Honest opinions about ethnicity

[bragz Member Find all posts View Profile Close bragz]

I've never asked a woman about this but I'm starting to become a bit anxious about not being in a relationship. It's not so much being single that's bugging me, but my inability to attract a girl that I find attractive both physically and emotionally.

Please be brutally honest, some people don't want to come across as racist but I understand that you can not control to whom you are attracted.

About me:
- I'm 21, 5'9
- I was born/raised in Australia (Indians have poor reputation here. Immigrants are seen as creeps, disrespectful towards women and as having poor hygiene - most of which is actually true for new immigrants.)
- I'm in better shape than most - I go to the gym 3-4 times a week
- I am currently at university, just having finished a Bachelor's degree
- I've been told I am anything between a 3/10 and an 8/10. From plain ugly to handsome.
- Indian descent
- Most Indian girls find me attractive, as well as some Caucasian girls, but most Caucasians and some Indians find me unattractive.

Background info:

As a teenager I lacked confidence; I was out of shape and didn't know how to speak to women. I soon got into shape, starting taking really good care of myself and worked on my anxiety. Last year I got over my anxiety and was confident enough to ask women out, and take a rejection in stride. Eventually I got into a relationship which was amazing until I found out my GF had another BF the whole time lol.

Anyway that gave me more confidence, I improved my social skills, made a bunch of new friends and became much more active socially. I started asking out women, being able to make them laugh and hold conversation, hold eye contact and everything else a confident person is supposed to do.

I've been going this way for a year, but in my happiness with my newfound confidence I completely failed to notice that out of countless approaches (and hundreds of Tinder swipes) I only got two club hookups and a single date from a girl who was working at the shopping centre (which went amazingly but she changed her mind after planning for a second date and decided she didn't want to see me any more).

In the same time, my white, overweight friend has been getting numbers for fun while coming out with me all the while having an attractive girlfriend. His ability to hold conversation is poor as far as I can tell, but he does much, much better than me.

I tried to ignore it as much as I could, I've heard things like "ew he's Indian", "Indians are creepy", "I'd never go out with an Indian", but I always thought these people were in the minority.

Another issue is that while Indian girls do find me attractive, but being raised here makes me incompatible. there's always an issue with communication if they don't speak English well, the expectation to get married ASAP, parents that don't approve, etc. I'm stuck in between two dating cultures, of which I belong in neither.

As far as I can tell, there isn't anything glaringly wrong with me so much so that girls won't give me the time of the day.

A friend of mine brought up the idea that maybe if girls find me physically attractive but I'm having such bad luck that perhaps it's the stigma of being of my ethnicity rather than the look itself (it's certainly not the culture as my parents came here young and I was born here).

TL;DR:

- Got into shape, gained confidence and approached many women in many ways
- Was so used to getting rejected and it not affecting me that I didn't realise how poorly I was doing
- Noticed my white friend attracting women effortlessly despite being out of shape and not great at holding conversation
- After a conversation with a friend it occurred to me that it may be because of my background
- Makes no difference now, but I want to confirm my suspicion that he is right.

So here are my questions for the women of PEgym:

1) Do you find men of ethnicities outside your own less attractive?
2) With all else being equal, would you choose someone of your own ethnicity over someone of another?
3) Do you find Indians less attractive than other ethnicities, such as Asians?
4) Have you ever been attracted to a man but decided to end it because of their status/ the stigma or shame of being associated with him? (Did he have a less than desirable career, was he disliked among your peers?)
5) Have you been attracted to a man but not pursued anything because of his ethnicity?
6) Have you chosen a less desirable man over another because they matched your ethnicity.
7) Do you find that the men you are attracted to from outside your ethnicity resemble men from your ethnicity?

[TheGreatDivider Senior Member Member of the Month Dec 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close TheGreatDivider]

You are way too hung up on yourself! And you're racist against yourself.

