Solved routine cure my premature ejaculation - Feedback needed - Will post progress.

[JanTantra Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JanTantra]

Haven't edged the last two days since my girlfriend was ill, so she didn't left the house, however we tried to have sex yesterday before bedtime. It was slow due to her stomach pains, and I did notice a bit better control than I used to, since it was slow I focused on not IK when penetrating, and I felt I had kinda good control. Unfortunately we never got up to speed because we had to stop due to her pains. I totally accepted that and just stopped without any questions and without being aroused and feel the need to finish. So we just kissed and cuddled, it was kinda nice actually. And I really felt she like me being in better not so over-aroused control.

Any way todays edging session alone
It was a really nice session today. I started out with my new routine. However I wanted a long session today, so started with 10 minutes rubbing instead og 7 minutes, then 10 minutes stroking. Lastly I took 25 minutes of free play with DeathGrip at the tip of penis, rubbing, ballooning etc. and I was really enjoying it. I had one real PONR where I had to stop all stimulation and do a hard reverse-kegel, I was so close to PONR that I found it hard to do the reverse-kegel, but at one point I just relaxed which resulted in a small regular-kegel and then right back in reverse-kegel. It felt like I was kinda catching the IK and arousal with a regular-kegel and then just immediately slammed a touchdown in the ground with a reverse-kegel. It was so great and I was just lying there and smiling while I hold the reverse-kegel. There did come a lot of pre-cum, but it was totally clear in color, not white as usual. I just dried it off and continued edging, since I was stille very much erected.

I would normally have done only tip DeathGrip (see the GIFs) in my last post. However I found a new way to really be on the edge of PONR which I wanted to explore some more. I stretched the sheets on the duvet and which a tight grip around my penis I was grinding the head of my penis against the sheets. I found that my pee-hole is actually my most sensitive spot. And grinding it against the sheet was much more intense then when I rub it with my hand palm. I almost had the feeling like 5 seconds before I cum with a blowjob, were I feel my whole body wants to shake. At first I could only hold 10 seconds before I needed to do some other stimulation, but slowly I build up to 30 seconds while being relaxed. I will work more on that since it was almost like an intense PONR.


All in all a really great session today.

[theGOAT Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close theGOAT]

Keep going!

[JanTantra Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JanTantra]

Awesome 60min session today!

Today I had an awesome edging session. 60 minutes without ejaculating and not feeling bored once. I had the feeling of cuming very much of the time, but in control and didn't. 60 minutes without ejaculating at the end is not what makes the session feel freaking awesome, it was the fact that I enjoyed it so much and that I was completely abled to relax and stay on the edge for very long time with only small breaks. It was amazing.

I must say that dmizzle is on to something when he says that DeathGrip is not the only way to go, but in fact just enjoy the very moment on the edge and learn how to relax and stay there is the key.

I did however spice it up with DeathGrip and especially the new 'rubbing penis head against duvet' trick (mentioned in previous post). The duvet-trick is so cool, it feels like when I am almost cuming in a blowjob, where I begin to tense my abs and feel an urge to shake a bit in my body. At the beginning I could only hold this for 10 seconds, but as the edging session progress I could take the stimulation directly on the head for 2-3 minutes maybe more and still be able to enjoy it and not be afraid to ejaculated even though I felt it really close to PONR and really intense stimulation. With more sessions likes this one, I really feel confident that I will beat this PE with time.

Also the fact that it is so enjoyable really motivates me, I can only imaging how such a session on the edge would feel in real sex.

Thanks dmizzle, at first I must say that I found the advices of being close to the edge the entire time a bit too spiritual, but I really see the benefits now, and think that this will also help 'desensitize' a bit or more proper way of saying it, is maybe just getting used to the nice stimulations without feeling the need to kegel and ejaculate.

Cool cool session, can't wait for the next.

[PaulC Member Find all posts View Profile Close PaulC]

Well done I've been a bit off the boil in last week and a bit, so really getting back on it tonight and wanting to get that 60min session!

[JanTantra Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JanTantra]

Had another session for 40 minutes yesterday, not quite as good as my previous. I didn't feel quite the same control, but at least I now know what to aim for. Also I ejaculated in the end which was not intended. However I was on 11th day without having ejaculated, so I just guess to much was build up inside me. I just need to keep practicing.

Also my new Fleshlights have arrived, together with the Fleshligt warmer. I look forward to test them out. I have read somewhere that they should be really intense when heated.

[JanTantra Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JanTantra]

Hi. I’m glad the site got back up again.
(Still struggling with a lots of ‘max_user_connections’-errors though).


