weird story of how i met a girl..and am now in love with. and some questions

[Pinoy Member Find all posts View Profile Close Pinoy]

yeah i dont see the big deal either
but good luck on this one you deserve it since you put so much into it

[captainsaveaho Member Find all posts View Profile Close captainsaveaho]

Wow man, I honestly don't even know where to start...

I have a few questions, not sure if any of this was covered in the first post cause its been deleted.

How did you meet?
How long have you been talking regularly?
Have you had any serious relationships besides her?
And most importantly, what the fuck is up with all the secrecy?!? Dude, you've been talking to her for 2 years and she says she loves you but she won't even accept your friend request on facebook?? Obviously there's something on there she doesn't want you to see, otherwise why would she care? And what reason could she possibly have for not wanting to video chat with you? I mean I get that she has trust issues, but don't you think talking face to face would be a good way to build trust?

Man, I hate to say it but in all honesty it looks to me like she's not who she says she is. I don't see any other reason for her want to hide her facebook, not want to video chat, and come up with lame excuses every time you try to arrange a visit. You say she doesn't want to see you until she's 100% sure it's not going to fail? Yeah well that's absolutely impossible, and seems to me like an indirect way of telling you that it's not going to happen. Obviously you two care about each other, no one is doubting that. The problem I (and just about everyone else) have is that she seems to have made it pretty clear that this will never turn into a real life relationship, and that's what you seem to want out of it. You also keep saying how you KNOW you can trust her and you KNOW she's being honest about everything but come on man, just think about it...do you really KNOW you can trust her, or do you just really WANT to trust her? Because in reality you can't just trust anyone and everyone, because NEWS FLASH: MOST PEOPLE AREN'T HONEST. Especially on the internet. The facebook thing and the video chat thing seem to be dead giveaways that she's not being truthful with you. I'm assuming she's sent you pictures of herself, are you sure they weren't of a friend or just some random girl? Because that probably happens more than you think.

This whole thing is eerily similar to a story I saw on TV recently...Sex-Charged Cyber Chatroom with Posed Marine Turns to Deadly Affair - ABC News .....crazy shit!

In my opinion man this thing has progressed to a point that's not healthy for you or her. She's playing games with you and it's going to slowly break you down until you can't take it anymore. You seem like a good guy, and everyone's here giving you great advice because nobody wants to see you get hurt more than you already have.

Bottom line is if she wanted this to go anywhere and was truly serious, she would be more than willing to visit with you in person....and she isn't.



Sorry if that was jumbled but I had way too much going through my head to make a concise post. It was seriously sickening reading some of that cause I can't help but put myself in your shoes...

[mistydawn Banned Find all posts View Profile Close mistydawn]

This whole thing is eerily similar to a story I saw on TV recently...Sex-Charged Cyber Chatroom with Posed Marine Turns to Deadly Affair - ABC News .....crazy shit!.

LOL...this came to mind for me too but I didn't know the names of the people involved to look it up. I saw this story done by someone else and I learned even more about it. Crazy people are out there.

I feel sick when I see women acting so badly. Females making us look bad. Just drives me nuts!

[Livin Life Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Livin Life]

JLearntolift, just read your post and put a smile on my face, finally coming around and waking up, good for you I am very happy for you.
This girl is way out there and insane, and just plain messing with your head playing some sick mental game.
Tell her the sick game is over ! I doubt but she may want to meet up with you to get you back to being weak and gullible to continue this charade.
I would choose not to meet with her and say I am sorry I met someone else and not interested anymore, just because nothing will come of it and she messed with me for soo long and say good bye and change my phone # GAME OVER !!!
Remember you are man stand up for yourself out of self respect and dignity and stay strong.
Good luck.

[Learntolift Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Learntolift]

i guess i gave her an ultimatum last night, i said you can add me on facebook, or this is over right now. guess which she chose...? yeah i have no new fb friends

then she keeps messaging me "talk to me" and trying to have a conversation..like does this chick not understand how serious i am? wtf. i remember i was like well i hope not adding me is worth it, and she said 'i already know it isnt worth it' yet she still wouldnt just add me LOL. dear jesus, and she tried to say dont take it personal, she wont even add her mom.

[Learntolift Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Learntolift]

Wow man, I honestly don't even know where to start...

I have a few questions, not sure if any of this was covered in the first post cause its been deleted.

