Reverse premature ejaculation

[itguy123 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close itguy123]

I have the opposite problem of most people on this forum. I can't get off during sex. I've never been able to pee in front of people. I've been kegeling since age 12 and definitely have porn addiction. I believe my girlfriend left me because she thought I was pretending to like her as she couldn't get me off. My ability to get off now relies on mental stimulation moreso then physical.

regular sex seems almost boring even after I haven't had any for a year. Anyone else have this problem and found a solution.

[Batwoman Moderator ReservePEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close Batwoman]

This is called "delayed ejaculation" and is not uncommon. We have several guys here with experience with this, I am sure they can offer you some help.

[smallpackageRay Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close smallpackageRay]

Do you have much feeling in your foreskin? I might also think that you might be getting too tense to perform and stressing that you have to get off that it ends up being the last thing that you can do. Especially were you say mental stimulation helps, your mind is chaging its focus.

The best advice for a solution I can give you is just relax. Remembe women are more into the romance that all the banging if she is really into you. Try to enjoy the foreplay and lets the intercourse come naturally. If she is comfortable with you going down on her, do that before intercourse. It will give you the opportunity to do some of the mental work while you are warming her up. you can rub a bit on the sheets to get your skin a bit more sensitive as well. If you just can't cum, since you haven't cum in her, she should be fine with you going down on her again and keeping the passion going. Some women feel uncomfortable and "too dirty" to be eaten after ejaculation.

But the last thing you want to do is stop in the middle of itercourse and end it. I would think thhat would come across that she isn't turning you on.

My wife and I have many sessions where don't cum. Sometimes its to my own choosing sometimes it just happens that I have delayed my ejaculation cause the sex feels so good that I get over sensitized and I simply can't cum. But by the time we are done, she is all feeling good.

[hsarge Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close hsarge]

Read on TRAUMATIC MASTURBATORY SYNDROME. If you masturbate using too much pressure, particularly prone, you can have trouble ejaculating during sex. But don't worry you can change the process. Read.

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Do you masturbate with a firm grip? do you do reverse kegals ? Describe your kegels during sex length of hold how often etc.

[km0 Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close km0]

I don't have any advice/tips but I was just wondering how do you NOT get off?

Does it just not feel good or what?
I have the opposite where I come in 10 seconds and I don't understand how you couldn't. Sex feels so good on my dick.

I think I would rather have your problem than mine :P

[itguy123 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close itguy123]

Do you masturbate with a firm grip? do you do reverse kegals ? Describe your kegels during sex length of hold how often etc.

I do not masterbate with a firm grip. Not sure what a reverse kegal is. I would say everytime I feel like i might be getting anywhere near ejaculation during sex, my body automatically starts kegeling. I would say I do hundreds of kegels per sex session involuntarily with hold times of just a second or two up to 20-30 seconds. The sex definitely feels good. No doubt about it. I think it is more a tension problem then anything else. Like i said, I have always had trouble peeing in front of people and I think it might be mostly mental.

My body tenses up when I get close to ejaculation. In other words, my body kegals and holds it back. They are not involuntary, but I just naturally do them. I can't think of a sex session that has been under 30 minutes for me. I would say out of the 50 or so times I was with my last girlfriend, I got off maybe half of them and it required me to really put myself mentally somewhere else. I had to keep telling myself that "i am screwing a beautiful women who wants your cum" etc etc etc to get myself there mentally.

Also on another note, when I don't get off, i generally have to go to another room and look at porn and masturbate to finish. She definitely cannot be in the room or it completely kills it for me. I don't get off to blow jobs either.

P.S. It's not just sex either. Generally a masturbation sessions for me takes well over an hour. Sometimes I can get off in like 20 minutes, but not often.

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Ok anxiety is defenitly part of de and seems to be the main cause in your case. You seem to have some deep seated issues that are beyond the scope of this site. I would suggest some help for anxiety, does this affect other areas of your life?

When you have general anxiety is under control you could try again with sexing till she is happy, then masturbating while she is there. You must try to change your kegels around so that they promote ejaculation reather than prevent it.
As you get used to this have her rub your balls or in general become part of the process.

It could take time to overcome this but I have and others have so can you.

[itguy123 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close itguy123]

I am seeing a psychologist and a psychiatrist for numerous reasons including anxiety.

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

You are working forward, this is a positive thing,I wish you the best.

[Minuteman Member of the Month March 2013. Find all posts View Profile Close Minuteman]

I am seeing a psychologist and a psychiatrist for numerous reasons including anxiety.

I had quite an anxiety problems and panic attacks and what not. I went to the psychiatrist and all that he thought me is that sooner or later it is i who have to fix my problems, i who have to face my demons and i'm grateful to him for that. Sometimes even if we know the answer to our problems somebody has to spell them out for us. We people are strange and complicated beings...

[twopumpchump Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close twopumpchump]

yah move forward with some help and yull be fine! keep up the good work and dont be hard on yourself

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

I hope this thread has been good for a number of members.

[Going411x7 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Going411x7]

Many of us suffer from extreme anxiety and depression--one leads to the other. I suffered with it for years. I finally overcame it, but it took me a long time, with therapy, self-help programs, and, finally, of course, time itself.