Meanwhile my ordered fleshlights (Stoya Destroya and Obession Bliss) arrived and I have had some chances to test them out. Until now I have just tried them one at a time in different sessions, however today I tested out all three together (Had the STU already) to compare and help others decide which one to use.




Fleshlight review and tips.
The STU was my first fleshlight. I got it 4 months ago and the first time I tried it, it felt really good and I struggled not to ejaculate within minutes when using it. At this point I have worked my self up to be able to fuck it for 30 minutes in a decent pace when standing up and thrusting into it. I am still struggling to fuck it for longer intervals when lying down in missionary even though I have tried many times now, that was the reason I bought the new Stoya and the Bliss in the hope that they were more intense. The theory was that if I could handle them while thrusting standed, then the STU would be easier to handle in missionary.


My first impression was that It seems that the Stoya and the Bliss are better quality than the STU, the skin color is more realistic and also I feel that the Stoya is a bit tighter. However I must say that I do not feel the same crazy intensity like the whole wide web seems to talk about when using Stoya and Bliss. They are kinda similar to the STU, so if you already have one I would just recommend to stick with that.


As you whom follows my progress log know, I am currently training with a dry DeathGrip, hence I also want the fleshlight to be tighter. I made some research and ended up purchasing some different o-rings to add on the fleshlight insert to make it tighter, and indeed it made a great difference, see the picture below.

http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4070/...533fcc4ffd.jpg


I tried o-rings of different inner sizes. 35mm, 40mm, 45mm and 50mm (the width of the rings was 4mm). My penis is 18cm in length and 14cm in girth when erect. The 35cm was too tight, but the 40mm and 45mm was nice (I am still thinking about which one to use, in the 40mm I could feel when I entered the ring quite a lot, but it was also a bit hard. With the 45mm it was more natural though still tight.) The 50 was not tight enough, I think.


Using the o-rings I would recommend buying the Stoya and use o-rings on it, but if you have any of the fleshlights already I think, just buy the o-rings, they are cheap so try them out first.




Fleshlight review turned into 2 hours great edging session.
The tryout of the fleshlights turned into a really great 2 hour session of edging and I didn’t ejaculate. I noticed that it was most intense the first 10 minutes, but from there I ended up just enjoying the whole session without IKs, I did however had to stop sometimes when my focus on the stimulation got me too close to the edge. So I should work more on my arousal and bring that down without stopping. But after an hour I just fucked wild and crazy, I was tired afterwards. It was mostly standing since I have the best control standing. I would love to do that during real sex.



In the session I noticed the following things that push me towards the edge:

- First 10 minutes is most intense, after I come close to PONR and stop and relax I can go for a long time afterwards. I need to train my ‘cold start’ and not getting to close to PONR the first 10 minutes.

- When focusing too much on the sensation and focus on the deep rhythm where I have a tendency to steady increase the pace without being ready for it.

- When i am lying on my back and holding the fleshlight while I wrist my hand, such that I get a lot of friction on frenulum, it feels like my girlfriend rides me. It pushed me to PONR in seconds, I need to train for that.

- Missionary is the worst position for me, so any advice on how to relax in that position would be great. I tense my body in that position which pushes me towards PONR.




All in all a really nice session, but I indeed have some things to work on, however I do feel improvements while edging. I have also seen small improvements during real sex, however not really consistent enough yet, but more on that in a later post.

[JanTantra Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JanTantra]

Hi.

It has been long time since I last posted here. The site seems to be fully up and running again, so I will begin to post a little more.

In the 3 weeks since last post I have practicing 2 weeks DeathGrip as usual and can now control the IKs almost completely while masturbating with dry DeathGrip.

Hence I began to practicing with the Fleshlight where I wrist my hand such that I get a lot of friction on my frenulum. It is hard to control, so I have dedicated this week as a kickstart to learn to control it. My girlfriend is out of town with work, so I have been practicing 3 times a day, before work, right after work and before bedtime, 1 hour each time. I do feel improvements. I can now after a warmup of 10-15minutes fuck it in a good pace, also when I stand in kneeling doggy style.

I do actually enjoy it, it is more fun with the fleshlight than with DeathGrip, however I must say that without the intense months of DeathGrip were I learned to control the IKs, I do not think that I would be ready for the fleshlight.

When I come close to PONR the first time I try to decrease the stimulation just enough to not cum, it gets really intense and sometimes I end up just moving the fleshlight half and inch back and forth while I slowly manage to lower my arousal. This way I believe I learn two things; 1. lower my arousal while still being stimulated. 2. getting more used to stay around the pleasure near PONR without going over the edge.

