Drinking Alone

[MrBigDick Retired ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close MrBigDick]

I have that person on block I don't see it's posts.
Thanks for all the relplies
I agree with beers and yard work. Beer while doing something. I meant sitting in a chair drinking alone at night in my original post.
The guy I referenced sucked down 6 on a first date. The guy I see now doesn't drink unless I drink. Light weight which is good lol
I'm happy I didn't grow up with drinking parents or siblings. As an adult I drink. Not often. I can suck down several mixed drinks and I party like a rock star (have it spend it lol) party doesn't have to mean getting drunk or too high to function.
But I guess I'm very picky or nervous when it comes to NEW people because you don't know how they handle themselves. That's what I'm coming away with y alls help.
Thanks as usual for your points of view. Big hug!

I can tell you that 6 beers on a first date? Talk about giving a negative impression of oneself...........I'd have ditched too in that situation. 6 is WAY too much on a first date.

I physically observed what alcohol did to my dad..........he drank vodka tonics every night......basically all vodka and a tad bit of water to dilute it. He let me have a sip once when I was like 16-17 and it was like drinking pure gasoline from your car. It was AWFUL! Couldn't understand how any human being could ingest that stuff.

Anyhoo, after that observation and then him dropping dead at age 55 from a massive coronary, I vowed NEVER to abuse alcohol in my life. I also recall vividly what it turned him into after work.......it wasn't his intent of course but after a long, stressful 12 hour day managing people and then coming home to have to help me with math homework......he was too through and didn't want to deal with it and would get angry with me very quickly if I didn't get some math concept quick......I remember how that made me feel and I decided back then I would never put my own kids through that and I'm trying very hard to live up to that promise to my kids.

On 1/1/12, I made a New Year's resolution to severely cut back my own alcohol consumption and I have stuck to my goal. I can go 3-4 days easy now without a drop. I love a glass of merlot and I love my jack and coke but these are not things I NEED to survive. I have my workouts at the gym for stress release.

Moderation is what is key here. My doctor has no problem with my current consumption level nor do I.

[MrBigDick Retired ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close MrBigDick]

Big dick so glad you posted!
That's not at all what I meant or I'm sure what SBE meant (he and I are the same in this area)
I'm talking about sitting in a chair alone and downing six beers or more or at one sitting on a regular basis
I always have one to two glasses of wine or mixed drinks on my dates when the dates are at a restaurant. No worried mr big dick. I'm with ya

Ok someone shut down my 3G so I can stop checking this thread haha

OK, maybe I misunderstood SBE's post. My apologies then. I read his post and thought "hey, wait a minute, I'll have one drink alone and I don't think that makes me an alcoholic".......but 6 beers by yourself nightly? THAT is a problem to me.

[MrBigDick Retired ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close MrBigDick]

I used to pound down the long Islands, yummy back then.

Let's see, this happened the summer of 2010 and I think I've had 1 since then.............

[ryansambas Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close ryansambas]

i don't usually drink alone but whilst ive been overseas with my friends and family in the UK which I currently am I have at some points but even then I'm with my Dad, haven't been drunk yet though but then again I can drink a lot to be honest. But once I get back home, I'll get back to just drinking on weekends

[not2big Senior Super ModeratorPEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close not2big]

Big dick so glad you posted!
That's not at all what I meant or I'm sure what SBE meant (he and I are the same in this area)
I'm talking about sitting in a chair alone and downing six beers or more or at one sitting on a regular basis
I always have one to two glasses of wine or mixed drinks on my dates when the dates are at a restaurant. No worried mr big dick. I'm with ya

I guess I misunderstood your OP and thought you would ditch anyone who drank on the first date. I only occasionally have one or two drinks alone before dinner. Since you do have one or two drinks on a date, perhaps we should try for a second date.

[islander Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close islander]

Haha
See not2big we are already having communication problems. Lmao. Too late you already ditched me. I'm hurt so deeply I could never muster the guts to try again.



Hahahaha

Yea I'll edit my OP. it's such a long thread now my clarifications are deep in the thread.

I feel confident that with all the responses I'm able to adjust my views and fear threshold. I friend of mine explained it well. We are used to what we have lived. Who we have seen. So when something is different or someone is different we sometimes shut down or off. Because I'm very private in my real life it takes a lot to get me to stay in play to get to know new people. All true stuff.
Growing every day. Gotta love life man

[spanky Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close spanky]

...I friend of mine explained it well. We are used to what we have lived. Who we have seen. So when something is different or someone is different we sometimes shut down or off. Because I'm very private in my real life it takes a lot to get me to stay in play to get to know new people. All true stuff.
Growing every day. Gotta love life man

Wise words.

