This is embarrassing but I need some advice.

[ne0natas Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close ne0natas]

Okay, I'm hoping to get mostly women's opinions here. Although I have a pretty good idea on what most of the opinions will be, I'm going to ask anyway. Would you date a 34 year old man if he was still living at home? And when I say at home I mean with parent and or parents. I really want to start dating again as it has been a while but I find myself to be in this situation still. Long story short, 6 years ago I became very mentally ill. Horrible depression and anxiety that caused me to lose just about everything. I've slowly started to get better in the past few years but I have a ways to go. I'm working part time and going to school part time. I am just very lonely. Like I said, I want to start dating again but I'm afraid nobody will give me the time of day. I'm open to your thoughts, and would greatly appreciate them.

[Boosie Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Boosie]

It sucks that people think about that so much..

[Jay1983 Senior MemberMember of the Month Apr 2014, Sept 2016 Find all posts View Profile Close Jay1983]

It sucks that people think about that so much..

I'm one of them. lol

[ne0natas Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close ne0natas]

One of what Jay? You still live at home too?

[BigO AdministratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close BigO]

It depends on the living arrangement, if they are supporting you and you dont pull your load then I would say yes, that would be a problem for many ladies. If you are self sufficient, have a job and are furthering your education like you say then dont worry too much. I see many more adults living at home with their parents now.

I also know a few people that live with their parents because the parents need their help. I could live with my dad and pull ass if I were single.

[Toadstool Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Toadstool]

Look, you have bigger problems on your plate than who you're dating. It sounds like it'd be better for your if you just worked on your own issues and found pleasant company with yourself.

[ne0natas Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close ne0natas]

I've been working on things for a while now. Hell, I even quit smoking, after having smoked for over 20 years. Do you know how hard that is? Even more so for a person who suffers from a mental illness. Also, I've found company with myself for 2 years now. Honestly I'm probably going to have to work on things every day of my life. People constantly have to work on things. So I'm just suppose to go through life alone Toadstool?

[brainhack13 Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close brainhack13]

I'm sorry to shatter your hopes. I'm not a woman, but I will still share my two cents.

Look at you man. You're living with your parents, so what? Women's attraction circuits aren't hardwired to the amount of money in your bank account, the kind of car you drive, or whether or not you have your own pad. Those are all secondary. Trust me on this. Your situation's all messed-up. Does that mean that you also need to be a wimp and cry about it? So, you wanna date? Then do something about it. Be an alpha. Be a man that leads. Show them women that you are in control of your situation, not the other way around. Confidence my friend, look it up in the dictionary.

Things Women Are Attracted To (Subconsciously) :
1.) Preselection - showing that you have been preselected by other women. In this case, you need to show it via stories temporarily. But remember, storytelling and bragging are 2 different things. There's a thin line separating the two. Always just be on the safe side.

2.) Protector of loved ones - tell them how you care about your mom, your sister, your aunt, anyone. There's nothing wrong with that. That shows them how you treat women in your lives.

3.) Leader of men - lead the men, and the women will follow. If you can't do it upfront, use storytelling.

4.) Willingness to emote - show them that you're normal. That you have emotions. Not some chump talking to them, always smiling. Frown if you feel like. Laugh hard if you want. Be normal. Just don't cry. Seriously.

*credits go to The Mystery Method.


And hey, if you're planning to make up stories (or hesitating doing so), remember this. In the field, there's no true and untrue stories. It's not lying. It's flirting. (The Game, baby!)

Shoot me a PM if you have questions. Always willing to help.

[ne0natas Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close ne0natas]

Thanks for your input brainhack. Yes, confidence is something I do need to work on more. I know this and plan on taking more steps to improve it.

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Alpha argggggh.

[aBone2pick Senior Member Member of the Month July 2014 Find all posts View Profile Close aBone2pick]

Alpha argggggh.

Hahaha, I feel like I accidentally just logged into "Bodybuilding.com", and clicked forums. Girls don't want an alpha, but they do want some of the traits loosely associated with being an alpha. These would be: confidence, assertiveness, decision making, courage (when the situation arises), and possibly an unwillingness to go to the doctor when you are ill.

[MrsLooking4more Retired Super Moderator Member of the Month Feb 2013PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close MrsLooking4more]

It depends on the living arrangement, if they are supporting you and you dont pull your load then I would say yes, that would be a problem for many ladies. If you are self sufficient, have a job and are furthering your education like you say then dont worry too much. I see many more adults living at home with their parents now.

I also know a few people that live with their parents because the parents need their help. I could live with my dad and pull ass if I were single.

I agree with this statement, specially in the last few years where the economy such as it is has made it so that many people have moved back home (male or female) but function more like roommates per say.

[Subro Member Find all posts View Profile Close Subro]

I would be surprised if a thread of this nature were to avoid at least one alpha/pua comment

[brainhack13 Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close brainhack13]

I would be surprised if a thread of this nature were to avoid at least one alpha/pua comment

What's wrong with being one???

[MrBigDick Retired ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close MrBigDick]

OK, I will share my story briefly because I can relate to the OP minus the mental health issues. I'm 42 and have resided with my mother for the better part of the past 8 years since my marriage came to an end. I spent a year living in Seattle and it was an awesome year but I have two kids to help raise so I moved back to SoCal.......a place I fucking despise, so I could get my kids raised.

I used to think like you man and for YEARS I thought "who's going to want to date a guy who lives with his mother?". You'd actually be surprised. I got to the point where I started telling women UP FRONT about my living situation because if they were anything less than understanding, then they weren't worth my time investment and it was "check please". I met someone unbelievable about 2 months ago and we've been very happy ever since. She accepts me and loves me for me and accepts my living arrangement. It's not my preferreed arrangement and it won't last forever. My mom is elderly and does need some help and she's getting close to 80 years old.

There are women out there who will date you bro so don't sell yourself short. You're working part time and going to school part time so it's not like you're doing nothing with your life. You suffered a set back and you're working on wellness and THAT is what counts and if a given woman can't understand or accept that, then fuck her, she isn't worth your time. If you want to date, bro, go for it! You are entitled to find the happiness you want and if you want female companionship, brother, go for it. Work on your confidence and have thick skin because the rejection out there until you find the right one can be fierce. Good luck man.