After the 1-3 minutes practicing near PONR, the remaing 45 minutes is just nice and easy. I use the remaining time to learn the feeling of my body relaxing such that I can train to come in that state without the need to first go to PONR and play on the edge, which I know is much harder during real sex.

Well I feel I am on the right track and believe I should just keep practicing. I will let you know when my girlfriends gets back home, and can't wait to practicing edging using her pussy and see if I can benefit from the things I have learned.

Also a little note: I do not ejaculate while during edging alone, I only ejaculate with my girlfriend and sometimes I don't ejaculate together with her either, just to gets used to not always think about ejaculating in the end.

[Idontwannecome Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Idontwannecome]

Just wanted to say I'm following youre thread!
Looking forward to see if it helped to last longer with you're gf!
Good luck man!

[JanTantra Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JanTantra]

Finally some real progress during sex.

The Fleshlight week was fantastic. I did it three times a day for one hour. When waking up, when coming home from work and before bedtime. I ejaculated the very first time I started out, maybe I was to excited about the coming week, but didn't ejaculate all the other times.

Been practicing from monday to friday after work my plan was to allow myself to ejaculate, but didn't get the time before I was going to pick my girlfriend up. I was a little nervous on how I would perform because of 5 days without ejaculation, but turned it positive and though to my self that if I could handle all that hours of Fleshlight use, I could also handle sex now.

And it worked, I have much more control now. I still can't fuck fast, but in kneeling missionary where I thrust in her gently while stimulating her clitoris and can now stay in control, if only for a small break of 4-5 seconds while I continues stimulating her clitoris. Also in normal missionary I can thrust slowly for longer time than before.

My girlfriend was not in the mood to orgasm because she was tired after a long trip back home, so I decided to not ejaculate either and share our orgasms together later instead. The next morning we tried again, but she was still not in the mood so I stopped. The same day at the evening we tried again and had really great sex, and I did do much more thrusting than I normal would. It was great, when she orgasmed while a was stimulating her clitoris while thrusting a little bit back and forth I couldn't hold it and ejaculated. Afterward I thought I might should have stopped to learn how to control near PONR while having real sex, but that must be another time.

Yesterday I also had great sex and what felt like a break through was that I could really feel my orgasm building up, like I could feel the need to ejaculate builded up much more slowly than normal, it took maybe 20 seconds from I felt the need to ejaculate before I actually did it, and I could feel my pelvic floor slowly began to tense up. I even said loud to my girlfriend "I am coming now" and then from their it still took 5 seconds. It was really great. My girlfriend had orgasmed during clitoris stimulation at that time so I allowed my self to ejaculate, but next time I experience that I will force my self to stop and get my arousal down, and then try again.


Another long post from me, but I try to write down every detail, it helps me remember what to improve and maybe it will help another guy like me also.


Unfortunately I cannot do 3 times Fleshlight a day when my girlfriend is home, but I strive to do it 4 times a week instead. I will continue working on feeling the orgasm building up and force my self to stop and cool down or even stay near the PONR while having sex. I will say to my self 3 times near PONR and staying there during real sex and then I must ejaculate if I feel for it.

[theGOAT Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close theGOAT]

Good Job, well deserved

[JanTantra Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JanTantra]

Hi

It has been a while since I last posted in my progress log, however I have been reading the forum silently anyway the past 3 weeks. Last time I told that I would try to train with the fleshlight 4 times a weeks for an hour. Unfortunately I haven't had the time for it, however when I have 30minutes for my self I do deathgrip hard and fast, both dry and lubed. And when my girlfriend is in bath at the mornings I sometimes do deathgrip to for 10-15minutes very fast.

I have began to like the tingling sensation when it goes hard and fast and while using the deathgrip dry and lubed. I can now stay on the edge without fearing to cum. When I have the time I do it for 1 hour just staying on the edge and performs a very light reverse kegel just to relax. It is a really great feeling.

In sex I now also have much better control. I have began to move much of my practice into real sex now, I normally have sex for 30 minutes now with penetration all the way through (Off course with some small breaks where we just kiss and moves very slowly). In kneeling missionary where she has her legs up in the air I can now thrust in her quite fast and hard without cumming, Also in missionary where I am supporting on my straightened arms I have quite good control. However I do have to slow down sometimes, but not like a complete stop.

In doggy I have better control to, however I am still struggeling with it. Sometimes I have tried to go sooo close to the edge that I almost couldn't stop and then just relax completely and perform a reverse kegel, and often I just feel like i little bit of presperm is running out, but not much.. And after that I can continue really hard and fast for a long time, but when I feel this control I usually stop before I ejaculate because my girlfriend normally has had an orgasm before I get to this point. (I rub her clitoris to get her off mostly). When I get in better control with this trick and can do it every time I will begin to do it before she orgasm because I feel she want it harder before she orgasm than after.

