Originally posted by Qandisa
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Same...it just seems odd to me. I've actually heard from more than a few people that the 'new dating style' is to email full nudes to each other before ever even meeting up for coffee, simply to cut time and judge everyone as if it was a meat market. I really hope that is just the select few, and not actually the new norm.Originally posted by Sequoia Tree View PostGoing off on a bit of a tangent here, but I totally agree. I don't understand how this embarrassing boorish behavior became so prevalent. I'm pretty darn sure that women in general don't like looking at dicks as much as we like looking at boobs and behinds. And certainly not when they're unsolicited.
I have never sent a dick pic, unsolicited or otherwise, to anyone. Heck, even if my girlfriend were feeling a bit horny and asked for one, I'd probably just send her a pic of me sporting a bulge in some well-fitting pants with abs visible, because I love building anticipation to the point where she just wants to tear your clothes off, spring into your arms, wrap her legs around you, and shove her tongue down your throat
. Or I'd do something silly, like be naked, with a guitar hanging in front of my crotch, and caption the photo, "25 rock (maple) hard inches of fully-functional wood".
I'm not sure anyone here knows enough about guitar building to get the maple joke.
As for sending pics, it just seems odd to me. I've only had one girl sort of ask when we were on the topic of size and I said I was 'around 7 inches' and she wanted me to prove it. I told her I'd only do that in person. Granted, if I was ever with a girl a few times, and she wanted a picture afterwards, I'd be more willing to comply.Original/Current Stats:
2014-09-01: BPEL 6.8"/NBPEL 6" MEG 5.0", BPFL 5"/NBPFL 4" FG 4.4"
2019-03-16: BPEL 8"/NBPEL 6.75" MEG 5.2", BPFL 6.75"/NBPFL 5.5" FG 4.5"
Goals:
Realistic: BPEL 8.5"/NBPEL 7.5" MEG 5.5"
Optimistic: BPEL 9"/NBPEL 8" MEG 5.75"
Dream: BPEL 10"/NBPEL 9" MEG 6.5"
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I'm of two minds on the whole dick pics phenomenon. On the one hand - unsolicited dick pics are rarely a good thing. I say "rarely" instead of "never" because lets face it there are instances where it's oddly appropriate. If you're using a hookup site and it's clear that the only reason you're there is for sex then you might as well use it as a meat market since really that's what it is. Aside from that unless you're already in a very intimate relationship and you already have a history of sending that kind of thing, unsolicited dick pics are really never a good thing.
MainFWB has been around for over a year and a half and he's never sent a dick pic - the closest it's come is him in his underwear. We keep talking about taking some blowjob pics but that hasn't happened yet. NewFWB hasn't sent a just a dick pic but he has sent full body nudes. Some of my other FWBs have sometimes sent dick pics with notes like "I miss you" or "wish you were here".
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Personally I'd send flowers, or maybe my ear if I was in an artistic mood!The world's still a toy if you just stay a boy!
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Dang, I have recently watched a ted talk where the dickpic thing was touched upon..
Edit: Holy moly, so many sex ted-talks; it was hard to find, but I did, here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jKAehegqTvg
Interesting bits 08:30+
The gist of it - more or less - is:
- No proper parenting
- No parents available at critical age (jobs)
- Internet everywhere (smartphones)
- Teenagers and even pre-teen (8 year+) pick up all their knowledge from porn
- Think its norm
- Dickpics become a normal thing, blowjobs at parties with ppl you just met at the age of 13 become a normal thing.. they grow up with values like these.
Imo this has started much earlier and I think ppl at the age group of up to 30 are even affected by this.
PS: Regarding posts:
#125, #128, #131
Why do you guys make it seem like we are bothering Qandisa (or females in general).
This is a PE forum, people here are all about dick enlargement SO ofc we are all interested and we would like to know what the opposite gender thinks about it. Any questions or "pestering" of the opposite sex is not there to annoy them but to answer questions some or many of us truly want answers to.
Id like to think that Qandisa is not bothered by it. And if you are, well sry =/Last edited by ehlolol; 09-30-2015, 11:23 AM.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ BPEL/NBPEL⠀x MSEG/BEG
Started 6.50/5.50⠀⠀x 5.50/5.00
Current 8.11/7.25⠀⠀x 5.50/5.00
Targets 9.00/8.00⠀⠀x 6.00/6.25 (or longer!)
journal
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Regarding the younger guy thing, I'm 35... and I think if I was up for something non-serious I might be more open to a younger guy, but if I wanted something serious I would look for someone around my age or maybe a little older. And the only reason for that is mostly my own personal stuff, in that if I do get involved again I'd want someone who is more established in life and hopefully didn't want more children because I don't want any more.
