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A PUD To Aaron Kemmer, our founder and leader
(Please read to the tune of the "Budweiser Real Men of Genious" jingle)
For getting such a firm grip on a sensitive subject. For passionately stroking the small frail egos of so many men. For giving men all over the world the hope and prospect of a better self, a bigger self and a bulging self. For helping to fulfill as well as fully fill the vast voids in so many women's lives as well as their panties. For boldly reaching out with that which no man had reached out with before, at least no further than six inches or so. For challenging the very laws of nature and genetics without once ever harming a guinea pig or lab rat. And for giving men the opportunity to stand out and even stick out inches above and beyond the rest. Its as though you've helped rebuild them. made them Harder, Longer, Thicker and Stronger than they were, and you didn't have to spend six million dollars doing it. That's right Mr. Penis Exercising Man, thanks to you men are no longer hiding in restroom corners when they pee. Many men are no longer turning the lights out before undressing and sales figures show that demand for large and x-large sized condoms is going through the roof. All because of you Mr. Penis Exercising Man. For the hours, months and years spent tugging, jelqing and nurturing that special little friend. For your firm and throbbing commitment that proved once and for all that Big thingies do indeed come in small packages, For proving that its not necessarily how you "feel" but rather how you "fill" her that counts. We'll never see you crouching in the corner with your back turned to other would be defecators and urinators. You'll be the guy whipping it out with pride, not crouching and cowering to hide. For years to come, men will be admiring themselves in the mirror and as their massive manhood hangs heavy and low, they will be thinking of you. Truly a Penis Utmost Deserving, for all you do Mr. Penis Exercising Man, this PUD's for you.
I think I speak for everyone Aaron, when I say Thank you so much!!!
(Please read to the tune of the "Budweiser Real Men of Genious" jingle)
For getting such a firm grip on a sensitive subject. For passionately stroking the small frail egos of so many men. For giving men all over the world the hope and prospect of a better self, a bigger self and a bulging self. For helping to fulfill as well as fully fill the vast voids in so many women's lives as well as their panties. For boldly reaching out with that which no man had reached out with before, at least no further than six inches or so. For challenging the very laws of nature and genetics without once ever harming a guinea pig or lab rat. And for giving men the opportunity to stand out and even stick out inches above and beyond the rest. Its as though you've helped rebuild them. made them Harder, Longer, Thicker and Stronger than they were, and you didn't have to spend six million dollars doing it. That's right Mr. Penis Exercising Man, thanks to you men are no longer hiding in restroom corners when they pee. Many men are no longer turning the lights out before undressing and sales figures show that demand for large and x-large sized condoms is going through the roof. All because of you Mr. Penis Exercising Man. For the hours, months and years spent tugging, jelqing and nurturing that special little friend. For your firm and throbbing commitment that proved once and for all that Big thingies do indeed come in small packages, For proving that its not necessarily how you "feel" but rather how you "fill" her that counts. We'll never see you crouching in the corner with your back turned to other would be defecators and urinators. You'll be the guy whipping it out with pride, not crouching and cowering to hide. For years to come, men will be admiring themselves in the mirror and as their massive manhood hangs heavy and low, they will be thinking of you. Truly a Penis Utmost Deserving, for all you do Mr. Penis Exercising Man, this PUD's for you.
I think I speak for everyone Aaron, when I say Thank you so much!!!
I really thought this would go over better.......I feel I failed somehow...........
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