How did you meet?
How long have you been talking regularly?
Have you had any serious relationships besides her?
And most importantly, what the fuck is up with all the secrecy?!? Dude, you've been talking to her for 2 years and she says she loves you but she won't even accept your friend request on facebook?? Obviously there's something on there she doesn't want you to see, otherwise why would she care? And what reason could she possibly have for not wanting to video chat with you? I mean I get that she has trust issues, but don't you think talking face to face would be a good way to build trust?

Man, I hate to say it but in all honesty it looks to me like she's not who she says she is. I don't see any other reason for her want to hide her facebook, not want to video chat, and come up with lame excuses every time you try to arrange a visit. You say she doesn't want to see you until she's 100% sure it's not going to fail? Yeah well that's absolutely impossible, and seems to me like an indirect way of telling you that it's not going to happen. Obviously you two care about each other, no one is doubting that. The problem I (and just about everyone else) have is that she seems to have made it pretty clear that this will never turn into a real life relationship, and that's what you seem to want out of it. You also keep saying how you KNOW you can trust her and you KNOW she's being honest about everything but come on man, just think about it...do you really KNOW you can trust her, or do you just really WANT to trust her? Because in reality you can't just trust anyone and everyone, because NEWS FLASH: MOST PEOPLE AREN'T HONEST. Especially on the internet. The facebook thing and the video chat thing seem to be dead giveaways that she's not being truthful with you. I'm assuming she's sent you pictures of herself, are you sure they weren't of a friend or just some random girl? Because that probably happens more than you think.

This whole thing is eerily similar to a story I saw on TV recently...Sex-Charged Cyber Chatroom with Posed Marine Turns to Deadly Affair - ABC News .....crazy shit!

In my opinion man this thing has progressed to a point that's not healthy for you or her. She's playing games with you and it's going to slowly break you down until you can't take it anymore. You seem like a good guy, and everyone's here giving you great advice because nobody wants to see you get hurt more than you already have.

Bottom line is if she wanted this to go anywhere and was truly serious, she would be more than willing to visit with you in person....and she isn't.



Sorry if that was jumbled but I had way too much going through my head to make a concise post. It was seriously sickening reading some of that cause I can't help but put myself in your shoes...

sorry i deleted it let me repost it, the first post that is

[Wentworth Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Wentworth]

She wont even add you on fb after 2 years? Ive got people on fb I havent even met in person lolz, shes out of her mind and playing a fucked up game with you, she definitely doesnt love you, that isnt what love is or you have a really fucked up view of love. You need to meet someone new that you can experience things with and truly know what its like to be in love with someone.

[captainsaveaho Member Find all posts View Profile Close captainsaveaho]

Have you been involved in any serious relationships before this one?

[Learntolift Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Learntolift]

not serious like this, as far as emotions go, nope

[captainsaveaho Member Find all posts View Profile Close captainsaveaho]

As was said in an earlier post, it seems like you are more in love with the idea of her than with her as a person. You want someone to love that also loves you, which is totally normal, but you seem to be trying to convince yourself that she's right for you when she obviously isn't. If you think about it, are all the justifications you have used for her actions to convince us that she's right for you or to convince yourself?

This whole thing seems to have gotten out of control, and you are so emotionally invested in her that you are bound to get hurt. Try stepping back and taking a look at the relationship from an outside perspective, it might change your opinion of her.

[Learntolift Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Learntolift]

i honestly think we are right for each other...if only we met in person from the get go instead of online. all our issues are because of this

[Learntolift Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Learntolift]

here is whats been going on lol. from her:

"what a mistake.. i hope you miss me so much it makes you sick. physically sick. i hope the thought of me consumes you. and when you realize how fucking stupid this argument is over 'principle' it'll be way too late. have fun at penn state by yourself dic.

bye."

"have fun not having me around to. it works both ways. i hope this makes you sick. facebook is so fucking dumb to fight over. you have my number, does 450+ people have my number? m'kay no. so stfu with your bullshit

bye"

[Pinoy Member Find all posts View Profile Close Pinoy]

sounds like she's being really stubborn for no reason...have you found out yet why? like her true reasons for not adding you because there must be something -____-" I know you've told me before but come on she must be hiding

[Learntolift Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Learntolift]

lol it doesnt matter. its over now

[irheretogrow Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close irheretogrow]

I'm glad its over and that you stopped with emotions, eventually you will find someone irl and be more happy !