Dating Profile Review

[KMWylie Senior MemberPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close KMWylie]

If you have a dating site profile that you'd like some honest feedback on, feel free to post the content here.

Please COPY AND PASTE the content into your post -- do NOT link to a site.

If you'd like to include photos for review - AKA "Is this a good photo to use?" - feel free. But, if you're just wanting someone to review the actual written content, that's OK too.

REVIEWERS - Be honest, but kind. Yes - that's possible! :-)

[okayok Banned Find all posts View Profile Close okayok]

If I pm you my pictures will you keep them confidential?

[cotto007 Senior Member Member of the Month Feb 2018 Find all posts View Profile Close cotto007]

Awk come on okayok .. Follow the instructions, we could all offer some insight. Do you want to nail this profile or what? You could end up with a lot more replys

[closed251 Senior Member Member of the Month Nov 2016 Find all posts View Profile Close closed251]

I don't think you can pm pictures. But you could put them in album and mark it so only your friends can see them.

[okayok Banned Find all posts View Profile Close okayok]

If i post my chat with a girl would you guys help me out?

[KMWylie Senior MemberPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close KMWylie]

Sure - you can post it on this thread.

[Holm Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Holm]

The only dating app I use is Tinder. Been at it for about a year now, but have never actually met any of my matches (although that's partly the fault of my own priorities). I get matches every now and then, but it seldom progresses very far beyond the phase of just getting to know the basic facts about each other. I live quite secluded, on the outskirts of a fairly small town, in a region of mostly farmland, so most women I come in contact with are usually about 1-1.5 hours drive away. Before I go out on a journey for a date, I'd like to be fairly sure we at least actually like each other first. But most women don't seem to have a patience for that.

Anyways, these are my photos on Tinder. I truly despise taking selfies of myself, so these are pretty much the only pictures I have available, accumulated over the course of the last 4 or 5 years. (bottom of post)

My profile text goes something along the lines of:
"Newly arrived Norwegian in xxxxxxxxx (name of Swedish town).

Awesome at cooking food, massages, can play two instruments, speak four languages, and going to be best friends with your dad."

Cringy, I know. Might come off as a bit of bragging, too. But at least I know I'm good for it. Maybe not the last part, though, but I'd like to think it helps exclude the women with "daddy issues" and those who aren't interested in an actual relationship. My motivation for being on Tinder is not to find cheap thrills and casual sex, so it hopefully serves some purpose.


Feel free to come with any criticism or advice. Would really appreciate it!

[master-gauge Senior Member Member of the Month May 2016 Find all posts View Profile Close master-gauge]

^^^ Kinda know the whole gotta drive situation too.. Remote areas are very hard to pick up in, they don't want to come out and they are impatient when u have to travel in.. That's one reason I am looking at moving..

[TheGreatDivider Senior Member Member of the Month Dec 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close TheGreatDivider]

Holm, me not advice would be to not use Tinder. It's a waste of time if you're looking for a real relationship, because most of the women on there on going to choose based on ego (looks) instead of compatibility. And don't get me wrong, you're a good looking guy! I just don't think Tinder is right for you.

Other than that, I can help you with the wording a bit. You got the right idea about what to put in your profile but it's not quite right, it's missing that "Wow!" factor. Your first two pictures look great but I would drop the last two. For some reason you remind me of the lead singer from Silver Chair from the late 90's. Again, you're handsome guy.... And you got the whole outdoorsy thing working for you. I could help you out if I knew what you were looking for.

And the best friends with her dad line has to go. I see what you're going for but it reads like you might be really clingy. You can weed out the damaged girls without that and work in a sense of humor with a better headline, but you don't want to seem like you're too willing to commit or you will attract the crazy girls. It's hard to explain this in a post but there is a double standard for men on dating sites. If you offer everything a woman would want in the perfect guy you will get passed over, and if you seem like an absolute dick you will attract the veteran singles and crazy girls on there. You have to just tick some of those boxes and make a profile that seems interesting but mysterious, you have to say one thing but mean another... It's confusing.

[KMWylie Senior MemberPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close KMWylie]

Holm,

I have a couple of girlfriends that use Tinder, and they complain the guys they match with are flaky about communicating. Like the guy responds really irregularly - like they go days without messaging back. Inconsistency in communication is a big turn off for most women. We want to feel like you're interested in us - we want to be pursued.

NOTE: There's a fine line - we don't want someone to smother us, but we want to be wanted.

Your pics are good. They show you're outdoorsy and fun. Plus, you're a good looking guy.

Although TGD is right, that Tinder is highly focused on looks, let's be honest, that's dating in general. Go to a bar and you're not going to even think about approaching someone you don't at least find somewhat physically attractive. All dating sites have profile pictures that is what is going to either get someone to read your profile or pass on to the next one.

I would definitely change the wording of your profile - specifically the great at massages bit. Most women equate massages with wanting to have sex. That could be a little turn off - because it kind of sounds like you're looking for a hook up, and many women feel like guys on Tinder are just looking for a hook up (but, they're all hoping to find the rare gem that's actually looking for a relationship).

