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Not sure how many of these I do. At least 1 more. Through my own journey in life I've found some things that have helped me out quite a bit. These personal experiences are the basis for my posts. Feel free to chime in on any of these with your own experiences and what you've done to get past it and learn from it...
Another cause of insecurity (not to mention anxiety) is social interaction. A personality test can help you better understand how you process and interact with the world around you. If you haven't done one, or haven't done one recently, give it a shot. Don't need to pay for one. A Google search will bring up quite a few options. Understanding what makes you tick and how you think can help you deal with the environment around you.
For example: in a group of people at the bar: "Billy Bob! Why aren't you saying anything?" "Oh, he's just shy." "No, he's just sitting there judging everyone." "Ok, back to what the Kardashians did last night. Blah blah blah." Billy Bob isn't shy, per se. He just isn't that great at small talk. He doesn't fit in with the crowd, even though the crowd is his freinds. And now anxiety sets in because he can't contribute to the conversation and apparently they think he's judging them. He has to say something FAST! But... nothing comes to mind. Then he blurts out something kind of weird. Everyone looks at him with a puzzled look on their face. He turns beet red. Someone finally says, "Classic Billy Bob." They laugh and continue the conversation. Nobody thinks twice about what Billy Bob said... except Billy Bob... over and over and over.
Billy Bob is an introvert and his friends are extroverts. If BB knew he was an introvert, he would know that introverts aren't typically fans of small talk. They prefer more in-depth conversations that are slow paced and though provoking. This doesn't mean extroverts are shallow-minded or dumb or anything remotely like that. It's just the way different personality types interact with each other. Introvoerts typically don't like physical contact. Extroverts typically do. Knowing simple things like these can do and do do wonders in a social setting. (yes... I said do do).
So much research has come about in regards to personalities, corporate team building, etc. Read read read. It's been around 12 years since I started really digging in to my personality and thought processes. I most certainly am an introvert. The rest of the world seems to be mostly extroverted. Over half of my life was spent thinking I was "just shy" or "socially inept" or "just not a people person" or a "social reject", avoiding social situations, and overflowing with anxiety when I was in one. It affected my romantic relationships as well. Turns out I never was any of these. I just didn't know it and for too long. Whichever personality type you are... there is nothing wrong with you. (Unless you have quite a few of them and eat people, but that's a different thread altogether.) All you need to do is learn how your particular personality fits in this world and how you can interact with it in a manner that best fits you. It really is as easy as a Google search.
The really intersting thing I've found, is some of our insecurities feed others, or create new insecurities altogether. Conversly, once we start working on something, other things start to fade. Life is a growing/learning process. Start with yourself.
Another cause of insecurity (not to mention anxiety) is social interaction. A personality test can help you better understand how you process and interact with the world around you. If you haven't done one, or haven't done one recently, give it a shot. Don't need to pay for one. A Google search will bring up quite a few options. Understanding what makes you tick and how you think can help you deal with the environment around you.
For example: in a group of people at the bar: "Billy Bob! Why aren't you saying anything?" "Oh, he's just shy." "No, he's just sitting there judging everyone." "Ok, back to what the Kardashians did last night. Blah blah blah." Billy Bob isn't shy, per se. He just isn't that great at small talk. He doesn't fit in with the crowd, even though the crowd is his freinds. And now anxiety sets in because he can't contribute to the conversation and apparently they think he's judging them. He has to say something FAST! But... nothing comes to mind. Then he blurts out something kind of weird. Everyone looks at him with a puzzled look on their face. He turns beet red. Someone finally says, "Classic Billy Bob." They laugh and continue the conversation. Nobody thinks twice about what Billy Bob said... except Billy Bob... over and over and over.
Billy Bob is an introvert and his friends are extroverts. If BB knew he was an introvert, he would know that introverts aren't typically fans of small talk. They prefer more in-depth conversations that are slow paced and though provoking. This doesn't mean extroverts are shallow-minded or dumb or anything remotely like that. It's just the way different personality types interact with each other. Introvoerts typically don't like physical contact. Extroverts typically do. Knowing simple things like these can do and do do wonders in a social setting. (yes... I said do do).
So much research has come about in regards to personalities, corporate team building, etc. Read read read. It's been around 12 years since I started really digging in to my personality and thought processes. I most certainly am an introvert. The rest of the world seems to be mostly extroverted. Over half of my life was spent thinking I was "just shy" or "socially inept" or "just not a people person" or a "social reject", avoiding social situations, and overflowing with anxiety when I was in one. It affected my romantic relationships as well. Turns out I never was any of these. I just didn't know it and for too long. Whichever personality type you are... there is nothing wrong with you. (Unless you have quite a few of them and eat people, but that's a different thread altogether.) All you need to do is learn how your particular personality fits in this world and how you can interact with it in a manner that best fits you. It really is as easy as a Google search.
The really intersting thing I've found, is some of our insecurities feed others, or create new insecurities altogether. Conversly, once we start working on something, other things start to fade. Life is a growing/learning process. Start with yourself.