Also agree on unsolicited dick pic comments. I think that kind of thing is the only thing that would prompt me to be deliberately insulting about someone's size.
And I don't know if it's so much the "pestering" that's annoying but the whole debating of penis size and how many hands and putting good/bad lovers vs. penis size into an actual freaking EQUATION that is just, well, way overblown.
What I'm hearing from Quandisa is this: "Having a big dick doesn't mean you are a better lover and will please your woman more." I don't think I could agree more.
I don't understand why that is so hard to understand. Y'all focus on dick size so much - and yes, this is a PE site, I get that - but so many of you seem to think that it is the most important thing, like having a huge cock is this panacea of manliness and awesome lover-ness. As if the only thing that causes women to not fall all over themselves for you is the fact that you are "merely average."
And please believe us when we say that it is not an issue. It really isn't. Perhaps some women, yes, but most of us are not size queens. Most of us would just love to have a lover who is attentive, listens, pays attention, and is teachable. None of that is dependent on penis size.
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And if Q is ever bothered by it then it will bother me... greatly!The world's still a toy if you just stay a boy!
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You are absolutely encouraged to ask for input re: penis size. You're right - this is an enlargement forum, so not a big surprise members are concerned about size. :-DOriginally posted by ehlolol View PostDang, I have recently watched a ted talk where the dickpic thing was touched upon..
Edit: Holy moly, so many sex ted-talks; it was hard to find, but I did, here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jKAehegqTvg
Interesting bits 08:30+
The gist of it - more or less - is:
- No proper parenting
- No parents available at critical age (jobs)
- Internet everywhere (smartphones)
- Teenagers and even pre-teen (8 year+) pick up all their knowledge from porn
- Think its norm
- Dickpics become a normal thing, blowjobs at parties with ppl you just met at the age of 13 become a normal thing.. they grow up with values like these.
Imo this has started much earlier and I think ppl at the age group of up to 30 are even affected by this.
PS: Regarding posts:
#125, #128, #131
Why do you guys make it seem like we are bothering Qandisa (or females in general).
This is a PE forum, people here are all about dick enlargement SO ofc we are all interested and we would like to know what the opposite gender thinks about it. Any questions or "pestering" of the opposite sex is not there to annoy them but to answer questions some or many of us truly want answers to.
Id like to think that Qandisa is not bothered by it. And if you are, well sry =/
I do agree with Scarlet that for most women, penis size isn't a deal maker or breaker, when it comes to a relationship. I've said it numerous times - I've been with men who were well-endowed that were crummy lovers and I've been with men who were average and were phenomenal. Does a larger penis make certain positions easier - yes. However, I've never fallen in love or out of love with a man because of his penis size.
Guys - if there is a woman in your life (or man) who has either left you, made you feel inadequate or has threatened to leave you because of penis size -- you don't need them in your life.
Period.
No good relationship is built on superficial, physical attributes. If they are that shallow, you don't need them.
Penis enlargement (and any aspect of male enhancement) should be done for YOU and you alone. Just like a woman shouldn't get a breast enhancement or lose weight for a man; men shouldn't turn to PE for a partner. Do it because you want to better yourself.
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I'm not bothered by the questions, I do get bothered by the arguing and the refusal to accept the answers that are given. I'm not saying hey I gave an answer and my word is law, I'm saying if you get an answer then when you try and say "well yes but" in an effort to do nothing more than justify your own contrary thoughts and opinions then that bothers me. There are only so many ways I can try and say the same thing and then I just get frustrated and give up.Originally posted by ehlolol View Post
Why do you guys make it seem like we are bothering Qandisa (or females in general).
This is a PE forum, people here are all about dick enlargement SO ofc we are all interested and we would like to know what the opposite gender thinks about it. Any questions or "pestering" of the opposite sex is not there to annoy them but to answer questions some or many of us truly want answers to.
Id like to think that Qandisa is not bothered by it. And if you are, well sry =/
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Originally posted by Qandisa View PostI'm not bothered by the questions, I do get bothered by the arguing and the refusal to accept the answers that are given. I'm not saying hey I gave an answer and my word is law, I'm saying if you get an answer then when you try and say "well yes but" in an effort to do nothing more than justify your own contrary thoughts and opinions then that bothers me. There are only so many ways I can try and say the same thing and then I just get frustrated and give up.
Digging up an old thread here but Qandisa I got up to page 4 and didn't see the answer to this, apologies if it was already mentioned.
Your main FWB and new FWB that are so great...correct me if I'm wrong but I think I'm about their size (6.75 NBPEL and 5.125 girth)...at least without these sudden new ED issues the last few weeks
Anyway, what is it about them that makes the sex so great? I've gathered that you
1. Like going hard/rough and their size allows this without pain
2. Don't like much deep fingering because of the boniness of fingers
3. Like the connection with them....can you explain that a little more? Just emotionally or what?
so I'm wondering what else is it that makes it so great for you, technique wise or otherwise
Thanks in advance!
