just venting I guess (I already know its dumb)

[TTBB Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close TTBB]

I am not sold on the fact vettez you would be fine with it.. you're all screwed up over the sexual satisfaction your wife may have had when she was with this other man, i am not sure you would handle it as well as you think, being there and seeing it. There is water under the bridge now, which potentially could come into play when you see her with another man, its also a bit like having a bandaid baby to try and fix a relationship that's having issues,rarely works or is only a temporary fix ...You say you have had threesomes in the past but i am assuming they weren't with girls that you love like your wife.

You say you always wanted to in the past but you didn't think she was keen..and now she has fantasies of having other cock in the bed...what if you guys do it and she really likes it and then she wants to have more threesomes with more guys.. how are you going to cope with that? Not saying that is going to happen but what if that becomes the norm.. how do you think your ego and esteem would cope ..What i see when i read your posts is a guy looking for approval from others, a guy trying to prove himself to himself and trying to get his wives attention by posting so much detail about the sex session and his desire for her trying to make up for the neglect from before.

I would urge you to become more secure in yourself and your relationship before adding outsiders into your sexlife...The reality is if you are starting threads like this..You don't trust your wife completely yet, because if you did you wouldn't be continuously question her about this guys sexual abilities and dick size and you would trust the words and answer she has given you. so you need to fix the trust, before you include others into the lust.(couldn't resist the rhyme .hehe :P)

[NCGUY1972 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close NCGUY1972]

I wasnt worried about his abilities just the fact that his penis may have felt better than mine i do think i am over it for now. I am not pursuing a threesome at this time but if it happens down the road that is Fine. It is begining to sink into my head that we had issues and what she did was wrong but it had nothing to do with me. And the fact that my wife who doesnt drink had afew drinks and ended up with an old high school crush alone at night didnt help. Anyway im a good man and i feel pretty good about myself.

[KungFuJoe Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close KungFuJoe]

I know you guys mentioned you went to couples therapy but I think you might want some personal therapy as well. You've decided to forgive and move on. That's great but you obviously still have a lot of hang ups etc and personally I think it's very unhealthy to even consider a threesome with another male. I mean that's like dangling a bag of coke in front of a former addict.

Look into cognitive behavior therapy. It deals wih handling obsessive rumination and controlling thought patterns.

[NCGUY1972 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close NCGUY1972]

the thing is I always wanted it anyway. Why should this ruin it? Now that I know she fantasized about it thats even better. What happened in the past sucks and I cant change that. Do I let it deprive me of the future? Its ultimately up to her anyway and there are no prospective men out there right now. Again im not actively persuing a threesome right now but if it occurred in the future I will enjoy it.

[Cya at 8 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Cya at 8]

Maybe that is the answer here. Maybe you should push for a 3-some and have some fun yourself right in front of her? It might dull the pain from her cheating.... Or it might not help at all.. You are in the same boat as me with insecurities. You have to feel better about yourself first before you can properly deal with what happened.

You may have not been there emotionally but that did NOT give her the right to cheat. There is no justification for it.

[Hopeful&dedicated Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Hopeful&dedicated]

Didn't you post once that she is hesitant about a MFF threesome because she's worried about the other woman falling in love with you? If that's the case I think you two should wait until these feelings cease.

[Cya at 8 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Cya at 8]

Didn't you post once that she is hesitant about a MFF threesome because she's worried about the other woman falling in love with you? If that's the case I think you two should wait until these feelings cease.

Yeah I guess giving her pain back wouldn't be a Gandhi thing to do. I wasn't saying cause her pain, I meant that in his mind, they would be even. Ofcourse, my avatar turns into Darth Vader.. lol

[NCGUY1972 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close NCGUY1972]

We are talking mmf

[09vetteZ51'sBunny Member Find all posts View Profile Close 09vetteZ51'sBunny]

The thought of 2 men is very exciting. I wish we had realized we both shared this fantasy a long time ago. We are having fun with the fantasizing and dirty talk during sex and I am happy if it never goes beyond that. Maybe if we figured this out when life was less complicated before the kids it would have been fun to explore. I wish we had opened up to each other sooner about all of our fantasies mine and his. I am thankful we are opening up and shring everything with each other now.

[pterodactyl Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close pterodactyl]

CaptainJohnson is my favourite and the wisest of all superhero contraceptives

Mine too =)

[hooksvsbird Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close hooksvsbird]

I think if the 2 of you go down this road it could well lead to a divorce. I really would hate to see that happen.

[Cya at 8 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Cya at 8]

The thought of 2 men is very exciting. I wish we had realized we both shared this fantasy a long time ago. We are having fun with the fantasizing and dirty talk during sex and I am happy if it never goes beyond that. Maybe if we figured this out when life was less complicated before the kids it would have been fun to explore. I wish we had opened up to each other sooner about all of our fantasies mine and his. I am thankful we are opening up and shring everything with each other now.

Then I am happy for you guys. It's always exciting to have a partner who is willing to explore each other's sexuality. Good luck in your journey.

[Cya at 8 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Cya at 8]

I think if the 2 of you go down this road it could well lead to a divorce. I really would hate to see that happen.

In my experience, it very well could bring them closer together. Trust me, if you communicate and reassure your mate, it can indeed work. I know many full swingers and they are all so close and in love. The trick is not to spend much time with the other participant(s). MMF, I will admit, will test your relationship though. I still think MFF would be a better starting place. In my opinion, you sould also allow him to have fun with someone else..

[hooksvsbird Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close hooksvsbird]

In my experience, it very well could bring them closer together. Trust me, if you communicate and reassure your mate, it can indeed work. I know many full swingers and they are all so close and in love. The trick is not to spend much time with the other participant(s). MMF, I will admit, will test your relationship though. I still think MFF would be a better starting place. In my opinion, you sould also allow him to have fun with someone else..

I just don't see how that is possible. I know people say that but I know of 3 couples that went down that road and all 3 are getting divorced. I am pretty sure I could never do a Devil's threeway(MMF) . I could do a MFF but never with somebody I was involved with. It would have to be 2 randoms or at least with a Fbuddy and random.

I would probably be tempted to divorce if my wife even brought up a MMF.

[Cya at 8 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Cya at 8]

I just don't see how that is possible. I know people say that but I know of 3 couples that went down that road and all 3 are getting divorced. I am pretty sure I could never do a Devil's threeway(MMF) . I could do a MFF but never with somebody I was involved with. It would have to be 2 randoms or at least with a Fbuddy and random.

I would probably be tempted to divorce if my wife even brought up a MMF.

To each their own. I wouldn't want a MMF either but if 'Vette is into it, then you shouldn't judge that. Just like I could never do a homosexual act but I don't judge those who do.

Those who got divorced weren't communicating like they should have been. That is clear.