A Proposition

[Flanker6 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Flanker6]

Basically I wanted to give some history then outline this proposition for a girl that would be in my best interest to date. She's 18, I'm 20 we're both busy people when it comes to the beginning of next semester, so I figure why not ask her to see each other? We'd go out on dates and such, it wouldn't be like a fuck buddies kind of thing but there wouldn't be the stress of being in a relationship with two people who are busy 6 days out of the week. I think we have good chemistry and we've already had sex before; I gave her probably one of her best orgasms. So there's no reason for me to believe that we wouldn't be compatible sexually. The only thing that causes me to hesitate is her possible lack of interest in me. I always initiate the conversation but whenever I do she always says "Hey babe" or something to that effect. We hung out very recently and had a good conversation and I was getting good signals from her. She's still attracted to me physically. So I'm wondering why the lack of interest? And is it even worth it to propose this to a girl who acts like this?

[MrBigDick Retired ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close MrBigDick]

Basically I wanted to give some history then outline this proposition for a girl that would be in my best interest to date. She's 18, I'm 20 we're both busy people when it comes to the beginning of next semester, so I figure why not ask her to see each other? We'd go out on dates and such, it wouldn't be like a fuck buddies kind of thing but there wouldn't be the stress of being in a relationship with two people who are busy 6 days out of the week. I think we have good chemistry and we've already had sex before; I gave her probably one of her best orgasms. So there's no reason for me to believe that we wouldn't be compatible sexually. The only thing that causes me to hesitate is her possible lack of interest in me. I always initiate the conversation but whenever I do she always says "Hey babe" or something to that effect. We hung out very recently and had a good conversation and I was getting good signals from her. She's still attracted to me physically. So I'm wondering why the lack of interest? And is it even worth it to propose this to a girl who acts like this?

What makes you think there is this lack of interest? It sounds like it might be a really good idea, it just depends on the method to which you choose to deliver your proposal. If she really digs you and is physically attracted to you, that's 1/2 the battle right there. Also, the fact that you and she have already had sex builds that comfort level.

[Flanker6 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Flanker6]

What makes you think there is this lack of interest? It sounds like it might be a really good idea, it just depends on the method to which you choose to deliver your proposal. If she really digs you and is physically attracted to you, that's 1/2 the battle right there. Also, the fact that you and she have already had sex builds that comfort level.

Well my apprehension comes from the absence of communication on her part. Its almost as if she's playing hard to get, but we've known each other for 4 years, that makes little sense. I just have doubts because I haven't received any initiation on her part. I definitely plan on talking to her about this in person, I'm pretty good at body language (one of the reasons I hate having to flirt over texts or instant messaging).

[phil88 Banned Find all posts View Profile Close phil88]

Do you like a girl that initiates? I know I do. I'm speaking about conversation not sex. I think thats the only question that matters. I wouldnt really expect someone to change over a short period of time and having to start every conversation yourself could be a real mood killer if its not something your into.

[Flanker6 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Flanker6]

Do you like a girl that initiates? I know I do. I'm speaking about conversation not sex. I think thats the only question that matters. I wouldnt really expect someone to change over a short period of time and having to start every conversation yourself could be a real mood killer if its not something your into.

Its not even so much that. Its the trading turns that I like. I don't expect for her to initiate EVERY conversation, but should at least be starting 50% of them. I want her to show she at least wants to hang out. Its one of those "Yeah lets hangout!" then I never hear from her. Frustrating as fuck, but I will admit it keeps me more interested, although I don't like it. Its some verbal sadomacicism

[TTBB Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close TTBB]

I think she might like your attention.. i think she views you as a friend she once fucked or could fuck if she wanted to...
when girls are interested in a guy they can't stop themselves from making contact.

[Flanker6 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Flanker6]

I think she might like your attention.. i think she views you as a friend she once fucked or could fuck if she wanted to...
when girls are interested in a guy they can't stop themselves from making contact.

I figured that. What baffles me is she used to have a crush on me. I mean we had sex less than a month after her and her ex broke up. Tragic thing is, I didn't start to have a thing for her until she lost interest in me. I'm basically JD from Scrubs.

[TTBB Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close TTBB]

Well she might have gotten the impression that you are just not that into her.
you might have missed your window of opportunity..
she had a crush on you .. you slept with her then you did nothing... she might feel used or rejected .. but values your friendship..
she could be wary of you... or she could have emotionally moved on from her crush feelings.
She could still have feelings but it sounds like she knows you want her more when she doesn't want you.
but i do think if she still had a crush on you she would be contacting you..
you can still make the proposal but be cautious.. if she had a crush on you what you propose she might view as insulting or not enough.. or just not be interested.. or she will say why not and let you back in.

[BULLDOG91 Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close BULLDOG91]

I think she might like your attention.. i think she views you as a friend she once fucked or could fuck if she wanted to...
when girls are interested in a guy they can't stop themselves from making contact.

This is well said.
flanker6 does your girl no my girl. alot of girls are doing this crap now

[Flanker6 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Flanker6]

Well she might have gotten the impression that you are just not that into her.
you might have missed your window of opportunity..
she had a crush on you .. you slept with her then you did nothing... she might feel used or rejected .. but values your friendship..
she could be wary of you... or she could have emotionally moved on from her crush feelings.
She could still have feelings but it sounds like she knows you want her more when she doesn't want you.
but i do think if she still had a crush on you she would be contacting you..
you can still make the proposal but be cautious.. if she had a crush on you what you propose she might view as insulting or not enough.. or just not be interested.. or she will say why not and let you back in.

Thanks for the advice TTBB. I can't remember much as the whole incident was a while back, a year ago to be exact, but it probably had to do something with her ex finding out. She would text me very flustered (yes so flustered you tell through reading) that her ex found out some how and she freaked out. I think she still had some residual feelings for him at the time so the situation was a big cluster fuck. Made me look like I bragged even though the only people that knew was a friend of mine who was literally in the same room as it was happening (bunk beds, gotta love dorms), and a close friend of mine (who knew both her and her ex so I definitely did not make the best choice). It even came up about a month ago where she brought up how people are still finding out we had sex and she "claims" she doesn't care who knows anymore. I think I need to get her to open up more about everything that happened before I can make a decision.