Awesome progress with my PE problem. Details inside...

[minute_man Member Find all posts View Profile Close minute_man]

So I'll start from the beginning. I've been an avid porn viewer for like 10 years or so, and during these 10 years I would masturbate as fast and furiously as I could to reach climax as fast as I could. I've pretty much had premature ejaculation as far back as I can remember, I'm 23 now.

Then about a year ago I started to think, what if I get a girlfriend. I would undoubtedly disappoint her with my performance in the sack and that's been weighing heavy on my mind. So I set out to cure my problem with the help of this site which I promptly discovered soon after.

I cut porn completely, deleted my 50 GB porn collection, deleted my porn bookmarks (sad I know), and began researching this site. I made myself a routine which included mainly reverse kegels, kegels, and edging. I went about this routine for 2 months or so and saw some great improvements. At the start of the routine I could barely stimulate my penis without feeling the PONR coming closer while edging (hands), and two months down the line I could go 30+ minutes before feeling the need to burst. I was stoked that I was seeing improvements.

But then I purchased a fleshlight (Spider Hands Free Masturbator) and could barely last 5 thrusts (all of 10 seconds), and I was back to square one. I then had to put my PE on the backburner as a result of an injury I got when masturbating (I don't really want to get into it but it's not relevant to this story anyway), but I'm mostly better now and have resumed my PE.

So despite my terrible performance with the Spider I was determined to stick with it because I know that it's the closest I'm going to get to the sensations of sex, without actually having sex. The Spider btw is an awesome pocket pussy that I totally recommend over the regular fleshlights. It is textured like a real vagina inside, with many bumps and even a g-spot. This, coupled with the fact that it's hands free (wall mounted), makes it just about the closest thing to real sex. Moving on, I totally discarded kegels and reverse kegels btw because of the injury I withstood but I've slowly come to realize they are not that important, and I'll get into that later on.

So for the past few weeks now my practice sessions simply entail humping the wall mounted pocket pussy. I started off by simply thrusting ONE time, and then pulling out. Wait a few seconds, thrust one time again, and pull out for a little. My first few sessions would go like this. By doing this, I give my penis a chance to get used to the feeling of the pussy, because if I thrusted any more than this I would blow in seconds and it would be all over, without even having the opportunity for progression.

After a few sessions like this, I would then move it to TWO thrusts, and then pull out, wait a few seconds, two thursts again, pull out. Again I continued in this fashion, slowly increasing the amount of thrusts as I continued with the sessions. I am now at somewhere around 2 months in with this technique, and today I went 25 minutes of doing 18-25 consecutive thrusts, and then pull out. 3 months ago this would have been inconceivable to me. So because of this technique im using, I totally dropped any form of kegels because I'm of the belief that as long as you give your member the chance to get used to the proper feeling of a vagina, then kegels aren't going to make much of a difference. Doing this I've mostly overcome the involuntary kegels which I would get before. Kegels exercises in my opinion and in my experience won't rid the involuntary kegels during sex/stimulation, it's all about getting used to the sensations of sex.

So I encourage everyone who's struggling with PE to give a fleshlight/spider masturbator a try. I truly believe that without it I wouldn't be able to cure my problem before hooking up with a girl. That's not to say I'm cured, far from it, but the constant improvements are enough to indicate to me that I'm on the right track.

Happy PEing!

[dobby Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close dobby]

Great post!

I'm in total agreement that reaction to stimulation is more important than a balanced pelvic floor.

Not to say the latter isn't helpful, but not enough attention is given to proper edging techniques, fleshlights and rewiring the ejaculatory reflex.

This post + ammonites on edging for PreE are were a lot of people should start as they are both very beneficial.

[ammonite Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close ammonite]

Great post!

I'm in total agreement that reaction to stimulation is more important than a balanced pelvic floor.

Not to say the latter isn't helpful, but not enough attention is given to proper edging techniques, fleshlights and rewiring the ejaculatory reflex.

This post + ammonites on edging for PreE are were a lot of people should start as they are both very beneficial.

The problem with reaction to stimulation is that it, unlike pelvic floor balance, I don't think it is something which can be taught. It is also much less understood, and could vary from person to person. I think everyone must figure out how to rewire their own responses. I tried to give some helpful tips in my edging thread, and this thread is certainly helpful, but since it is purely psychological, it just isn't possible to tell someone how exactly to control pleasure or access the plateau phase.

I would like to point out here that my view is that some degree of pelvic floor balance is essential before you can start changing your reaction to stimulation. After all, if your pelvic floor is so tense that it causes uncontrollable IK, you're not going to be able to have much of a chance to begin changing your response, because it'll all be over in less than a minute.


I think the best way to go about rewiring your response is to start a log, preferably on site so you can receive guidance from other users and also provide inspiration. The only way you can change your response is having an open mind, and paying attention to your body. As I have pointed about before, MM is a perfect example of this mind set, which is why I think everyone should read at least some of his log. Some of it may sound like gibberish to someone yet to start the journey, but once you open your mind, you will be amazed at what you can discover about your own body - you WILL discover sensations you didn't know you could have, once you begin to get over Pre E.