You think these women don't like you because you're Indian? Do you think your racial background was the real reason you didn't get a second date? NOOOO! Your personality, narcissism, and general neediness is creeping women out.

Get over yourself first and stop looking for women to make you happy. When you find happiness and develop a life you can be happy with you'll have them coming to you. And fuck your fat friend, you're not him... but that doesn't mean you couldn't learn a thing or two from him about not needing and being little more positive and fun when talking to women.

[aBone2pick Senior Member Member of the Month July 2014 Find all posts View Profile Close aBone2pick]

You are way too hung up on yourself! And you're racist against yourself.

You think these women don't like you because you're Indian? Do you think your racial background was the real reason you didn't get a second date? NOOOO! Your personality, narcissism, and general neediness is creeping women out.

Get over yourself first and stop looking for women to make you happy. When you find happiness and develop a life you can be happy with you'll have them coming to you. And fuck your fat friend, you're not him... but that doesn't mean you couldn't learn a thing or two from him about not needing and being little more positive and fun when talking to women.

I like most of your posts, but I think you are way off point with this one.

I don't think he's being a narcissist at all. He clearly said that he considers the possibility that some girls may even think he's a 3/10, that's not flattering in the least.

Here's my honest advice: not everyone has the tools in their kit, and for their environment, to be a lady slaying succubus. However, I don't think anyone should ever try to be one of those. Sure, your race may actually be a factor in picking up random girls, but in other instances it may help you. That being said, your race will almost never be a compounding factor in finding the girl you are going to spend the rest of your life with. That's because girls in that situation are really looking at who you are. I'm not the most handsome or ugly guy in the world. I am within the average range for height, realtively average weight, average sized penis, average or even lowish income, and I'm not done with my education, but I found a girl who loves me for who I am. She's not even close to what you would call the same race as me, and a few people from her country have spoken negative words about our relationship -- though they are few and far between.

The point is this: if you are just trying to get sex, you are going to face a lot of disappointment and rejection no matter who you are. Once you get serious about actually trying to find a nice girl and have a real relationship, aka having self-respect, you will find that your race is barely a factor at all. A girl who is genuinely interested in a relationship doesn't care what color you are on the outside, she wants to know who you are inside.

[Toadstool Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Toadstool]

I think it'd be remiss to overlook your ethnicity being a factor in your dating life. Of course it is. You'r Indian, therefore it's something to consider. An Indian guy can't go up to a girl like I would and expect the same results.
I'm just sorry I don't have any advise for you. Have you asked your girl friends about it?

A point about looks - fuck 'em. It doesn't matter how you look. Okay fine, it sorta does. If you're getting women to say you're an 8/10, then you can improve your looks with a wardrobe and behaviour change. Your personality and character are what really counts, by the way. I'm an attractive guy and I can turn girls aways faster than you can imagine if I act like a total needy wussbag. It wasn't until I started asking myself, Okay what am *I* doing here that's the problem? that things really started to kick off for me.

Your fat friend seems to be onto something. Pay very close attention to the things he does. Forget the content of his conversation. He's able to communicate in a special kind of way if he can get the results you're talking of. Look at his body language, tonality, where are his eyes, what's the conversation about? Stuff like that.
I'm also 90% sure that fatter, more overweight guys have a better chance with women than super fit or super buff guys. I think it's about how comfortable the girls are around them. I've noticed that if there's a guy in my area who is going to be abnormally good with women, he's either plumper, leading to overweight - or scrawny as all hell.

Also notice that you're improving. As time goes on, you're getting better. Stick with what you're doing, find friends who are better than you, ask them for advice and ask them questions, imitate what they're doing ... and you'll get much, much better.

As far as you worried about being Indian is concerned, I'm pretty sure it's not nearly as important as you seem to think it is. Sure it's a factor. There will be stereotypes that circulate around the white girls. There will be racism and prejudices. You'll have to overcome some of that.

