So there's this girl, right...

[Cockadoodle Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Cockadoodle]

She's very nice. Intelligent. Ambitious. Bout' 5'6 and is a 8 out of 10.
We have been together for approximately 2 weeks. I see her on a
a day-to-day basis too. I just have one problem with her. Whenever
she's with one of her friends ( almost all the time) she ignores me.
It has been like this for a while. And I mean ignore me. It's like
we're on different planes of existance or at least on the opposite side of
the football field.

Also, she is the one who asked me out (I've got a busy life).
So, dislike of me isn't really a choice here.

What should I do? Talking to her seems to be the best choice to me.
But, I'm not really sure. Maybe I should assert myself a little more?

[NP97 Retired ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close NP97]

Tell her how you feel.

[BigO AdministratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close BigO]

Stop hanging out with her when her friends are going to be there. She is either doing this to get rid of you or she has no damn clue how you feel and is just not getting it. I am not trying to hurt your feelings but I have seen this tactic used before. If you tell her you dont want to hang out with her friends and she says " then too bad " you have your answer already. If you say you want to go somewhere and ask her to go with you and she declines, once again you have your answer. If she decides that spending time with you is a great idea and cant wait to do something alone then you have a good answer. Either way this one is pretty black and white to me.
Tell her you are taking her to dinner and a movie tonight and then you want to take her some where else as well. this will let her see that she is going to be spending som hours with you alone and without her friends. if she says she does not want to take you and your pride and walk away now. Any new relation ship should be filled with that I want to be with you time.

[Cockadoodle Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Cockadoodle]

Stop hanging out with her when her friends are going to be there.

Like I said in in my previous post, she's consistently surrounded with her friends. She even took a friend
on our movie date last night! But I will talk to her about this. Thanks!


@NP97:Yes sir!

[BigO AdministratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close BigO]

Good luck, I dont know your age and I do know that at a younger age somtimes younger people get al wrapped up in their friends so talking to her is dfinately the best bet. No friends on dates is a good rule. It os cool when a group goes out but if she insists on bringing a friend again say no.

[somebodyelse Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close somebodyelse]

Best not to hang out with your girl and her friends. Those are her friends for a reason. Keep yourself outta that circle

[Drummer19 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Drummer19]

Sometimes it is an act of dominance, as with my ex-girlfriend. She would ignore me in front of her friends and I would confront her about in front of her friends. She would get pissy at me for confronting her in front of her friends but I had tried just talking to her privately and she would deny it.

Anyways, she wasn't going to change and it wasn't worth my time, so I left. We tried to work it out but that was her personality, disrespect.

I suggest after talking to her to stick up to what you say. If she wants to hang out with you and her friends say no (and say why). When you don't listen to her she will start wondering why you don't listen to her. When she loses control of you she will either a) Say shes sorry and try hard to make it up to you. or b) ignore it and wait for you to crack. If she chooses b then just drop her. She will either get the picture then and want you back, or if she doesn't it is over and you were the better person. Sometimes you have to lay down the law, but just remember to be "fair" about it and you can't lose!

[powow Member Find all posts View Profile Close powow]

Sometimes it is an act of dominance, as with my ex-girlfriend. She would ignore me in front of her friends and I would confront her about in front of her friends. She would get pissy at me for confronting her in front of her friends but I had tried just talking to her privately and she would deny it.

Anyways, she wasn't going to change and it wasn't worth my time, so I left. We tried to work it out but that was her personality, disrespect.

I suggest after talking to her to stick up to what you say. If she wants to hang out with you and her friends say no (and say why). When you don't listen to her she will start wondering why you don't listen to her. When she loses control of you she will either a) Say shes sorry and try hard to make it up to you. or b) ignore it and wait for you to crack. If she chooses b then just drop her. She will either get the picture then and want you back, or if she doesn't it is over and you were the better person. Sometimes you have to lay down the law, but just remember to be "fair" about it and you can't lose!

Completely agree with this. It's a win-win situation. Don't even bring it up with her alone. It's a subconscious test she's putting you through and you have nothing to lose by standing up for yourself. As long as you're a man about it and stay reasonble (i.e. not whiny), her friends will secretly put you in their good books even if she's confrontational at the moment. This will work in your favor whatever the outcome. If she never wants to hear from you again, you walk away with your pride.

[BigO AdministratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close BigO]

Great advice Drummer.

[Drummer19 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Drummer19]

Thank you BigO and powow! I dealt with this for a few months (longer than I should have) but I wanted to learn from it so I dealt with it to find the best way out and taking the time to learn why it happened will only help me in th future to learn from my mistakes.

And just like you said, powow, ALL of her friends agreed with me (including her mom) because I was straight up about it and fair. It as incredible to have everyone on my side, but that is how a man does it. ;]

[ThomasJohnThomas Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close ThomasJohnThomas]

8 out of 10? Do you seriously think like that? Who does that? If someone thought of me like that, I would probably ignore them too.

[Drummer19 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Drummer19]

I think it is considered normal now-a-days Thomas. I do use the same terminology when explaining a girl to friends, but I don't think it is moral by any means. I consider it a bad habit.

[powow Member Find all posts View Profile Close powow]

I think it is considered normal now-a-days Thomas. I do use the same terminology when explaining a girl to friends, but I don't think it is moral by any means. I consider it a bad habit.

Agreed. It's a shortcut of sorts and it makes explaining easier. It's not moral, but most guys do it subconsciously when checking out girls. It's personal matter anyway, in the sense that it's relative to his tastes and preferences. It's not like he's casting a fashion show.

[BigO AdministratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close BigO]

I use the 10 scale, on a rainy da as a roofer the day would be a zero out of ten. A 1969 Corvette with a 427 and 3 dueces is a 10 out of ten and in my opinion Charlize Theron is also a 10.

[ThomasJohnThomas Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close ThomasJohnThomas]

Good ol` objectification of women...