Am I really that small?

[Pegasus AdministratorPE Gym EditorPEGym Hero ☺ Admin of the Month Mar 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Pegasus]

I agree. But that's because most women really don't get it that penis size matters to guys so much..... because it really doesn't matter to them very much. Hence the eternal issues of men vs women in discussing size.

Uh huh and men don't get the fat bum thing .

[Phoenix7672 Senior Member Member of the Month Oct 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Phoenix7672]

If a girl's default reply is "it is a little small" I wonder if they really know how damaging that can be for a guy vs just not building up his ego. I wonder how girls would react if our default answer was always "you're a little heavy and your breasts are kinda small". Why can't people just be honest in this world?

Granted I can only see the above working in some cases -- Tell a 8x6 he is a little small and she'll get laughed in the face...same as if you told a 90 lb girl with DDs she could be thinner and bigger upstairs. lol

[INS Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close INS]

The reason is as dishonest as the answer.

What do you mean here.

[TPW Senior Member Member of the Month Oct 2013 Find all posts View Profile Close TPW]

May I make a suggestion or three?

Since it is very difficult to completely eliminate that innate human need to draw comparisons, why not be far more selective and choose something or someone to compare yourself to that will make you feel empowered rather than diminished?

And when it comes to seeking validation, especially about something as individualistic as a penis, would it not be far more effective to take a moment and determine what the true motivation is behind such an inquiry and address those instead?

For example,

Is your inquiry triggered by an (erroneous) belief that penis size is the only true barometer of your maleness or your sexual prowess?

Is your inquiry based on a concern that your partner will leave you?

Is your inquiry an attempt to determine if your partner truly loves you?

Is your inquiry driven by a competitive need to be the biggest and the best? If so, why is that a necessity for you?

Are you concerned that you are not "normal" or conversely that you are but would prefer to somehow be more?

It has been my experience that when you uncover and address the real reason(s) for seeking validation, especially about a physical attribute, you will not only better understand your true wants and needs, you will seek more direct and satisfying ways to get them. More importantly, your level of self-confidence and self-esteem will no longer be dependent solely on what others may think. And that is very empowering indeed.

Just something to think about.

[Hanma Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Hanma]

Well, thinking about it, of course ego has a role and others have mentioned this already.

Let's repeat. It's the ego, not sincerity. I'd say that men in this context don't feel terrible about not completely satisfying their woman, but rather they feel they weren't good enough.

See, there's that thin line between love and hate.
We love being able to please the hell out of women but we hate not being good enough, especially when it comes to penis size.
Because to most men, it's something we can't change (but we at pegym know better).

So, OP, do you feel like there are a lot of expectations on you that you have to fulfil in bed? Is that why you keep asking?

[small25 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close small25]

The Passionate Wife pretty much nailed it, as all those questions apply to me one way or another.

I really do feel that I cannot satisfy a women with my penis, and I feel that women desire a larger penis than mine. Maybe my thinking is screwed up, but after reading and hearing TONS about how most women prefer a larger penis (6 inches NBPEL or above), I feel that mine is just small. Plus, the feedback I've received makes me feel worse. Plus, my girth is already below average (as some members have stated), so that is more of a bummer since we all know women prefer girth more than length. And my length doesn't really make up for my girth, as it's average. So, there you have it- I have an average length, and a below average girth, which is just under average overall I would think, or barely average. Even if I am average, I lack where it most matters- girth.

Due to all this I feel I don't have much.

[Skidd Marks Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Skidd Marks]

You're average. No more, no less. Your size is adequate to any normal female. Women cock shame as a means of manipulation. Work on your confidence, and find a woman that likes you for you. Things will get better; we're all here to support you in the meantime. Good Luck, Brother.

[Zman007 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Zman007]

The Passionate Wife pretty much nailed it, as all those questions apply to me one way or another.

I really do feel that I cannot satisfy a women with my penis, and I feel that women desire a larger penis than mine. Maybe my thinking is screwed up, but after reading and hearing TONS about how most women prefer a larger penis (6 inches NBPEL or above), I feel that mine is just small. Plus, the feedback I've received makes me feel worse. Plus, my girth is already below average (as some members have stated), so that is more of a bummer since we all know women prefer girth more than length. And my length doesn't really make up for my girth, as it's average. So, there you have it- I have an average length, and a below average girth, which is just under average overall I would think, or barely average. Even if I am average, I lack where it most matters- girth.

Due to all this I feel I don't have much.

