Treating White Knight Syndrome

[jockinthebox Retired Moderator Member of the Month May 2015PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close jockinthebox]

Besides, I've always hated the concept of White Knights, I see them as weak. Therefore the denial bit for so long. And it creates so much more issues, I think.

Makes me obsessive, and because of the fact that I perceive it as a form of weakness, I seek other ways to show my dominance. I want to know everything, I order people around and sometimes humiliate them. Same goes for sex life, where I often have very abusive fantasies.

Maybe, ultimately, it's why I'm on this forum in the first place. To make myself bigger, more intimidating.

While it IS good you are introspective and admit some of your character flaws; in the same breath you allow your anger issues to cloud your better judgement, and then take an aggressive posture, like in the statement above.

This is not going to bode well for you in life, nor on these forums I'm afraid, if you are confronted by other members who may be trying to help you. If you make rash and intimidating posts or attempt to engage other members using personal intimidation, your stay here may be brief. This is not a topic for discussion in this thread, mind you, just offering some timely guidance to you as a new member here.

[dmizzle Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close dmizzle]

Maybe you go for these women because you are insecure and they allow you to boss them around. Find a good, successful, beautiful, independent woman that doesn't need a man. Those are my favorites. Then you know they want you, not just what you can give to them. So as much as you want to be more intimidating, it's easy to intimidate the weak. Step up your game and go for real women. You want a puppet that stays with you because they need you, or a woman that wants you for you.

[Addiction Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Addiction]

Maybe you go for these women because you are insecure and they allow you to boss them around. Find a good, successful, beautiful, independent woman that doesn't need a man. Those are my favorites. Then you know they want you, not just what you can give to them. So as much as you want to be more intimidating, it's easy to intimidate the weak. Step up your game and go for real women. You want a puppet that stays with you because they need you, or a woman that wants you for you.

It isn't because he is insecure, it's because it makes him feel important to have made such a difference for a person and their life.

[Jackxxx Banned Find all posts View Profile Close Jackxxx]

How old are you?
I am just guessing, but I wonder if it could just be inexperience? I remember when I started dating, I had a inclination to be that way too. I used to feel comfortable listening to girls with problems, and start feeling for them, and developing that idea of being the one taking care of them. But after so many fuck ups of course my whole perspective changed to the point of not giving a fuck anymore which is how most people behave after so many disappointments.
So I wonder if you whole mindset would change with age and experience? Just my 0.02

[Lavian Member Find all posts View Profile Close Lavian]

Maybe you go for these women because you are insecure and they allow you to boss them around. Find a good, successful, beautiful, independent woman that doesn't need a man. Those are my favorites. Then you know they want you, not just what you can give to them. So as much as you want to be more intimidating, it's easy to intimidate the weak. Step up your game and go for real women. You want a puppet that stays with you because they need you, or a woman that wants you for you.

I am by no means successful, and I guess I find it hard to relate or share things with most successful people. I've had a relationship with gals who had their shit together, worked towards their own futures. But I just don't "fall in love", eventually we grow cold, distant. I feel embarrassed to talk about my issues with people who haven't had to deal with anything alike. So I guess there is also the insecurity thing, because I see myself of the same "level".

@Jackxxx

I'm 22. So yeah, I am young and, perhaps, relatively inexperienced. Although I always realize what am I getting myself into, and that it's pretty darn stupid.

[Jackxxx Banned Find all posts View Profile Close Jackxxx]

Yeah thats probably what it is. Dont get me wrong, I am not saying you're inexperienced compared to other guys. I mean an inexperience related to age. As you age and grow up your brain changes. The way you see things and the way you feel of course.

Also as you grow and start doing something productive with your life, your own security improves, self esteem, and you add value to yourself that will keep you away from dysfunctional girls. You will still feel for them, but you will know whats better for you and what you deserve.

[dmizzle Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close dmizzle]

I am by no means successful, and I guess I find it hard to relate or share things with most successful people. I've had a relationship with gals who had their shit together, worked towards their own futures. But I just don't "fall in love", eventually we grow cold, distant. I feel embarrassed to talk about my issues with people who haven't had to deal with anything alike. So I guess there is also the insecurity thing, because I see myself of the same "level".