I'd also reconsider the "best friends with your dad" part. If I'm on Tinder, I'm not looking to set up my dad - I want someone that's going to be best friends with me!

I like the great at cooking part, as well as the instruments and languages. It's not braggy at all. I'd talk about things you like/like to do. I'd also add what you're looking for - especially if you're looking for a relationship.

It's understandable that you want to get to know someone a little bit, before driving so far... but, you may have to make that investment sooner, rather than later. Again, women want to feel like you're interested in them. If you're not willing to drive a little way to meet them, it's going to feel to them like you're not really serious about them. However, driving an hour just to meet them for coffee... well, that shows some really interest.

Those are my suggestions.

[Dangler Senior Administrator☼ Wizard ☼ White Tiger Award 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Dangler]

"Has money, missing parts, needs love. Sometimes incoherent and cranky"
PO Box 5

[LeafyGreens Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close LeafyGreens]

I've never done online dating, but I've helped some friends with theirs.

My opinion (and it seems to work well for my friends) is that the profile should be pretty brief with focus on cool things that you have DONE or ABLE TO DO that are specific, display your personality traits, and illustrate how you are an interesting person.

So for example:
I like to travel - WRONG
Last year I followed one of my passions and raveled to Greece, Italy, and Japan - BETTER

I love working on cars - WRONG
I spent the last few evenings rebuilding a 1978 Mustang engine - BETTER

Similarly the profile pictures should show you actively engaging in interesting activities or with interesting people. Static pictures of you just standing still smiling aren't going to be super helpful for most people.

The guy who posted a lot of outdoorsy pics earlier is on the right path with those pics, assuming he is looking to attract women who are into outdoorsy stuff.

[Holm Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Holm]

Holm, me not advice would be to not use Tinder. It's a waste of time if you're looking for a real relationship, because most of the women on there on going to choose based on ego (looks) instead of compatibility. And don't get me wrong, you're a good looking guy! I just don't think Tinder is right for you.

I don't know. I see a lot of women who seem genuinely interested in a serious non-shallow relationship. And I get matches from really women who look really promising, but my problem is that they either don't answer or just don't seem particularly interested in getting to know each other. My guess is that they swipe right for my pictures, and then realize they aren't interested in me after all.

Anyways, do you know of any other dating sites you could recommend over Tinder?

Other than that, I can help you with the wording a bit. You got the right idea about what to put in your profile but it's not quite right, it's missing that "Wow!" factor. Your first two pictures look great but I would drop the last two. For some reason you remind me of the lead singer from Silver Chair from the late 90's. Again, you're handsome guy.... And you got the whole outdoorsy thing working for you. I could help you out if I knew what you were looking for.

Thanks! What I'm looking for in terms of type of women? I like the old traditional type, but preferably not religious (which is rare around these parts, anyway). Women who enjoy cooking, and doing arts and crafts, and spending time in nature. Not much into party-girls, although I'd appreciate her not having a stick up her ass. And since my end-goal for starting a relationship is to build a family, I'm not looking for any career-focused women, as her main priority should be to carry our children and contribute to raising them, not to chase after some raise.

Those criteria probably weeds out about 90% of women, though. Of which maybe 10% are available online...

[Holm Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Holm]

Your pics are good. They show you're outdoorsy and fun. Plus, you're a good looking guy.

Although TGD is right, that Tinder is highly focused on looks, let's be honest, that's dating in general. Go to a bar and you're not going to even think about approaching someone you don't at least find somewhat physically attractive. All dating sites have profile pictures that is what is going to either get someone to read your profile or pass on to the next one.

I'm not sure I understand you correctly. Both of you say my pics are good, but then say Tinder is focused on looks, implying it's not the right venue for me...

I know I'm not the most well-dressed and slick-looking guy out there. Is that what you mean?

Those are my suggestions.

Thanks a lot! Noted, contemplated, and rectified.

I have a couple of girlfriends that use Tinder, and they complain the guys they match with are flaky about communicating. Like the guy responds really irregularly - like they go days without messaging back. Inconsistency in communication is a big turn off for most women. We want to feel like you're interested in us - we want to be pursued.

NOTE: There's a fine line - we don't want someone to smother us, but we want to be wanted.

A couple of weeks ago, I matched with this woman who seemed perfect in every way. Unfortunately, she only replied to my opening message, never to hear from her again. Cunning as I am, I managed to hunt down her Facebook account. Been thinking about trying to contact her there, but worried it'll be considered on the wrong side of the fine line. Being of the fairer sex yourself, how would you take such an advance?

[Holm Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Holm]

Ok, so how is this then:

"A danger to society, according to independent sources. But fairly kind for the most part.

Washed up musician, passionate nature lover, and aspiring traditional craftsman.

Will only bite if you want to."


Better? Worse? Creepy?

Might be worth mentioning that it is written in a tone of irony that might be lost in translation.