Edit: What's your ideal length of time for foreplay and then for the actual sex? Is going down a big thing for you? I feel like I'm reasonably good at going down but I've been with a lot of women (43-44 at age 24) and worry about STDs with going down on them so I rarely do.
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Hey Pumped, sorry to be a few days with a reply - things have been busy
I do like it hard/rough, it's not the boney-ness of the fingers that's the issue, I'm not really sure how to adequately describe it. There's just something about it that's a turn-off for me. A little bit of it is okay, maybe as a quick tease of things to come, but more than that is just annoying.Originally posted by Pumped340 View PostAnyway, what is it about them that makes the sex so great? I've gathered that you
1. Like going hard/rough and their size allows this without pain
2. Don't like much deep fingering because of the boniness of fingers
3. Like the connection with them....can you explain that a little more? Just emotionally or what?
so I'm wondering what else is it that makes it so great for you, technique wise or otherwise
As for the connection, it's just a interpersonal chemistry thing really. For example I kind of/possibly picked up a guy last night. We were both at the same place, working but not for the same people but because of what we were doing I was able to spend pretty much 5 straight hours just talking and flirting with him. We had a great chemistry and rapport going, very much at ease with each other, very playful. I've never seen him naked, I have no idea what he's "packing", but I can tell you that sex with him would likely be better than with most any guy that's just saying hey you look hot we should fuck. He kept saying how great even just talking to me was. That's the kind of thing that I mean - someone that you enjoy just being with, that you want to be around, that you have a genuine desire to please and actually care about. Not like wow really deep feelings for each other, but let's face it if you really don't care all that much if you ever see the person again then you're not going to really be caring 100% about making sure THEY are having a fantastic time, are you?
MainFWB and I have a lot of respect for each other, even though we don't really talk about things like that. But we know what each other likes and exactly how to turn the other person on. We can look at each other from across a crowded room, make eye contact and just with one look know that okay things are going to be hot and steamy later.
NewFWB and I are still getting to know the finer details of each other, but we have a really good rapport. We felt totally comfortable with each other right from the very first meeting. We're open and honest about what we'd like. Our particular likes and kinks mesh together very well.
With both of these guys there's an emphasis on making sure the entire experience as a whole is enjoyable. It's not just about the fucking, it's about everything leading up to the fucking and after as well (the latter moreso with NewFWB than with MainFWB). It's about knowing what your partner likes and trying to make everything about it something that they'll never forget, each and every time. You can't do that with someone who you don't have a kind of connection with. If it's just someone that you want to fuck because they have a nice body then really you're not going to really care about putting the effort into finding out what they like and what they want. Those things take time, and energy.
Foreplay... that's a good question. And foreplay is different with each partner. Personally I love receiving oral, neither MainFWB or NewFWB is into it so if there was anything at all about our encounters that I would change if I could then that would be the only thing. As for length of foreplay, it really depends - which may not seem like a satisfactory answer.Originally posted by Pumped340 View PostEdit: What's your ideal length of time for foreplay and then for the actual sex? Is going down a big thing for you? I feel like I'm reasonably good at going down but I've been with a lot of women (43-44 at age 24) and worry about STDs with going down on them so I rarely do.
- With MainFWB "foreplay" usually starts as texting for a while before he comes over - that might be starting from an hour before or a day before. It not only helps to confirm plans but to build anticipation as well. MainFWB is a very big, very physical man so with him "foreplay" usually consists of him grabbing me, kissing me a little bit, sometimes biting me, manhandling me, playing with/biting/sucking my breasts, and then giving him a blowjob until he's at the point where he's just not willing to wait anymore. Sometimes the "foreplay" component is less than 5 minutes.
- With NewFBW foreplay is typically less intense but longer and more involved. Lots of kissing, stroking, petting. Sometimes involving massages and oils. And of course the other things that are involved with foreplay with MainFWB, just not as intense. It's as it gets closer to the actual fucking that the intensity and roughness picks up, and then we might start to get into the hair pulling or slapping or spanking etc. When it gets to the actual sex then it's that plus scratching, choking, sometimes a whip... if I decide to really make him work for it then he'll have to add in various ways to try and keep me restrained or make me submit etc. But the foreplay part of it could be 15minutes, or it could be an hour - it just depends on what the mood that day is.Last edited by Qandisa; 11-04-2015, 09:55 PM.
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Good answers
I was expecting something about the rhythm between you two and what he does specifically but I guess that naturally needs to be there.