[Toadstool Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Toadstool]

I like most of your posts, but I think you are way off point with this one.

I don't think he's being a narcissist at all. He clearly said that he considers the possibility that some girls may even think he's a 3/10, that's not flattering in the least.

Here's my honest advice: not everyone has the tools in their kit, and for their environment, to be a lady slaying succubus. However, I don't think anyone should ever try to be one of those. Sure, your race may actually be a factor in picking up random girls, but in other instances it may help you. That being said, your race will almost never be a compounding factor in finding the girl you are going to spend the rest of your life with. That's because girls in that situation are really looking at who you are. I'm not the most handsome or ugly guy in the world. I am within the average range for height, realtively average weight, average sized penis, average or even lowish income, and I'm not done with my education, but I found a girl who loves me for who I am. She's not even close to what you would call the same race as me, and a few people from her country have spoken negative words about our relationship -- though they are few and far between.

The point is this: if you are just trying to get sex, you are going to face a lot of disappointment and rejection no matter who you are. Once you get serious about actually trying to find a nice girl and have a real relationship, aka having self-respect, you will find that your race is barely a factor at all. A girl who is genuinely interested in a relationship doesn't care what color you are on the outside, she wants to know who you are inside.

You can see some paradigms in this guy's post.
Wanting lots of sex = no self respect
Only certain guys can get lots of women
The epitome of good relationships is monogamy

You can choose to believe these things or not. Lots of guys do. But they certainly aren't the only options available to you. I'm talking to the OP here.

[burtybasset Retired Moderator Member of the Month May 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close burtybasset]

I am Caucasian and only one Caucasian women finds me attractive and she's my wife and no Indian women do, so you are not doing as bad as you think.

If there is a negative stereotype of your particular ethnicity, pay no attention, be yourself and remain positive, people will start responding to you positively eventually, remember they are only human.

[TheGreatDivider Senior Member Member of the Month Dec 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close TheGreatDivider]

I like most of your posts, but I think you are way off point with this one.

I don't think he's being a narcissist at all. He clearly said that he considers the possibility that some girls may even think he's a 3/10, that's not flattering in the least.

Ah, but there is narcissism in neuroticism - neurotic narcissism.

Think of the two like different sides of a coin. Narcissistic pride protects the ego with a false sense of self based on whatever image they want to identify with, while neuroticism shifts blame from the self into some flaw with that image.

Think of a PUA who only feels good about himself whenever he has sex, but whenever he strikes out he blames body image. He identifies himself as a ladies man and can't bare to part with that image, and when he's not getting any action he looks to blame anything but his character traits.

This is what's basically going on here. The guy has a lot going on for him and is obviously very smart and educated, but he doesn't want to look within and self analyze for the reasons why he's not doing well in the dating scene. It's much easier to blame your problems on outward appearance and feel jealous over others success (narcissistic trait).

People who have narcissistic tendencies tend to ask a lot of "why me" questions and only agree with the answers that go along with any self-fulfilling prophecies. Ie Yeah your right, it's because you're Indian and those women are racist. Instead of looking within and going "You know, maybe there is something about me that is preventing me from responding to women that approach me or being able to approach women with confidence."

http://http://www.psychologytoday.co...her-part-three

Personally I think he's just a "nice guy" pulling the "nice guy act" and convincing himself it's his race and everything but his personality that's the vagina repellent.

When you do this you start approaching women with a negative attitude and trying to get some form of acceptance out of every interaction and expecting them to shoot you down because you're Indian. You start convincing yourself every women should want you or women would want you if you were more like that successful friend, instead of being this "nice guy". Well of course that's going to happen... If you expect to get anything out of interactions with women, you're going to end up being really needy and talking about yourself trying to further convince them and yourself you're what they should want. Or in this case he's convincing himself women don't want him because he's Indian.

