting dutasteride on my scalp, fun times

I think :

1. Rk alone isn't enough. People tend to do a whole range of rehabilitative exercises which include stretches, massage, and apt correction to get their pf in healthy shape.

2. Edging has to be done the right way, to develop arousal awareness and arousal control techniques. Look in the pre e 90 thread for information on how to do both 1 and 2.

3. Forget the hair, shave it all off. Sounds like it's more trouble than it's worth.

[ACPreE Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close ACPreE]

i spent pretty much from age 16 to 29 edging.. because that is the only way I could enjoy masturbation (or sex.. basically). as a PEer it comes naturally.. if you are going to cum fast, might as well keep delaying it. I tried delaying the initial IK's (which is where if you keep going PONR gets hit and its over) with no success. the initial ik's start happening because it feels too good... it is insane to me how anyone can even get a 3 minute blowjob without cumming,

as far as wages, where im from it's pointless, everyone living away from parents home is due having 2 wages (bf+gf works), trust me. either this, or moving with other people which ultimately leads to same problem. people living on their own is a rare exception, and most likely consists on unability to save any money thus never forming any capital thus being stuck on some shithole permanently. right now at least im saving money.

i really want to improve, but given my experience i believe my major problem is that it feels to good so i must numb the feeling somehow. not even priligy at 60mg freaking worked. maybe it was beacause i tried it during a period of not ejaculating for 2 weeks and edging... i may start ejaculating like the average joe every other day or so and test again with priligy. however main problem anyway is the pills are expensive as fuck. you are robbed everyime you buy them. it's 60€ for 4 30mg pills.. a joke

we'll see how the fortacing goes

i do rk's daily while sitting on the computer

i also have to solve my hairloss problem, i have an appointment next week, some bloodworks, then injecting dutasteride on my scalp, fun times

When you say 16-29 do you mean start and stop? Edging is more about building a plateau and learning arousal scale. If you are experience start and stop then you may understand the scale but practicing holding higher arousal levels for longer time is what we aim for when Edging. The longer we can maintain higher levels of arousal, the more stamina that can be build in the form of a plateau. When you get into a plateau, you will know because you can literally go ape shit on your dick and be good for X amount of time. Its almost like you press pause on your arousal for a little bit.

Edging is a great tool to learn how to counter arousal. That is why it is advocated in most routines. Testing how different types of breathing affects arousal, how doing a Front RK can drop arousal and how just mind over matter control. There are many things to practice while edging and the better you get the more you can control your arousal. When i first learned i wasn't doing a full front RK, I was on my back practicing while edging and moved the feeling forward more and i felt the arousal drop and my Erection quality start to drop too. This was one of the discoveries i made while edging. I thought i was doing it right the whole time and then boom back to square 1. I loosened up the pelvic floor but I hadn't been practicing the correct area for Front RKs.

Wages, I live in California and we together bring in about 80k and we can't even think about moving out of our 1 bedroom apt. I used to think like you too and still do. I would still be living at my dads saving money if I didn't knock up my GF and have it force me to get a career and move out. Sometimes life happens and you just have to go with it or it will run you over.

I'm Glad you want to improve and being here is a great start. I know you think the feeling is too strong and you feel like nothing you will do here will affect that besides using chemicals. I thought that too but after enough edging sessions and really training on all the techniques, I realized that the feeling that feels so good can be controlled to an extent in the form of arousal control. If your arousal is really high, the feeling is much greater. This is both a mental and physical issue.

Higher arousal can come from a tight PF, Shallow breathing, allowing anxiety and the fight or flight feeling to wash inside of you and other things as well. The work we do with the tennis balls and stretches are to help with the tight PF. Tight PFs can be caused from a lot of sitting, APT, poor fitness and other issues as well. I feel like you are combining arousal to feeling but I feel like they are 2 different things. Arousal makes feeling and feeling makes arousal. If you can drop your arousal, you can drop some sensitivity.

Also Conditioning helps lower sensitivity. Like a previous example i had about when i first started edging with lube and hand I was having IKs and sometimes they were really strong. After enough sessions, my IKs stopped and now can just get right into it without having to tip toe lightly. The sensitivity lowered and I am now able to have a lot more control while edging.

If you start masturbating every other day, try to see how long you can balance at an 8 on the scale. Shoot to balance longer in the higher arousal level every time and see if you up your time. I don't mean go till you hit 9.5 and stop, I mean go till you get to 8 or 8.5 slow down bring it back to an 8 and try to maintain without going to a 9 or PONR. This will train you to be able to withstand higher levels of arousal and feeling before you go over the PONR.

What could be the reason why medications aren't working too is because your mind is overpowering it. I'm learning more and more how impact the mind is over this issue and actually got this supplement Kava Kava extract to help with my performance anxiety. My mind and thinking about cumming fast is killing me even with all the PF Progress i have made.

So you say you do RK's daily. Sitting is very difficult to do a really good strong RK. Can you do them while standing? When you do them, do you feel a drop in the area between the balls and ahole or more so under the balls? I was doing them more in the middle area before i pushed the force closer to under the balls. Kind of like if you had a little bit of pee you wanted to push out feeling except not on top of the shaft where the abs meet but underneath where the balls are you should feel a relax, drop or inflating downwards feeling. The more stretched the PF is though the easier and harder you will feel the RKs. If you have trouble doing them while standing you may need to look into APT. Anterior pelvic tilt. Can youtube how to identify if you have it but it is very important to know if you do or not as this can be something that needs to be addressed for better success with RKs and loosening the PF.

I knew someone who was balding at 18, sometimes its just how we were made. You may need to shave it off and not stress about it. Easier that way at least.

That PreE90 routine is a very good read from Willgetbetter. He has helped a lot of people here get better and progress. His write up is very detailed and a very educational read.

Edited: To say sorry for the long posts. Kind of just let my mind flow and keep typing. Then when i hit send i realize i wrote a novel XD

[kaptagiwrgis Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close kaptagiwrgis]

Since priligy is expensive and you don't mind using pills antidepressants seem like the only way for you. They work, they are cheap and trust me u seem like u need them. Go to a therapist and don't lose hope. Also the Chinese cream is cheap, it works and it doesn't take the pleasure away. As my doctor said "don't be sad, there is a solution for ur problem either pills or numbing creams, there is absolutely no reason to be sad"