I need help guys (ED getting worse)

[UKGuy Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close UKGuy]

How can you tell when ED is mental too?

So I went to see my doctor this week and I was clear about wanting to see a urolgist for physical tests but my doctor insisted there was no point because the last tests I had done for blood, testosterone etc was all normal. I wasn't too happy when he said I couldn't see the uroligist he said there was no point this ED all in my head apparently. He did ask me if something may of triggered this feeling of having ED but I wasn't bold enough to say I tried to enlarge my penis when I was 21 years old by doing jelqing and stretches and I mean how weird would that sound? I don't understand how having normal blood work resutls is enough to say a guy has no ED but here in the UK if you don't get refered to a uroligist you don't see one period the only other way is to go private. I have even told me dad about my erection problems but he too is convinced it's all in my head and I don't have the guts to tell him I stupidly tried to enlarge my dick years ago which has resulted in erection problems ever since. It's too embarrassing I'll be honest about most things but somethings you can't say.

I do wonder though if part of my ED is mental why? because in general my erection is weak, I can barely hold it and random hard ons are very rare, and again they'e weak. The samething with morning erections they're pretty infrequent and gone as soon as I get up in seconds. It feels like some days I can't even get an erection even with porn. However there are times I get good erections including in the morning and at night this is really messing with me I don't have consistencies with erections at all I don't think it helps that I have worries that my penis will turn into Fibrosis tissue and I'll end up totally impotent. Now I know the soft and deflated glans is absolutely a phsyiscal defect because the glans are soft also if I wake up with an erection or at night. However not being able to get good strong erections or none at all could this be mental? I remember I read a post here of a guy who suffered months of ED due to one bad experience of not being able to get hard and he had erection problems for months he didn't even get morning wood anymore. Can the mind really mess with your dick that much?

I really don't know what's wrong with me is it worth talking to a shrink about this? I need to do something though because these erections problems are preventing me from trying to have sex. Being a virgin with ED isnt' too sexy.

Does anyone have any advice? Also if you honestly think the problem maybe mental can I overcome this mental block?

Thanks

[GanzoGono Member Find all posts View Profile Close GanzoGono]

Yes your problem is mental. Its written all over your post. The thing about your attempt at jelqing a number of years ago is just a "crutch" and an excuse you are using right now. Fact is you have stated there are times you have strong erections and you can masturbate. Thats all you need to know your ED is mental. You ask whether the brain is that powerful? Its by far the single most powerful organ of your body system. It controls everything. Did you know that there are people who fall sick and even die just because they "believe" they are sick? Right now you are believing that your "penis will turn into Fibrosis tissue and I'll end up totally impotent". That all you need to have erection problems. You are too "self aware" about your erection. Yet you are a virgin! Wow. Anyway you ask if you can overcome this mental block. Offcourse! I see men overcome it everyday. You have made the first and most important step, which is accepting that you have a mental problem. That was the biggest obstacle. Many men fail on this level as they go around in circles looking for excuses and fail to see their problem is in their head. You have by passed that obstacle. The rest will be easy. Too bad I cant post links on here but go ahead and now do some research on this issue. You will be fine.

[DemOne Banned Find all posts View Profile Close DemOne]

You can tell when it's mental when you go to the doctor and there's no physical reason you have ED.

[UKGuy Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close UKGuy]

Yes your problem is mental. Its written all over your post. The thing about your attempt at jelqing a number of years ago is just a "crutch" and an excuse you are using right now. Fact is you have stated there are times you have strong erections and you can masturbate. Thats all you need to know your ED is mental. You ask whether the brain is that powerful? Its by far the single most powerful organ of your body system. It controls everything. Did you know that there are people who fall sick and even die just because they "believe" they are sick? Right now you are believing that your "penis will turn into Fibrosis tissue and I'll end up totally impotent". That all you need to have erection problems. You are too "self aware" about your erection. Yet you are a virgin! Wow. Anyway you ask if you can overcome this mental block. Offcourse! I see men overcome it everyday. You have made the first and most important step, which is accepting that you have a mental problem. That was the biggest obstacle. Many men fail on this level as they go around in circles looking for excuses and fail to see their problem is in their head. You have by passed that obstacle. The rest will be easy. Too bad I cant post links on here but go ahead and now do some research on this issue. You will be fine.