I want to believe it's because he's trying to fake confidence by acting like a cocky PUA (like his friend) and it's turning women off... but it could also be that he is in such a negative place that he can't relax around women and just talk without trying to force anything.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3VXXXX9iVPI

[bragz Member Find all posts View Profile Close bragz]

You are way too hung up on yourself! And you're racist against yourself.

You think these women don't like you because you're Indian? Do you think your racial background was the real reason you didn't get a second date? NOOOO! Your personality, narcissism, and general neediness is creeping women out.

I apologise if I came across as narcissistic in the OP. It appears I have offended you, but I do think you have misinterpreted what I was trying to say.

Firstly I don't think I creeped the girl I went on a date with out. We got quite intimate after the date, we had great conversation for a few days after and she changed her mind. We still keep in touch as friends - something I don't think she would make the effort to do if I creeped her out.

I assure you I'm not racist against myself. I'm content being Indian, I love my family and friends dearly and help out the less fortunate in my home country when I can. If you're referring to my comment about immigrants, it's an objective fact that they initially don't adapt well to the cultural norms here in Australia.

I'm not sure where you get the neediness vibe though. Because I made this thread? I don't feel like I 'need' a woman to be happy. In the OP I mentioned that I went over a year with no success but it didn't get me down. It's only later on I wondered why I was doing so poorly and a friend mentioned the status thing. Like I said I've heard girls themselves mention the race thing so I can't be imagining it all.

I'm a happy person, but relationships are a big part of people's lives, and I'd rather figure out what's going on now than in 20 years time.

As for the narcissism, I did list my education/height, etc. only because I wanted to make it clear that there wasn't anything else noticeably different about me. Yes I said I'm in good shape, that's because I work out hard and I thought it was pertinent.

Ah, but there is narcissism in neuroticism - neurotic narcissism.

Think of the two like different sides of a coin. Narcissistic pride protects the ego with a false sense of self based on whatever image they want to identify with, while neuroticism shifts blame from the self into some flaw with that image.

I'm not a PUA nor do I follow anything to do with PUA. My friend isn't a PUA either.

When I said I gained confidence I meant that I was able to act as I would around my close friends with strangers. I used to be awkward and nervous around women. I had social anxiety too, when I overcame that which was hindering me at work and in studies, I was able to talk to women like a normal human and connect with them emotionally.

I don't have a negative attitude towards women at all, like I said this is all me thinking in retrospect. The ethnicity thing only came up after a year of being able to have a normal social life but struggling relationship-wise.

Or you could just be right, I could be a narcissist. But then again I don't think I'd be working so hard to improve myself constantly (and be here) if I thought I was perfect.

All I ask is that you re-read my OP with an open mind. You've given me a clinical diagnosis, labelled me a racist, and concluded that I'm miserable as a person all by reading a few paragraphs.

[bragz Member Find all posts View Profile Close bragz]

I think there's been a misunderstanding - I'm not interested in sex or one night stands. Those aren't that important. It's meaningful relationships I'm talking about.

I thought this thread might be a bad idea, every thread I've seen online about whether women prefer men of a certain height/education/physique/full head of hair/high income there's someone telling the OP that all of those things are not a factor and that the OP is probably just a piece of shit.

The point is this: if you are just trying to get sex, you are going to face a lot of disappointment and rejection no matter who you are. Once you get serious about actually trying to find a nice girl and have a real relationship, aka having self-respect, you will find that your race is barely a factor at all. A girl who is genuinely interested in a relationship doesn't care what color you are on the outside, she wants to know who you are inside.

Just to clarify, I wasn't saying it's possible that girls see me as a 3/10, I'm saying that some have literally said so.

You're probably right and I'm overthinking it. But judging by how everyone thinks it's just sex I'm after maybe that's how I'm coming across in my attempts to set up dates?

I just have a hard time meeting single women organically, so I approach women and have conversations and at the end ask for a number if they seem nice. Maybe that's the trademark of a PUA and that's what I'm being confused for?