And your attitude, anxiety, and low self esteem will be far bigger contributes to being a poor lover than the size of your penis.

There is much more to being a good lover and satisfying a partner than the size of your penis. You have more than adequate size to accomplish the job, and if you are an attentive lover, try to please hear, and learn to listen and satisfy her needs you will be far ahead of the game.

The size of your penis is only one aspect of being good in bed. I recently had a conversation with a female friend about a guy she hooked up with, she described him as having the perfect massive cock, described as a Gatorade bottle, yet he came from just grinding and never actually got it in, nor did she even touch it. The same girl described her best lover, a guy barely average that she got to mold and teach and she turned him into a machine in bed. That from a girl who is a bit of a size queen, her most disappointing moment in bed was a monster cock, and her best lover was "average" at best. The prime determinant of being good in bed was listening, learning, and fufilling your partner's needs.


You've got two choices. You can loathe your average penis, convince yourself that you won't be able to satisfy women with it and create a self fulfilling prophecy where you indeed will be a bad sad lay. Or, you can make the most of what you have, listen to their needs, put effort ingot foreplay and oral, and practice your skills and proceed with confidence and be amazing in bed.

The size of your cock is not what is limiting you, it is your lack of self confidence. If you don't change your outlook you won't satisfy women, especially when you grill them with your insecurities. Women, in general, aren't going to find that stimulating or satisfying. Quite the opposite, those insecurities are going to rob enjoyment and excitement out of the moment and poison it after the fact.


Your choice.

You also have access to PE which can help you increase to above average size, but PE isn't going to grow your small mind or fragile ego.

[turtler Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close turtler]

Maybe my thinking is screwed up, but after reading and hearing TONS about how most women prefer a larger penis (6 inches NBPEL or above

What are your sources for this information? It's not what I've read or heard at all.

[small25 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close small25]

@Zman,

Unfortunately penis size does matter a lot when it comes to me, because the other things you mentioned that satisfy women, such as especially oral sex, I do not enjoy doing. It's a personal preference thing. I simply don't enjoy performing oral sex on women, and I don't enjoy even receiving oral sex. I know, it's weird, but it's just how I am. That said, you can see that my penis does matter a lot, because I don't perform oral sex, and obviously my fingers aren't going to be near as good as my tongue will be (for the girl).

@Turtler,

I know studies show a NBPEL between 5-6 (not 6 and above), but those are studies, and as much as I'd like to believe them, one part of me tells me not to, because of what I've heard from actual females. It seems like many females say 6 inches is the average.

[Phoenix7672 Senior Member Member of the Month Oct 2015 Find all posts View Profile Close Phoenix7672]

Many females have no clue what size the average is. The women here are the exception to the rule.

Also for all intensive purposes 6 IS pretty much average (only around 0.2" off studies). You could argue BP vs NBP, but end of the day, 90% of the BP measurement or more is going inside of them...and that amount is really what they comment on (unless you have a 2" fat pad).

[small25 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close small25]

Actually I just measured my penis more accurately in terms of girth- using a more flexible tailor's tape, and my girth is actually slightly under 4.5 inches. It's around 4.4-4.45 inches in girth. So, that sucks even more, as girth matters a lot.

[Zman007 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Zman007]

Your attitude is the problem and not your penis. You really didn't listen to what I said at all.

You've made up your mind that your average penis is inadequate, and we won't convince you otherwise. You've chosen to let your penis size dictate your ability in bed and that is an injustice.

Best of luck, we can't help if in a thread asking for help you reject all of it because you've already made up your mind.

[kickinthemebs Senior Member Member of the Month Feb 2014 Find all posts View Profile Close kickinthemebs]

Meh, not really if you have half a brain... I started at 4.5" and it was never a problem.

Actually I just measured my penis more accurately in terms of girth- using a more flexible tailor's tape, and my girth is actually slightly under 4.5 inches. It's around 4.4-4.45 inches in girth. So, that sucks even more, as girth matters a lot.

[elijohnson Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close elijohnson]

I remember this friend at university, his girlfriend was afflicted with the what you might consider the female equivalent of micropenis... although I suppose as tightness is for some odd reason prized in vaginas perhaps it was the opposite... she was incredibly small in her downstairs parts is what I'm trying to say. Shallow and narrow. Sex for her was arduous and slightly painful, even though her man was, by his own admission, on the smaller side.

So when it comes to compatibility stop putting it all on your dick. Women run the spectrum too, and there are plenty out there for whom you'd be perfect.