All in all I see very good progress now, and I do not see my self with premature ejaculation anymore, I feel normal now. Even though I can't fuck her as hard and fast without breaks as I would like, I still feel that I have improved so much which gives me alot of confidence.

I have still not achieved my goal of thrusting very fast, deep and hard for a solid 3 minutes in doggy style, but I am pretty sure I will achieve it if I follow my current path.

[JanTantra Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JanTantra]

Moving edging into real sex

In my post above, I mention that I now mostly practice during real sex. I felt that I needed to explain some more details about that:

- First of all, my girlfriend knows that I would like to last longer. I told her that it is not only for her pleasure, but also for my own, since I would like stronger orgasms. (Telling her that it is was for myself also, seemed to make her really enjoy the 'travel' to a 30 minute man, off course there is also an element of power in taking your woman hard, that gives some satisfaction, but you do not need to tell her that, personally I feel that it only puts more pressure on you).

- Second, I had a tendency to stress a bit and try to make my girlfriend orgasm as fast as possible because I knew that I couldn't last that long, so I would make sure that she had an orgasm before me. I have completely stopped that. Now I instead thrust slowly and sometimes a bit faster in her and kisses her for a long time, slowly as foreplay. It gives me better control and I get used to the sensation. Also she enjoys the more relaxed way of having sex now. I feel that I have gradually improved the time I can thrust without breaks using this method.

- Third, find the position that you have the best control in and stay in that. Do not rush it, just stay in it and maybe when you get more advanced play with the sensation on the edge and take it down again with a little break. However if it gets to excited in a position, then try to switch to another, while doing it try to stretch your penis down and perform a reverse kegel, it helps me to reset my excitement.

- Fourth, this has helped me alot, but is more advanced and I usually only play with it after my girlfriend has orgasmed. I had a tendency to go in some form of primal state when I knew that my girlfriend has orgasmed and that it now was my turn to orgasm, I had no control and just went faster and faster for 20-30 seconds before ejaculating. Now when I know it is my turn to ejaculate I try to still go slowly and then gradually build it up, I do however in the middle of it try to go really fast to get the feeling of it, but when I then feel the urge to ejaculate I stop completely and tray to hold it in without using a regular kegel, but instead a very light reverse kegel. Sometimes I also just build it up slowly and then try to take it slowly down in tempo again when I feel the urge to orgasm, sometimes it works and I can then continue for longer time, and sometimes it fails and then I just have a nice orgasm that is intense because I really feel what is going on.


-- If you have any other ideas that you are using, then please let me know


Lastly: DO NOT FORGET, sex is much more dynamic than solo edging and you do not always control every movement, hence it is very important to not get too frustrated if you fail. It is like every other practice you will fail, but when you have failed try thinking of what went wrong, such that you can try to adjust for it next time. Also if you manage to get frustrated, do not show it to her, just finish her off afterwards and playing it cool. Otherwise she will also she it as a problem, or maybe she do not want to have sex that often because she do not like to see her lover getting sad afterwards. Maybe she even think that something is wrong with her, yes women are wonderful.

[JanTantra Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close JanTantra]

As a sidenote my current routine is now:


- Fast DeathGrip whenever I have the change to enjoy myself.

- If I have an hour or more I switch between lubed DeathGrip and Fleshlight, mostly combined in same session.

- I always strive not to ejaculate while edging alone, sometimes I don't even do it in real sex.

- In my edging sessions I breath deep and controlled and ensures that I do not tense my body when feeling pleasure.

- Deep resting squat. (Do it for at least a month and I believe you will see improvements.)


The new thing that I have adopted is the deep resting squat, it has been mentioned many times on this forum and I really feel that it makes a difference. I do not perform tennis ball massage anymore, I didn't really feel that I saw progress using it, but after I switched to resting squats with a light reverse kegel in the bottom position I really feel a much more relaxed pelvic floor. I try to take my knees more out, since I feel a better stretch in the pelvic floor this way.

And lastly the greedy details, which I mention just in case there is one like me somewhere As I mention in my very first post I have had some trouble with hemorrhoids, however with better diet and some fiber supplements my digestive system has become better, also to ensure my pelvic floor is relaxed after a bathroom visit I have even made it a habit to perform a resting squat for 1 minute with a light reverse kegel in the bottom position. This helps tremendously.

[RalphPhoLauren Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close RalphPhoLauren]

Great to see you back Jan, how long do you hold your deep squats?

[rapid Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close rapid]

Congrats on your success. what do you think that which thing was the main source for your improvement? edging or deathgrip or any other thing?