I think it'd be remiss to overlook your ethnicity being a factor in your dating life. Of course it is. You'r Indian, therefore it's something to consider. An Indian guy can't go up to a girl like I would and expect the same results.
I'm just sorry I don't have any advise for you. Have you asked your girl friends about it?

You can see some paradigms in this guy's post.
Wanting lots of sex = no self respect
Only certain guys can get lots of women
The epitome of good relationships is monogamy

You can choose to believe these things or not. Lots of guys do. But they certainly aren't the only options available to you. I'm talking to the OP here.

I really appreciate your advice Toadstool. I should probably spend more time taking pointers from others. I guess I can't change who I am so I should work around it.

I don't ask my girl friends because I feel like they'd try not to hurt my feelings or anything, but when they ask theirs it's overwhelmingly against everyone that's not Caucasian.

I am Caucasian and only one Caucasian women finds me attractive and she's my wife and no Indian women do, so you are not doing as bad as you think.

If there is a negative stereotype of your particular ethnicity, pay no attention, be yourself and remain positive, people will start responding to you positively eventually, remember they are only human.

I try my best to do so. And I find people are generally accepting. I just worry it might be the stigma of 'dating an Indian' (just like there is -or was- for a white girl dating a black man in the U.S.) that puts people off.

The only reason I'm confident there's an issue of race is the vastly different responses I get from Indian and non-Indian women.

[TheGreatDivider Senior Member Member of the Month Dec 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close TheGreatDivider]

Did I give you a clinical diagnosis, label you a racist, and conclude that you're a miserable person? Or did I get you to defend yourself and start thinking about the positive attributes you have and what makes you happy?

Don't fret man, I have to use a little reverse psychology with some people so they'll forget about beating themselves down and tell me what they do like about themselves. It's an ego thing... You can't hate yourself when you're ticked off at me and trying to prove me wrong.

But seriously, I think you focused entirely too much on how you're not a "narcissist" and ignored what I said about being a "nice guy". Did you play the youtube video I posted in at the bottom?

[Mrs. workin_4_it Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Mrs. workin_4_it]

I've never asked a woman about this but I'm starting to become a bit anxious about not being in a relationship. It's not so much being single that's bugging me, but my inability to attract a girl that I find attractive both physically and emotionally.

Please be brutally honest, some people don't want to come across as racist but I understand that you can not control to whom you are attracted.

About me:
- I'm 21, 5'9
- I was born/raised in Australia (Indians have poor reputation here. Immigrants are seen as creeps, disrespectful towards women and as having poor hygiene - most of which is actually true for new immigrants.)
- I'm in better shape than most - I go to the gym 3-4 times a week
- I am currently at university, just having finished a Bachelor's degree
- I've been told I am anything between a 3/10 and an 8/10. From plain ugly to handsome.
- Indian descent
- Most Indian girls find me attractive, as well as some Caucasian girls, but most Caucasians and some Indians find me unattractive.

Background info:

As a teenager I lacked confidence; I was out of shape and didn't know how to speak to women. I soon got into shape, starting taking really good care of myself and worked on my anxiety. Last year I got over my anxiety and was confident enough to ask women out, and take a rejection in stride. Eventually I got into a relationship which was amazing until I found out my GF had another BF the whole time lol.

Anyway that gave me more confidence, I improved my social skills, made a bunch of new friends and became much more active socially. I started asking out women, being able to make them laugh and hold conversation, hold eye contact and everything else a confident person is supposed to do.

I've been going this way for a year, but in my happiness with my newfound confidence I completely failed to notice that out of countless approaches (and hundreds of Tinder swipes) I only got two club hookups and a single date from a girl who was working at the shopping centre (which went amazingly but she changed her mind after planning for a second date and decided she didn't want to see me any more).

In the same time, my white, overweight friend has been getting numbers for fun while coming out with me all the while having an attractive girlfriend. His ability to hold conversation is poor as far as I can tell, but he does much, much better than me.