I don't think it's all mental though I'm convinced I destroyed my penis when I overstetched it, when stretching it shrunk up really small (like when you come out of a swimming pool) and it was hard to touch like not enough blood flow was circulating. It did go back to normal a while after but I woke up and again my my penis was shrunk and hard again like the blood flow was restricted I panicked and told my dad fortunately my penis hasn't been like that since but I'm really worried I permamantly fucked up my penis for life. I was so stupid but I never felt any pain when this happened or discomfort I can't tell you how much I regret trying to enlarge my penis sigh I was young and niave. I'm seriously worried about having fibrosis in my penis of the result of this happening years ago and that I may develop Corporal fibrosis.

I'm sorry If bore some here but I have a hard time mentally coping with having ED and I'm sure I'll end up completely impotent and never be able to experience sex. My overall confidence is good I think and general outlook on life but I have zero confidence in my ability to have sex any form of ED can and will crush a man. I get a lot more interest from women too but it kills me I am impotent.

PS: I do get pretty good erections somedays (but usually still need constant mantual stimulation) but I'm sure it's just because I've been doing Kegels. This is really messing with me too because on the same day i'll get a solid erection (with a deflated head) but still a near normal erection then later that day I can barely get it up and the erection is weak again.


Advice would be appreciated. Is it worth talking to someone about this?

Thanks

[Sexuallyblessed Member Find all posts View Profile Close Sexuallyblessed]

UKGUY even if you hurt your penis, it works more then well enough to have a great relationship with a woman. Most peoples problems are way worse then ours. Stop forcing yourself to be a virgin because of this injury. I am in the same boat as you, and I am not even entirely sure if my ED was caused by injury or not. Our problem may be mostly mental, it may be physical, it may be hormonal or due to neurotransmitters, it is unclear since we both have MILD ED. Yes, our MILD ED can becomes significant due to anxiety or on rare occasions, but for the most part we both have MILD ED or NO ED. So my advice is to go on a sex rampage (use protection or find a clean girl who you cares about you that you can reveal your sexual issues to). You can consider using a prostitute as well but make sure she is sweet, safe, and make it a last option. You dont even need to have sex, just start by getting handjobs and blowjobs from girls until u feel more comfortable with sex. You have a life to live, a great one.

[Samurai Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Samurai]

I don't think it's all mental though I'm convinced I destroyed my penis when I overstetched it, when stretching it shrunk up really small (like when you come out of a swimming pool) and it was hard to touch like not enough blood flow was circulating. It did go back to normal a while after but I woke up and again my my penis was shrunk and hard again like the blood flow was restricted. I panicked and told my dad fortunately my penis hasn't been like that since but I'm really worried I permamantly fucked up my penis for life. I was so stupid but I never felt any pain when this happened or discomfort I can't tell you how much I regret trying to enlarge my penis sigh I was young and niave. I'm seriously worried about having fibrosis in my penis of the result of this happening years ago and that I may develop Corporal fibrosis.

I'm sorry If bore some here but I have a hard time mentally coping with having ED and I'm sure I'll end up completely impotent and never be able to experience sex. My overall confidence is good I think and general outlook on life but I have zero confidence in my ability to have sex any form of ED can and will crush a man. I get a lot more interest from women too but it kills me I am impotent.

PS: I do get pretty good erections somedays (but usually still need constant mantual stimulation) but I'm sure it's just because I've been doing Kegels. This is really messing with me too because on the same day i'll get a solid erection (with a deflated head) but still a near normal erection then later that day I can barely get it up and the erection is weak again.


Advice would be appreciated. Is it worth talking to someone about this?

Thanks

I'm convinced I destroyed my penis! I panicked! I'm really worried I permamantly fucked up my penis for life! I regret! sigh! I'm seriously worried about having fibrosis in my penis! I may develop Corporal fibrosis! I have a hard time mentally coping! I'm sure I'll end up completely impotent! I have zero confidence in my ability to have sex! it kills me I am impotent!