@Jackxxx

I'm 22. So yeah, I am young and, perhaps, relatively inexperienced. Although I always realize what am I getting myself into, and that it's pretty darn stupid.

Thats exactly my point. You are insecure so you find women that are at the same level or lower. I don't mean that in a bad way. Let me give you an example.

When I was younger, 20ish, I was a heroin junky and convicted felon. Anyway, I completely changed my life but my past still haunted me. I dated a women, an angel. Only had sex with one guy at age 30. Perfect credit, went to a great college, wealthy parents. Anyway, she made me feel insecure, like I couldn't give her anything. I let this insecurity get to me and ruined the relationship over it.

Im the end, she didn't want anything from me. Just me. Because I was insecure, I ruined a perfect relationship. But, it also taught me that I am a very loveable person. I've learned that telling women about my issues works in my favor. They appreciate the vulnerability and honesty.

What I am suggesting to you is go for the best woman. Im not saying she has to be perfect, but don't settle for women that need to be fixed because you're too insecure to find the best woman possible. Being a white Knight usually does not end well. But do whatever you want to do.

[kickinthemebs Senior Member Member of the Month Feb 2014 Find all posts View Profile Close kickinthemebs]

Have a look at some of the MGTOW videos on YouTube about it,they are quite good.

[Addiction Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Addiction]

Thats exactly my point. You are insecure so you find women that are at the same level or lower. I don't mean that in a bad way. Let me give you an example.

When I was younger, 20ish, I was a heroin junky and convicted felon. Anyway, I completely changed my life but my past still haunted me. I dated a women, an angel. Only had sex with one guy at age 30. Perfect credit, went to a great college, wealthy parents. Anyway, she made me feel insecure, like I couldn't give her anything. I let this insecurity get to me and ruined the relationship over it.

Im the end, she didn't want anything from me. Just me. Because I was insecure, I ruined a perfect relationship. But, it also taught me that I am a very loveable person. I've learned that telling women about my issues works in my favor. They appreciate the vulnerability and honesty.

What I am suggesting to you is go for the best woman. Im not saying she has to be perfect, but don't settle for women that need to be fixed because you're too insecure to find the best woman possible. Being a white Knight usually does not end well. But do whatever you want to do.

I tried to treat my white knight syndrome by doing this. On the surface my current girlfriend had no issues whatsoever, appeared to be on a much higher level than me. Start digging deeper, as time went on, she actually showed up as being extremely fucked up. Currently though, it's actually going really well. She has taken to all the things I've been asking for and teaching her about life things. Plus she is going to make good money later and have a great standard of living, so she's worth keeping around lol

[ScarletSkull Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close ScarletSkull]

Thats exactly my point. You are insecure so you find women that are at the same level or lower. I don't mean that in a bad way. Let me give you an example.

When I was younger, 20ish, I was a heroin junky and convicted felon. Anyway, I completely changed my life but my past still haunted me. I dated a women, an angel. Only had sex with one guy at age 30. Perfect credit, went to a great college, wealthy parents. Anyway, she made me feel insecure, like I couldn't give her anything. I let this insecurity get to me and ruined the relationship over it.

Im the end, she didn't want anything from me. Just me. Because I was insecure, I ruined a perfect relationship. But, it also taught me that I am a very loveable person. I've learned that telling women about my issues works in my favor. They appreciate the vulnerability and honesty.

What I am suggesting to you is go for the best woman. Im not saying she has to be perfect, but don't settle for women that need to be fixed because you're too insecure to find the best woman possible. Being a white Knight usually does not end well. But do whatever you want to do.

This is awesome. I love your viewpoint. I suspect that this is kind of innate in both men and women (although perhaps more in men) - this desire to be "needed" but it is really unnecessary and I think the best relationships would be between two people who don't actually NEED each other... they just choose to be with each other.

[Darthic Member Find all posts View Profile Close Darthic]

This is awesome. I love your viewpoint. I suspect that this is kind of innate in both men and women (although perhaps more in men) - this desire to be "needed" but it is really unnecessary and I think the best relationships would be between two people who don't actually NEED each other... they just choose to be with each other.

Great point! I generally have this problem. Smh