I tried to ignore it as much as I could, I've heard things like "ew he's Indian", "Indians are creepy", "I'd never go out with an Indian", but I always thought these people were in the minority.

Another issue is that while Indian girls do find me attractive, but being raised here makes me incompatible. there's always an issue with communication if they don't speak English well, the expectation to get married ASAP, parents that don't approve, etc. I'm stuck in between two dating cultures, of which I belong in neither.

As far as I can tell, there isn't anything glaringly wrong with me so much so that girls won't give me the time of the day.

A friend of mine brought up the idea that maybe if girls find me physically attractive but I'm having such bad luck that perhaps it's the stigma of being of my ethnicity rather than the look itself (it's certainly not the culture as my parents came here young and I was born here).

TL;DR:

- Got into shape, gained confidence and approached many women in many ways
- Was so used to getting rejected and it not affecting me that I didn't realise how poorly I was doing
- Noticed my white friend attracting women effortlessly despite being out of shape and not great at holding conversation
- After a conversation with a friend it occurred to me that it may be because of my background
- Makes no difference now, but I want to confirm my suspicion that he is right.

So here are my questions for the women of PEgym:

1) Do you find men of ethnicities outside your own less attractive? No. Race does not matter to me. If I think a person is cute, then I think he's cute. I don't care about a persons ethnicity.

2) With all else being equal, would you choose someone of your own ethnicity over someone of another? In America, we are all a melting pot of different cultures, so for me it has no barring.

3) Do you find Indians less attractive than other ethnicities, such as Asian? I equally find each culture has cute people. I don't discriminate at all.

4) Have you ever been attracted to a man but decided to end it because of their status/ the stigma or shame of being associated with him? (Did he have a less than desirable career, was he disliked among your peers?) I have NEVER ended a relationship based on the things you stated above. Only for being an Asshole.

5) Have you been attracted to a man but not pursued anything because of his ethnicity?
Again, no.

6) Have you chosen a less desirable man over another because they matched your ethnicity. Attitude and personality are more important to me then ethnicity.

7) Do you find that the men you are attracted to from outside your ethnicity resemble men from your ethnicity?

No. I like to look at all kinds of men.
It seems to me that you are making your ethnicity more of an issue then it needs to be. Maybe it's just where you are located. Everyone has their own opinions and some may be nicer then others.

If you have already tried going to different locations and have not had luck, maybe you need to take a different route. Have you tried a dating site that is directed more towards ladies of Indian decent? There are plenty of FREE sites. Maybe you will have more luck there.

Again, as long as you are a nice guy and looking good, you shouldn't have any issues.

[Toadstool Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Toadstool]

I don't ask my girl friends because I feel like they'd try not to hurt my feelings or anything, but when they ask theirs it's overwhelmingly against everyone that's not Caucasian.

Sometimes our friends care about us so much that they decide to shield us from stuff that may hurt our feelings. You really gotta push for it in a way that makes it sound like you're genuinely trying to improve yourself and that you want to know. Don't get all whiney and teary-eyed if they give you the worst news ever. Take it. Don't respond. Think about it. Ask yourself, how do I improve?

Another thing. I really don't believe that people know what they want. Girls and women are no different. Oh sure, they may have distinct preferences ... but only when compared to everything else they've ever experienced. You could be a totally new thing for them that blows their mind away. "Yea, he did this, this and that, and he's so great in all these ways... and he's INDIAN!" Well, you being indian really has zero to do with it. It's who you are.
You've already said that there are stereotypes about Indians. You're already doing a fantastic job of being something that is not that stereotype. Keep it up, my friend. Don't let anyone's negative bullshit get you down. Whatever they say is a combination of how they feel at that very moment in time, their past experiences with other people, their perception of who you are, their perception of who they are, a potential desire to challenge you... and a whole slew of other things. Really. Opinions, thoughts, beliefs are fluid and ever-changing. So, don't bother caring about them. Your opinion is really all that matters in this.

are you someone that you'd date? Are you someone who you respect? At the end of the day, if you believe this strong enough, so too will they.