Funny with all this automatic red flag talk, that I feel like MR RED FLAG over here.. and you don't know the half of it haha. Maybe it's just the British way? I dunno, it's not like I really care since I meet, attract, date, seduce and get seduced by (yeah, really) enough women not to be concerned.. and I'm not up for marriage either, but this talk has made me think a little about how choosy *I* am - since I don't have such severe standards.

I mean sure there's a point at which I know I won't get on with somebody, but I always give people the chance and the freedom to be their true selves right up until they (try to) screw me over, then it's game over for ever. I find that generally happens quickly if the person in question (not just women or dates) is going to do so.

In retrospect I guess I missed a lot of red flags with my ex, and I could maybe have avoided that hurt, but I think I learnt something different, to be more cautious with my heart, and to examine people's motives more closely. I don't think I learnt any automatic strikes from her, there are probably things she did and ways she behaved early on that shold have been automatic goodbyes, but I thought they were funny. I made the mistake of trying to keep her. If I hadn't been so accomodating with her I would have missed out on a LOT of good times too. Y'know, it only hurt at the end. Tough call?

[Hanma Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Hanma]

I mean sure there's a point at which I know I won't get on with somebody, but I always give people the chance and the freedom to be their true selves right up until they (try to) screw me over, then it's game over for ever. I find that generally happens quickly if the person in question (not just women or dates) is going to do so.

Hate to break it to you, but you'll almost always be dealing with fakes. They'll always so "I'm so and so, these are my likes and dislikes, I'm these many years old ..." but those ideas are completely man made. They do not reflect the actual self. So, even when you say "Hey, she's not attractive, but damn her true self's got a spark!" it is still a mask, albeit a great one. Our own word "person" is from the Latin, persona: "That through which comes sound." This word was used for the masks worn by actors in the Greco-Roman theater, which being an open-air theater required a projection of the voice. The word person has, however, in the course of time, come to mean "the real you." The inner self, the deep down real self is just the same as yours and everyone else's.

You think you're not caught up in these games, but you are, you are. Nothing wrong with that, you're free to join in but you know it's a game.

[spanky Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close spanky]

Hate to break it to you, but you'll almost always be dealing with fakes. They'll always so "I'm so and so, these are my likes and dislikes, I'm these many years old ..." but those ideas are completely man made. They do not reflect the actual self. So, even when you say "Hey, she's not attractive, but damn her true self's got a spark!" it is still a mask, albeit a great one. Our own word "person" is from the Latin, persona: "That through which comes sound." This word was used for the masks worn by actors in the Greco-Roman theater, which being an open-air theater required a projection of the voice. The word person has, however, in the course of time, come to mean "the real you." The inner self, the deep down real self is just the same as yours and everyone else's.

You think you're not caught up in these games, but you are, you are. Nothing wrong with that, you're free to join in but you know it's a game.

You now what, honestly I can't be bothered with it. Imma just do my thing. In the meantime, I've met amazing people, and total bitches. It's all been an experience. I could I suppose try to become some kind of expert in judging people early on, but I'm kind of too busy with other things in my life to dedicate that much energy to it. And despite that, things are going pretty well for me right now, so something must be working

[Hanma Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Hanma]

Well of course, I wasn't implying that you oght to force people to reveal themselves and only associate with smart ones. If you're having fun, go for it. But now you know what a fantastic game all of this is.

[spanky Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close spanky]

Well of course, I wasn't implying that you oght to force people to reveal themselves and only associate with smart ones. If you're having fun, go for it. But now you know what a fantastic game all of this is.

Isn't *all* of life a game though really?

[Hanma Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Hanma]

Isn't *all* of life a game though really?

Of course it is. And if one finds out that the game isn't worth the struggle, one has the right to opt out. Somehow people think that's a bad move. "Life must go on man!" ... but it doesn't have to.

[bautista19 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close bautista19]

I do, and I think the wife hates it. I should stop.

[Kelspeed Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Kelspeed]

Medicating with alcohol has never made any sense to me. I feel bad for those who do.

[MikeShlort Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close MikeShlort]

I farted