UkGuy, I just copied and pasted some of the emotional and stressful things you wrote in your post. A strong erection happens naturally without thought whereas stress and anxiety ruin erections. If these are the thoughts going through your head while you are supposed to be turned on then no wonder you are finding it hard to get erect. GanzoGono seems to know what he's talking about. If I was you, I would listen to him. Why don't you want to believe it's mental? I think it's mental and if it is, it will be far easier to cure.

[CUSP82 Administrator Admin of the Month Dec 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close CUSP82]

Erectile dysfunction means your dick doesn't work. Your dick works. You get some morning wood and you really have a nice one watching porn don't you? You don't listen to your doctor. You don't want to listen to your dad. Good thing I'm not your dad. I'd kick you right in the nuts to make sure it doesn't work. Go ahead and blame jelqing, the world, the doctor and anything or anybody else you'd like to. Why not blame global warming. It really couldn't be your head could it? So go enjoy a life that you're trying at a young age to screw up. Man if I was your age again I'd be screwing everything that moves. I guess you're just trying to be nice and leaving the girls to the other guys. GROW UP!

[UKGuy Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close UKGuy]

Guys I'm glad you made me see sense I'm thinking my ED is largely mental afterall and I can't tell you how happy I am about that. You see for years I have struggled with getting good erections and I wonder if those few bad experiences with PE years ago subconciously has prevented me from maintaining an erection. On a average day I would wake up limp and even with porn my erection would be weak and tough to maintain. To be honest I have scared out of my mind I may have irreversible Venous Leakage or penile fibrosis.

Well I can't believe it but the other night I woke up early with no erection but I started thinking about sex and got a solid erection usually I would lose this in ten seconds but I went downstairs and my shaft was still hard I must of jerked off for a good hour or so to one of those late night phone sex shows lol Since then I have been getting good erections that last a good while I don't need to constantly touch it to remain hard. Now the glans still won't fully inflate and they deflate quickly while the shaft remains hard but I can live with that. It's funny but I since I've been thinking about getting monring wood I have now and I notice getting an erection when asleep. I have been doing Kegels recently though so I'm not sure if they have anything to do with it but I haven't done them for days. Still thought who cares my erections are back.

Can the mind really mess you up like this? For months and years now I have struggled with erection problems and until recently the last good (near normal) erection I had was when I used a fleshlight years ago. I've also realized that you need the sexual thoughts to keep the erection staying if that makes sense. What mean is you need the mental arousal to maintain the erection.

Thank you guys for making me see sense my dick does work and that's all I care about now I just need to try and boost my confidence up and get laid. I guess anytime I struggle with erections will probably be mental I think if the mental arousal isn't there it's hard to stay aroused and hard.

[Samurai Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Samurai]

Great news, man! I'm very happy for you. I too sometimes have mental issues with erections and I think they become worse with dry spells(lack of sex) but once you start having sex regularly with a woman, you'll get hard as a rock because you'll be relaxed.
I agree about the sexual thoughts. You must be in the moment.
Good luck

[hunghigh Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close hunghigh]

UKGUY....I am happy for you dude! I am also glad to read something like this. I have a very similar issue going on. 3 days ago I has a hard erection but last night I started trippin cause manually I couldn't get it hard. I mean I was tugging on it to get the blood flowing. Didnt happen and I was freaing out. It was like I just got out of a cold pool. There was no blood flow period. I did this for almost an hour. It was my day off from PE and when I edged earlier got really hard. I really think its all mental. I have been doing PE off and on since 07. And about a month and a half ago started up again. Started seeing some gains then...... couldn't get it hard. My gf is frustrated with this and thinks its her. Not!!!!!!! She is hot! Last week I started thinking how my business is not as busy as It used to be. Well, just so happened the whole day I am thinking about this my girl wants to have sex. I couldn't set aside my worry's and anxiety to give my undivided attention to her. That's where it all started and still today is the same way. When she sucked on it 4 days ago it got hard. When I got ready to insert limp as a noodle. The whole time I am thinking is it going to stay hard (that has ruined sex for me lately). My mind has taken over my sexual emotion and now I have a mental block. Now I wonder if ill ever stop thinking about this. I am going to take some time off (sex) and try and be more spontaneous and not lose an awesome woman. We have talked about it today as a matter of fact. She says she loves me more than just sex. Plus she says I am the only guy that's ever made her come. (with my tongue and rubbing her G-Spot). So for what ever reason It makes me feel at ease to see this post. Thank you for posting. And I hope for both out sakes we can start getting an boner for no reason! I would how ever like to keep in touch with you to see your progress!