[islander Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close islander]

So here are my questions for the women of PEgym:

1) Do you find men of ethnicities outside your own less attractive?
No. I have never dated a man within my ethnicity. I have never been attracted to a 100% anglo/white man.

2) With all else being equal, would you choose someone of your own ethnicity over someone of another?
Probably not

3) Do you find Indians less attractive than other ethnicities, such as Asians?
I find Indians more attractive than lets say Asians, however, I can honestly say I probably would not date either one of them. Why? Because I have never known one intimately. Where I grew up (which is when most of your brain connections are made) we only had white, black and hispanic. So to this day although I have met people from all over the world, it just doesn't happen/click,

4) Have you ever been attracted to a man but decided to end it because of their status/ the stigma or shame of being associated with him? (Did he have a less than desirable career, was he disliked among your peers?)
No that was not the primary reason. The primary reason was his age, location and core differences.

5) Have you been attracted to a man but not pursued anything because of his ethnicity?
yes

6) Have you chosen a less desirable man over another because they matched your ethnicity.
no

7) Do you find that the men you are attracted to from outside your ethnicity resemble men from your ethnicity?
Interesting.... YES now that I think about it. Even if they are not my ethnicity they do resemble those within my family or those "faces" I am used to seeing.

Interesting. I could not read the whole thread. I am sure by now people have attacked you for being to worried or trying to find excuses. Look its my waste of of time to post a reply to you so just wait for answers like mine who will just reply for your inner survey. I would think that any race moving/living in a primarily other race location would have your same problem. Your EYES see for your brain and your brain saves the data. It takes a while for the brain to be retrained. For those people who have not SEEN others often enough and in a good light just imagine....
I am taking the time to say this because my child has friends who have never spoke to an Indian, or Asian and only see black people working behind the counter and get on buses. Thats not their fault. That's their environment. Could their parents save money and take their kids to a melting pot and take their kids hours away to a mixed play ground? yea but really who will do that in this day and age. There is a lot more to it than girls not "liking" you because of your race. One thing makes people feel comfortable, a great sincere smile. Do it often. Change one change many. Good luck

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

Ahem most australians wouldn;t know you are indian , they mught think aboriginal or Sudanese as eaisly as Indian.

[anythingrandom Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close anythingrandom]

Talking from one Indian to another, the answer is YES. Women discriminate. Heck I discriminate on women.

However, there are many types of Indian.

There is the:
- Red dot
- Feather
- The Kumar type (Harold and Kumar)
- The foreign type

Red Dots is what appears in most women's heads when they hear INDIAN. Feathers I'm assuming are a no-no also. Kumar's are the cool Indians that are friend zoned. The foreign type is what you need, you see every woman wants to experience what she can't have. I hate to sound all erotic near that end but its the truth.

I went from Kumar to Foreign for MOST WOMEN because I worked on my appearance. All women will have a threshold on how far away from her appearance she will go intimately, some I just befriended instead! Fortunately, I didn't have an accent as I was born in Canada, but if you have an accent, l suggest googling how to lose it.

Everyone on this forum will avoid answering this question, take my answer as 100% honesty. I meet all ethnicities, and have a few caucasian ladies who I love just as friends. Get the guidance from friends because they have given me tips on to be visually attractive. From what I learnt:

- Comb overs are a hit or miss
- 6 pack is sexy for any woman
- Be well spoken
- Learn how to communicate effectively
- Learn how to project your voice
- steer away from the stereotype
- If you fall into a certain social category (Rap, Metalhead), try to diversify yourself
- Become more outgoing


One thing I'd like to stress is that you shouldn't live for the acceptance of women. If you want them for intimate purposes, they'll come and go!