The foreplay thing is interesting, as I have read/seen a lot on oral and think I know what I'm doing, but then again it seems like girls often just want to get to it. I tease and whatnot but whenever I finger my girlfriend, after a minute or two she's "begging for my cock" which seems great but makes me wonder if she's not enjoying the fingering. I've had a number of girls pull me to them to fuck them and stop the foreplay as well. I am a big guy, 6'1" 200lb and muscular, so I try to really emphasize the dominance aspect. I've had a number of girls just be interested in me because of my body, so that makes me wonder how much they would really care either
haha.
I almost never go down on girls because of my concern for STDs but the other night I did and after 3-5 minutes she (new girl, not my gf...open relationship) pulled me up and said "come on..." to have sex with her. I don't do anything crazy, I just try to follow this as much as possible: the best and easiest way to eat pussy .......she will cum as many times as you want basically sucking/licking the clit area at the same time and occasionally using 1 finger just an inch or two in to stimulate around the g-spot area. The few girls I have done this on seem to like it but there are no crazy reactions. The way that post describes it it seems like there should be a much bigger reaction.
I think the connection thing makes sense though I still fairly often hear about girls having "amazing sex" with some random guy, which makes me think the physicality of it is still huge. Not to mention the many women who love their boyfriends/husbands/etc and are comfortable with them, yet are woefully unsatisfied sexually.
Do you get a lot into dirty talk? That certainly seems like something most girls like but have to feel particularly comfortable with the guy to do.
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Im not a woman, but I personally believe the flirting, anticipation, and foreplay are just as or more important than the sex itself. One thing my girl always tells me is she loves the way I look at her. Like I want to devour her and it makes her feel very attractive, which she is.
Then there is the kiss. There is kissing, then there is that kiss that flips the switch. Like a spark and you know where its going to lead. You become primal. The anticipation and excitement is what I love. I can feel my girls heart skip a beat, her breathing becomes erratic, and she starts to tremble as she makes the sexiest animalistic sounds. Thats when I know the sex is going to be mind blowing. I get that excited anxiety, almost like my first sexual experience. I start to think, this is gonna happen. I have not really experienced this type of sexual chemistry before and Ive had some good sex. I Light some candles, put on some music before I slowly undress her. Kissing her neck from behind as my hands make my way to her breasts before I pull her shirt off. Admiring her gorgeous body by candlelight is like a dream. Hearing her breathing get deeper as I kiss and touch her neck and shoulders. Her hips automatically start pushing towards my body. She wants to be touched between her legs. I run my hand between her legs and pull away for a little tease. She starts getting more aggressive and makes it known she wants me. Thats when her pants come off, and those sexy panties, omg. I can't help but stare. She knows I want her and I know she wants me. I quickly undress and stand behind her with my hard dick between her legs, slowly rubbing my dick between her legs. She can't take it anymore and grabs my dick and tries to stuff it in around her panties. I pull away, slowly remove her panties, and we press together. She feels my hard dick between her legs. Thumping. I lay her down and get on top sliding my dick over her clit as she moans like an animal. My dick moves closer to her wet vagina and I slide in just the tip. She begs for more. Grabbing at my dick to push it in. But Im in control, she gets what I give her. After a few minutes of a tease with my tip, I ask if she wants more. I make her beg for more. Then bam, I give her all of it. She gasps for breath after being filled up. After another 20 to 30 min this often ends with us cumming together. Infact, the best is when she starts moaning and says, "cum with me" and of course that pushes me over the edge as she screams and squeezes me tight.
Just an example of what seems to work for me. But every woman is different. Its not always like this. Sometimes its not as intense, sometimes even more intense to the point we are both shaking with excitement. Like being 16 again.Start 3.16.15 - 7bpel, 6bpel, 5meg
Current 1.19.16 - 7.85bpel, 6.6nbpel, 5.3meg
Goal 1.19.17 - 8.5bpel, 7.5nbpel, 5.75meg
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I do something similar when I'm making it a bigger night. There are certainly many quickies with my gf as well. With newer girls I tend to make a bigger deal out of the process, and definitely love the teasing and making them beg for it part...that's a favorite of mine.
I think right now the biggest things for me are working through the random and temporary ED issue I mentioned in the other thread, and probably going longer too. Usually I go for about 10 minutes of actual sex. I know some women like 30-60+ minutes but 1.) I don't last that long the first time and 2.) the second time I go in a night I can essentially go as long as I want but often just don't want to lol. After 15min it's hot/sexy and I enjoy it a lot but I really don't have much interest in an hour long session. Sometimes I wonder if people are actually looking at the time when they say how long they fuck because 60min (even 30min) of continuous actual sex (not the foreplay) is a long ass time lol. I saw one anecdote that the average man (in some study) was having sex for ~2.5min but the women were perceiving it as ~7min.
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