"Rome Wasn't Built in a Day"

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My flaccid was huge throughout the day today. I was experiencing that "tight" feeling that I have discussed in the past as well. I really wish I knew what that was. It's a completely odd feeling that goes from basically the head of my dick all of the way down to the base and even creeps into the balls sometimes. It's telling me something, but I have yet to get a handle on what exactly. I'm not sure if it has anything to do with the heavier than usual session this morning. I also fooled around the grip a bit. I basically made my grip lighter. I know one thing is for certain: when I keep my grip light with "light" meaning "slightly more force than a masturbation," I get the best flaccid plump. It's amazing how little pressure needs to be applied for the jelq to work. I mean, it's obviously working if I have a blood-filled flaccid penis for hours upon hours following my routine. Now if I could just correlate the "tight" feeling with all of this, we would be getting somewhere. But, as it turns out, PE is one big clusterfuck of chaotic madness that we never truly understand. I do my best though. Okay, Gator is signing out for now. I'm packed and going to be leaving Gator country for a few months. I'll be signing back on from my hometown in a few days. Probably Sunday with hopefully a report of some good gains after I measure. Later!

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Well, I'm back home. I actually miss home and I'm glad I'll be here for a few months. Disney is just 5 miles away, so I think I might get my old job back there. It's so much fun and a bunch of my friends from high school usually do as well. All in all, it's good to be home after a pretty good first year at college.

I did the edging thing tonight to reach a full and max erection - standard operating procedure when measuring. I masturbated lightly for 60 minutes before taking the measurement. Edging is so much fun. I think I reached near-climax about 8 times in those 60 minutes. Then I measured both girth and length. The results were poor, if not downright disturbing.

With an EQ of 10 and a 100% erection, I actually only could measure my STARTING PE LENGTH. I quadruple checked the measurement and still could only get my starting length from January. My girth decreased as well, but still reflected some gains that I have made, but not much. So, that's extremely irritating and train-derailing upsetting that I basically have lost all of my gains. I know they weren't poor measurements because I always measure the same way, same ruler, same tape, same exact spots.

I'm not sure where to go from here actually. I had a plan but this throws shit way out of focus. I've been very good about staying positive lately but measuring losses while still in a virtual "newbie" period (where I am supposed to measure consistent gains) is a real kick in the ass. I'm very negative about PE at the moment. This stuff seems to only give me temporary gains and then they go away.

But, I'm not going to let it control my life. I might have to realize the simple fact that not everyone can gain from PE and I am one of them. It's time to go hang out with some old pals that I haven't seen in awhile. I was supposed to restart PE tomorrow, but I doubt I'm going to. The motivation is in the shitty chasms of the toilet at the moment.

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I've noticed that you've lost gains again after adding volume to your routine AND experiencing that "tight" feeling again. I may be misremembering this, but wasn't that exactly what happened the last time you lost gains? It was adding a lot of volume to your stretching back then, but the same thing applies here - I think you've overworked and have lost size because of that.

Should you take a rest and see if the gains return?

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The tight feeling actually yielded some "gains" last time. And I didn't increase volume that much. Literally 20-30 reps of jelqing. That's not a lot. And I didn't get any negative P.I.s from it. My P.I.s have always indicated that I should be growing like a damn weed. Instead I seem to grow like a small weed but then the lawnmower that is reality chops it off back to original size.

Thanks for all of your help Keido.

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I'M BACK...

My PE Vices:

• I’ve never given a routine long enough to know if it was really working or not.
• I intensify at a rate that would hardly be considered “gradual.”
• I often mistake myself for being advanced in the PE world.
• I place too little emphasis on quality.
• I habitually get frustrated and irritated for no apparent dire reason.
• I don’t properly listen to my penis when it speaks to me.
• I measure entirely too often and I routinely expect gains every time.
• I expect to gain at the same rate as or better than other people.
• I frequently cross the line between focusing and obsessing.
• I take my improved EQ, larger flaccid and increased stamina for granted.
• I surrender too easily.

I've been back with PE for about 2 weeks now. I routinely do 2 sessions per day. In the morning, I do fairly flaccid wet jelqs in the shower (erection level of no more than 30%). In the evening, I do more forceful wet jelqs at higher erection levels (between 60% and 80%). Repetitions fluctuate between 50 and 150 depending on how everything feels. I usually follow a relatively intense day up with a light day. I throw some days off in there for recovery, but I'm not scheduled with those. I take them when I feel like I need them. Well, that's it for now. It's good to be back.

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8/4/09: 100 jelqs today. Great P.I.s as well. One thing I have switched since my PE restart is my jelqing angle. I now jelq downwards. It's more comfortable and I feel like I get a great stretch out of the jelqing stroke as well. My post-jelqing flaccid is not only full and plump, but it's also stretched out. Good times.