[CUSP82 Administrator Admin of the Month Dec 2014PEGym Hero Find all posts View Profile Close CUSP82]

So this turned out to be a good story? I like good stories!

[UKGuy Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close UKGuy]

Well guys I think I'm calling it a day I have been here now for a long time and my main reason for being here is to inform myself about ED I have no desire to enlarge my penis not anymore. Sure I wouldn't mind more size but it's not the end of the world being average no amount of extra is worth it when you risk your erection. PE just isn't for me. Anyway I feel I have read everything I can on ED and to honest I am not really thinking about it anymore as long as I can get it up and have sex that's all I care about nothing else matters. I have come to realize that part of my erection problems are largely mental but probably physical as well (because of the glans of my penis doesn't inflate properly or stay firm) if I experience erections problems when I try and have actual sex (and not jerking off) then I will just try and deal with it by seeing a doctor or uroligst but I'll come to that bridge if I come to it. Reading about ED for years now it has taken enough of my time as it is and I have things I want to work on in my life. I'm looknig forward to next year as I am planning a lot of things and changes in my life.

I want to leave on a positive note thanks again for everyones support and putting up with my negetivety at times.

Cheers

[dsfan Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close dsfan]

Dude... It is not necessarily physical because your head isnt inflating entirely...

Sorry to see you leave, but you will consciously or sub consciously be always wondering whats going on down there....

Just see a Dr... I wish someone made me see one years ago.

[Zman007 Senior Member Find all posts View Profile Close Zman007]

If you can achieve an erection, whether its morning wood, watching porn, etc you DO NOT have physical ED. Plain and simple.

As to the soft glans I'd like to share a bit of info about my personal experience with it. When I started PE my glans was soft, much softer than the rest of the shaft. Needless to say I researched it and thought I had a minor venous leakage, likely caused by my failed attempt at jelqing years ago when I was 17. Sound familiar? There is a happy ending, thanks to PE, breaking a mild porn addiction, and chronic over masturbation my EQ has improved significantly and my glans is much, much more inflated than previously. Before, my shaft was hard, quite hard, yet my glans was soft and almost shriveled looking; even with my morning wood. In me, my lower EQ first manifests as a soft glans and improved EQ has effectively reversed this problem completely, I attribute it healthier soft muscle tissue.

Take a step back, acknowledge that your ED is psychological in nature. Once you accept that fact to can take steps to correct it. Light PE almost universally improves EQ and could help you as well as long as you are careful. Also, porn and excess masturbation could be a huge part of your ED.

I wish you the best of luck, but please know that we are our own worst enemies.

[oslo Junior Member Find all posts View Profile Close oslo]

UK guy and Hunghigh, you guys give me hope. I'm dealing with the same issue right now. I'm trying to stay positive everyday, but each time I'm by myself or with my girl I start over thinking. For example, just yesterday I was with my girl and we were kissing and just hugging. I got an erection, but I started to think "yes I got an erection this is good I'm cured" suddenly it starts going limp again. In stead of enjoying the moment, my mind starts to wonder and I guess I block my mental arousal that way. This is messing with my mind to dam much. I know now that it is all mental. So now I'm going to try my best to beat this. Oh yeah, UK guy I'm also a virgin (25) and that sucks super balls, having this mental issues with ED. Good Luck with all you guys, stay positive.